Obsession Over Any Damage and with Tearing-up Trash Papers

I believe I definitely have O.C.D., but it mostly has to do with trying to avoid scratches, marks, and stains/snags (to clothes, occasionally) to certain belongings, and then checking them frequently and for long periods of time if I suspect that they are damaged. I'm more paranoid over favorite things, like jewelery, purses, nick-nacks, and even smaller/lesser things like a favorite pen, but not so much larger things such as furniture, my computer, my car, etc. However, I seem to mainly be upset over accidental damage I cause instead of slight damage that may already be on the products before I bought them. If I'm wearing something I really like, I'll try to prevent damage by increasing my body awareness and limiting my movements, wearing long sleeves to cover watches/bracelets, etc. I'm even now concerned about even mild corrosion due to acidic drinks, salt-water solutions, perfume, etc., and then cleanse with water or a damp cloth frequently. I won't even touch some items if I feel I have salt from foods, acid from certain drinks, or perfume on my fingers until I rinse them off. Furthermore, I worry about rust forming on metallic items after I clean them, so then I obsess over getting them dry right away, even if it means having the item present in front of a fan/heater after drying it with a cloth or towel. If I feel that a treasured possession even has very mild damage, I tend to not use/wear it much anymore and have even returned things numerous times. I'll feel especially terrible if I believe I was the one who caused the damage, like: "I should've known better.", "I shouldn't have moved that way which resulted in the scratch/tear.", etc. I feel that I'm enslaved to this condition, and I hate it. I know this is ultimately quirky, and I acknowledge that there are many other things in life that are much more important. I don't want to be like this, and I believe it's a form of perfectionism and control affected by fear of loss. I lost my mother over a year ago to cancer, but I had this condition ever since I was a child. (I just turned 20.) I tried to be a perfectionist in school, and my parents always stressed to take care of whatever they would buy me. I've heard that people who have O.C.D. are never be cured. Is this true, or else what should I do to become normal? This is so embarrassing.

I do also excessively tear-up trash papers and even boxes for these reasons: 1.) Garbage is public, so people won't know right away what I'm throwing away even if it's not necessarily bad. 2.) Trash will fit better in bags if condensed this way. I have lived with a lot of clutter for most of my life, and I'm sick of that as well. This is another O.C.D. issue I have, so maybe this is relative to the checking/preventive O.C.D. issue I have?

Any advice will help immensely. Thank-you.

Trash will indeed fit better in bins if you tear up the paper. I try to minimise how much pace my trash takes up by other methods too, such as neatly fitting bits of trash into others (like if I have an empty butter container, I will place as many other trash itens into it and then seal the lid, instead of just throwing the container in with its lid on). I also fear 'rust'... ...and I also hate tags on my clothes. My obsession about 'preserving' clothes goes beyond you though. i'm so bad now that I buy clothes and am then afraid to wear them because I dont' want to give them wear-and-tear.

Yep - you've guess it dude: I have a dagnosis of OCD. It very much sounds like you have the symptoms of it too. I have not heard of anyone who has been cured of this, but I think it's unfair to use that word in relation to a mental illness. With such things, we more 'adapt' to our mental problems, instead of actually being cured. However, we can get to the point where we are so adapted to our symptoms that we are 'pseudo' cured. Does that make sense? Do you think you should get some professional help dude?

Kevin

Um, I'm a woman. Sorry for not mentioning so before.

Would professional help even work? I'm skeptical about this and trying to only 'adapt' to this, because I'll ultimately always be a slave to O.C.D. anyway. I'd therefore prefer a cure since I don't want to be overwhelmed by this anymore.

I think this was all heavily rooted in my childhood and adolescence due to exposure to my parents numerous concerns, so maybe just being around different people who don't care about the things we do and therefore don't have our types of O.C.D. would free us by relieving our own anxieties? Also, maybe people who have more complicated minds, intelligence, or fears are more prone to mental conditions like O.C.D.? I think this is a form of dreading loss, and I believe it can be realized before any trauma occurs. Furthermore, perfectionists may be more apt to develop these stressful habits.

Also, I'll try my best to keep clothes away from windows/sunlight because I'm afraid of color-fading. Some of these things are so habitual anymore that they may not even come to mind.

Thanks Chucky/Kevin.

Hey,

preofessional help will work for you, but only if you're enthusiastic about it. You have to accept it and agree to go out of your own free will for it to be effective. If you go and you're skeptical about it, then you'll get nothing from it. try to bare that in mind. I think it's important to consider.

