POCD, I need help!!

Hihi!
I posted on here a couple weeks ago and am back for more support.
This should me moderately quick. I really need some help.

I've overcome the intrusive thoughts and shameful things I've done... That I know of.

The current problem is now my brain is searching for things I may have done that are weird or questionable.
I'm still a teenager, yet have been watching porn since I was 7.
The unfathomable amount of things I could have thought about things is so wide and obscure, my mind won't stop. Even subconsciously.

I am in desperate need of a way to combat this.

I know that the past doesn't matter, and I've never done anything so terrible I might as well be exiled from life.

Present tense is the truth. And I was fine for a week until I suddenly recounted something I THOUGHT. I can't even remember what it was and it was only a couple days ago.

POCD is of no help for me as a weird kid- and even teenager.

Literally help.

OCD be hungry and gone looking for something else to hold over you, it sounds like.

ohmygoodness1102 wrote:I'm still a teenager, yet have been watching porn since I was 7.

Yeah I have intrusive harm OCD, but I'm pretty sure the occasional violent thoughts I get towards those who invented the internet are not intrusive. Good thing we don't have time machines...

Well, reading your other posts, I know you have a pretty good grasp on this- even though it's eating at you in the moment. I'm not sure what I can add to it. Other than you have to cop an attitude of not caring about it. Which is what I do with intrusive harm thoughts. I'll worry about it, when I've done it. Not before. You know, we're talking about weird sexual things. We're not talking about rape or murder. You have to cop the 'tude that you'll worry about being some pervy little weirdo, when you do something that really affects another person, and not before. When you do something that's clearly illegal, and not before. Because as you've said, you're not your thoughts.

Yeah, And I'm sure most of it has to do with guilt at this point.
Not to mention, it's clearly about me and not some kids.

I probably wouldn't be even worrying about it if I didn't even remember- That's why it's partially funny.

At this point, I just laugh cause this sucks and sometimes it's literally laughable how unrealistic.

ohmygoodness1102 wrote:Not to mention, it's clearly about me and not some kids.

Could you elaborate?

Snaga wrote:

ohmygoodness1102 wrote:Not to mention, it's clearly about me and not some kids.

Could you elaborate?

The hentai. It has more to do with me rather than the loli characters. That's all.

ohmygoodness1102 wrote:

Snaga wrote:

ohmygoodness1102 wrote:Not to mention, it's clearly about me and not some kids.

Could you elaborate?

The hentai. It has more to do with me rather than the loli characters. That's all.

As in you're imagining yourself being in their place?