Just stumbled across the board during my search for ODD and was hoping somebody could offer some help/advice.
My son is 6 (will be 7 next month) and in first grade. His first grade teacher has been complaining since September that he is disruptive, makes noises with his mouth, taps his feet and pencil constantly which disrupts the other kids, talks when he should be quiet, tries to make the other kids laugh, crawls under the stalls in the bathroom to lock the doors, and has been involved in pushing in line (my son said someone cut him in line). We disciplined him at home for putting his hands on the other child which I won't tolerate.
But for the other issues, my thoughts so far have been that he is an overactive, very normal little boy who is perhaps immature, but I didn't see this as a major problem. Especially since his kindergarten teacher never relayed anything of the sort to me. First grade is 6 hours a day, whereas in kindergarten it was 2-1/2 hours, so naturally he's antsy. The teacher has tried moving his desk away from the other kids and putting a rubberband on the foot of his chair for him to bounce his feet on. She also gives him "brain breaks" where he can take a quick walk and come back. All to no avail.
Last week the teacher told me that he has been disobeying not only her, but the gym and music teacher as well. WHen he's asked to do something, he will just simply stare at them. Silient defiance I guess you could call it. He has been bursting out in tears if he cannot understand something, and he again "had his hands on someone" (although I didn't get the full story of that incident as the teacher didn't see it herself). She has used the words "impulsive" and "out of control" when talkign about him, to which I take a little bit of offense. I agre with impulsive, but to me "out of control" would be tipping over a desk or kicking another child. So I''m a bit on the defensive at this point - he's my baby after all.
The school wants to implement a Connors-3 and from my research I see that it looks for ADHD, oppositional-defiant disorder or conduct disorder. I know he doesn't have ADHD. His attention is good for tasks he likes, and academically his grades exceed where he needs to be. But reading through the ODD literature there are SOME signs of ODD, but some of them seem quite normal for a 6 year old boy.
Obviously I need to wait for the testing to see what the school determins, but I guess my question is how do you tell the difference between a strong-willed child and one with ODD? His behavior at school is clearly disruptive, but at home it's not. He's my most challenging child by far, but I don't see the level of problems at home that the school is seeing. He's quite obediant to me and my husband.
Any advice would be appreciated. Thank you!