Maladaptive Daydreaming

Falcon's-Fang wrote:My therapists are trying to get me to stop pacing all together, but I can't go more than a day without turning violent from my lack of pacing.

I hope they find a creative method to help you stop. Because simply saying "don't do it" is ridiculous. If it were that easy, why would you need them?! They're giving a superficial response to a deep problem.

Very random question- have you been assessed at all for Autism? Only, I remember another pacer saying that was part of the issue. I think it tied in with the security from familiar routines as well as repetitive movement.

I'm glad you've found the forum, anyway. Not many answers here, but for me it's nice to know people "get it."

Ada wrote:

Falcon's-Fang wrote:My therapists are trying to get me to stop pacing all together, but I can't go more than a day without turning violent from my lack of pacing.

I hope they find a creative method to help you stop. Because simply saying "don't do it" is ridiculous. If it were that easy, why would you need them?! They're giving a superficial response to a deep problem.

Very random question- have you been assessed at all for Autism? Only, I remember another pacer saying that was part of the issue. I think it tied in with the security from familiar routines as well as repetitive movement.

I'm glad you've found the forum, anyway. Not many answers here, but for me it's nice to know people "get it."

I pace a lot, too. Usually though, I'll only do it when I'm alone- so living with my two best friends now, one who which works with me so we have the same schedule, it is easier for me to stop the pacing since they'll say something when I start. One thing I often do is take a walk now- it give me the same feeling and oportunity to daydream as the pacing (maybe the movement?)- and much more acceptable to others too. Maybe you could try taking walks, too. It could even be just around the block or in a pattern of blocks, at my college I just walk around the campus- when I was a small child I'd walk around the house.

This compulsion to daydream is what I find myself wanting, but otherwise my behavior differs. For one I do not pace, but retreat to bed or my favorite chair. The other difference I have noticed is that I am older than others who posted...much older. I have always daydreamed, but it was occasional and a nice diversion. After I 'survived' breast cancer in 2005, my real world is now that of a surgically scarred woman whose own husband no longer desires her. I was told by several doctors that the radiation treatment made my skin no longer able to heal so I cannot receive breast reconstruction. I have a beautiful fantasy world where I am whole again and desired. I spend more and more time there and catch myself sometimes moving my arms or beginning to laugh. I have even tried to convince my spouse to leave, because I see it as the only way I could ever find someone who would be willing to accept 'the disfigured me'. He will not and so I grow more sad with each passing day spending more time dreaming. Is this my future? I don't know anymore. And so I am here.

I'm glad you're here, raibreth. That seems like it has been a positive and supportive kind of daydreaming. A kind way to support yourself through such hard stuff. But I can understand you not wanting it to take over or get more immersive.

Thank you, Ada, for your kind response. It means more than mere words could convey. (Aside - I also find myself moved by Chaplin's passionate words spoken in 'The Great Dictator'...and moved to tears by his 'Limelight'.) I found solace discovering this website and knowing others are searching for answers also.

This site has really helped me, yes. Not often in definite answers. But in terms of it being OK to look. And in talking about things that I didn't think anyone else would understand.

I haven't seen Limelight, I'll have to find it. Thank you for mentioning it! TGD is the only film of his that I've seen all the way through. And I was struck by how much I enjoyed it and how moving it was.

YOUR STORY IS THE SAME AS MINE. Since I walked home from school everyday, I found it quite boring and began daydreaming (intentionally). Then it came to the point where I HAD to move while I was daydreaming. It was so much easier to daydream while moving. So I went on walks. A lot. But when it was night, I wasn't allowed to go for walks. So I started pacing in my bedroom with the door shut. But my bedroom has barely enough space to move in. So I started pacing in the living room. But it's so easy to get caught while in the living room. So I migrated to the basement. That is where I currently pace. It can go for HOURS. And if the basement is taken, then I go back to the living room. Yes, I do this everyday And yes, it happens more often when I am stressed. And yes, I make weird faces while daydreaming. I used to want to stop, but then I decided it was doing no harm. I figured that even though it was an addiction, it was also a hobby. And I am right, but there is one thing that it is interfering with. My homework. I go downstairs and pace instead of doing my homework. I also don't want the pacing to get to a point where it is interfering with other parts of my life, so I am going to try to stop. I always thought i was the only one. I was SO SURE I was the only one. Today I found out that there are others as well. All I had to do in order to find out was google it. This has been going on for years, but I never googled it once because I so sure I was the only one. But as soon as I read your story, I decided to stop. Thank you.

Can someone please tell me what you think is your personal reason for this happening to you? I'm really interested to see the main reasons. Please be specific. (Btw, I have this too.)

I think it's a mostly maladaptive coping mechanism. I do it when stressed, bored, afraid, lonely, jealous etc. Daydreaming in some of those circumstances is 100% "normal." The vast majority of people daydream. It's just the compulsive nature of it that I think is the problem. That it takes up time that "should" be spent on other activities. Like having a life.

hi Emrys.

Emrys00 wrote:Can someone please tell me what you think is your personal reason for this happening to you? I'm really interested to see the main reasons. Please be specific. (Btw, I have this too.

hmm it's kinda complicated to explain. (at least for me) but yeah as Ada said, it's coping mechanism.

i know it sounds silly but sometimes it makes me 'care less' about real life...

and the 'interesting' part of my maladaptive daydreaming is, i feel like i'm not allowed to daydream if i'm not in 'OC correct' lol. (ok.. that's related to my OCD )