You made a good point though - i.e. you implied that maybe being around others who are more relaxed than us could be beneficial for us. I think that this is certainly true. They are so relaxed that they could even absorb some of our silly OCD habits too, and maybe make us 'less' OCDish.

Take care my friend (dudette!; not 'dude'),
Kevin

I found your posting online and am so surprised because I have EXACTLY the same problem with you.
I am afraid that my belongings will get damage by any means, such as sunlight, acidic material, etc.
I used to close all my windows and made sure that there is no sunlight coming into room so that it does not damage small knick knacks such as clothing, laptop, ipod etc. that I cherish. Like you, I can care less about bigger stuff such as furniture etc.

Recently, I had developed more fear to gasoline and other "chemical" liquids. After I filled my tank at the gas station, I will make sure that I wash my hand for example.
Then I accepted a job in an auto company. (I am an engineer). I thought it would be seomthing like CBT, in which I expose myself to things I am afraid of so that my anxiety lessen. But instead, I am getting more uncomfortable now. Everyday at work I feel my heart pounds so hard. Sometimes I am unable to concentrate.

Anyway, I just want to know whether you have found a professional help and whats your progress.

Thanks!

I'm sorry I haven't been on here for awhile. No, I haven't gotten professional help yet. However, I notice that my OCD isn't as intense as it used to be since I'm starting to realize that I don't have absolute control over everything in my life. This includes the little things that I do still worry about althogh not as much. I could now have apathy from surrendering to many things which I feel I can't do anything about, such as physical health issues, "friends" leaving me in odd ways, etc. I'm not sure if I'm better-off now or not.

I can relate...

personally I don't know if it's best to push these things away or just let them slide... I know when my energy is up, my OCD type traits are as well... I have similar ones, wanting to keep things in perfect condition... I've been stressing over the fact that my DS has the tiniest scratches on it now, they are so small that you can't even see it at all unless you hold it at the perfect angle under a bright light... but I still sit there and inspect it and fret over it.

Things like that go on until I realize I can't physically keep everything perfect and then... I just throw my hands up and kind of say screw everything. Just get really apathetic and feel quite.. dead inside.

!?! wrote:However, I seem to mainly be upset over accidental damage I cause instead of slight damage that may already be on the products before I bought them. If I'm wearing something I really like, I'll try to prevent damage by increasing my body awareness and limiting my movements, wearing long sleeves to cover watches/bracelets, etc.

I'll feel especially terrible if I believe I was the one who caused the damage, like: "I should've known better.", "I shouldn't have moved that way which resulted in the scratch/tear.", etc. I feel that I'm enslaved to this condition, and I hate it. I know this is ultimately quirky, and I acknowledge that there are many other things in life that are much more important. I don't want to be like this, and I believe it's a form of perfectionism and control affected by fear of loss.

I joined this forum just to reply to your message - so hi everyone.

I just want to cry and hug you - because this is exactly the same ordeal I've been going through since I was a kid (I was diagnosed with OCD during that time as well.)

Everything that is new or "shrink-wrapped" has that kind of sparkling perfection that I love to admire and preserve. But reality is - that even things as hard as diamonds can be damaged over time - so trying to preserve this "new perfection" of an object is pointless. Wear-and-tear of things are inevitable. And I don't mind even if it's natural - but if I so much as made a scratch because I accidentally dropped my laptop or camera or whatever, I totally freak out and start inspecting it. Of course doing this serves no purpose other than exacerbate my anxiety even more as I looked at this now "marred" object.

I hope you guys can give me some advice on how to deal with this - as it becomes an extreme mental burden on maintaining and even getting new "prestine" things - as I become a slave to it. And it totally defeats the joy and pleasure of having things in the first place

Welcome Zaxy! I am glad you are here. I hope you enjoy this place and that you find much deserved support.
One

To the original poster,

The extreme need to maintain belongings in mint condition, does it interfere with your life and cause you pervasive suffering in various aspects--e.g., social, mental, or financial? If so, then these symptoms should be alleviated. If not, then you are okay.

People with O.C.D. are never cured because there's not much to cure. Consider that the way you are is simply how your are. Normality is a consensus and a set standard, which there will always be exceptions to, and abnormality can be good or bad. For example, a person who is highly gifted in mathematics would be considered abnormal. On the other hand, a person who exits a room but cannot leave it without checking the light switch 5 times or more would also be considered abnormal. So abnormal does not mean cursed or doomed. O.C.D. can be stabilized.

Perhaps you may want to ease the guilt you feel over items being damaged because that can be a constant troubling feeling.