Prolonged Hocd?

Hey all,

So a quick brief description of my situation.

When i first got hocd i was about 27 years old, ever since i was a kid i've always been attracted to women, when hocd first came about i was on holiday, i was approached by a gay bloke who made an awkward scene (alcohol involved), at the time this didn't phase me, but the next morning i woke up panicking that i had turned gay, for the next 6 months i showed all symptoms of hocd.

Fast forward to my current situation,

literally 4-5 years on, the anxiety weakened to the point of no panic, i could get on with my life as normal, however when i first developed hocd my attraction was fully there for the opposite sex, yet after 2 months roughly my attraction slowly diminished, fast forward to now and my attraction has never fully come back, my libido also went very flat, yet for very short periods of time sometimes they both come back and i almost feel completely normal, but then it disappears again.

Also it's like i only notice good looking guys, it's almost feels like i want to look at them, yet again with little anxiety when this happens, the thoughts of sexual encounters with same sex doesn't disgust me, yet again i don't want to engage in them, i believe i've become so familiar with these thoughts that i'm just so used to them.

I almost feel like i've been so engaged with these thoughts and feelings for so long that i sub-consciously think about them all the time, but yet where the anxiety has been gone for a while it makes me question why my libido and attraction hasn't come back completely?
It almost feels like denial, but i can't get my head around it, having romantic relationships with the opposite sex from an early age, only ever fantasizing about girls, i just question how that one night can completely turn my life upside down.

Has anyone else been through a similar situation?

I would just like some advice on whether this still sounds like OCD and whether you can offer any advice to try get over the doubt of it being hocd.

Thanks for reading.