Real event OCD - nothing helps

Hello,

I suffer under many kinds of OCD topics. I have OCD about sexuality, OCD about Harm, OCD about Religion or Magical thoughts, OCD about Relationship etc. etc. But since more than 3/4 year I struggle with aggressive Real Event OCD.
My ACT and Exposition exercises working well with all kinds of "Fear" OCD, but I it goes about Failures and Guilt, nothings works well for me. I met many therapists with a lot of exercises but nothing can redeem me from my feeling of guilt.

The story is that I made a big mistake in my past. I drank and drove - I know that was stupid, but I did this failure. Furthermore, on the way home a Hedgehog appears on the street, I drove right over him (middle), so the Hedgehog came not under the wheels. I walked back and tried to search for the Hedgehog but I couldn't find him. It's most likely that nothing happened to the hedgehog. After this experience, I lived my life for many years, got kids, etc. Suddenly I thought about the situation and felt very guilty because I couldn't be sure 100% that nothing happened to the hedgehog. I tried to analyze the situation and make OCD typical reinsurance of the situation, but I came to the point, that I will never know that nothing happened to the hedgehog because I couldn't find him. My feelings of guilt increased a lot.
Since this time, I walk through life with a chronic feeling of guilt and nothing I try helps me to get out of this depressing mode.

At the moment I am in a clinic and my therapist wants to work with me on exercises where I should consciously make mistakes.
Unfortunately, I don't trust that these exercises will help me because my feeling about the situation will not change if I do a lot of other mistakes.

I search for another point of view or an exercise that already helped other people with Real Event OCD. I want to discover more ways to recover. I have kids and a wife, and I could cry every minute because I am not able to live a normal life with them. Any ideas or techniques, especially from people with Real Event OCD are welcome. Thank you

Hello and welcome!

Well, it's a hedgehog. Could have been a lot worse. But it wasn't. And it's not as if it were someone's pet hedgehog.

Especially in this forum, I'm pretty confident none of us want to run over anything. If I hit a armadillo or a possum, or worse, a raccoon (i'm fond of raccoons), I'm going to feel bad but it is what it is. Critters cross the road. Critters get hit. Sometimes we just can't help it. And you might have hit that hedgehog whether you were drinking and driving, or not. Maybe I don't know how hedgehogs cross the road but in my neck of the woods possums and wild pigs and such well they just don't care they'll walk out in front of the headlights. And armadillos are even worse: they'll get startled and jump straight up so there's not even trying to pass over in the middle. It just is what it is.

Thank you. I think my problem is that I made a failure. My brain says to me "you made a failure and a living thing may have lost his life".

I have no idea how I can handle these feelings of guilt while my brain tells me these messages.