An actual erection to HOCD

Yeah I lost, this happened 3 weeks ago now and I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it. I stumbled on a hentai Instagram page and there was an image of Whis from Dragon Ball, he didn’t have a penis but he was drawn even more feminine than he actually is, I also have a thing for big butts and they gave him one, it was a weird page it like 5 different images of Whis doing sexual $#%^ and I’ve never been attracted to Whis, he looked feminine but knowing he was a guy made me not attracted to him but these images confused me and here’s what happened, when I first saw the images I didn’t feel anything, I just said “wtf” out loud and then like a day later I checked the image, I felt a stronger reaction and I started getting worried, the day after that I looked at the account again and this time something weird happened.

I looked at the image again and felt a groinal response, I touched my penis to check and nothing happened, stupidly and through an unfortunate sequence of events I looked the image again and when I looked underneath my blanket I had small movement, I freaked out and in an attempt to calm myself down I said “erection can happen just from touching your penis, this movement probably happened because you touched it earlier to check” so I tested that theory and touched my penis again, let go and checked the image and it made it so much worse that this time I got a full blown erection, I wish I had just settled with the small movement but I got greedy and this was the result. The erection itself felt weird there was no lust in it but still it was an erection nonetheless, something I never thought would happen to me and I’ve been fighting with the will to live ever since

Unfortunately ruminating only makes it worse. i used to have HOCD for a while but eventually i didn't care about if i was gay or not. sometimes i wish i was BI and just get it over with.

bahamut wrote:sometimes i wish i was BI and just get it over with.

No you don't. Unless you're one of the lucky ones who can do what you want with whom whenever. Otherwise, you're stuck wanting whatever you ain't got. I can't imagine being anything else, but it's not easy being Bi.