STILL Scared I'm A Transsexual

Hi, I am still getting the thoughts every day.

I can't take it.

I want to be a man, I don't want to become a woman.

Please please please, I can't take this.

My life is already messed up enough as I have multiple physical and mental issues so dealing with these trans thoughts is just too much for me to deal with as I am already trying to cope with all of my other issues.

I don't want to be a transsexual, I want to be a man.

Please please please, I want these thoughts to stop.

I am in therapy right now but it is for my depression rather than my OCD.

I have had OCD therapy in the past though (CBT with some ERP)

I dunno what to do.

I can't cope with my life.

I keep responding to the thoughts "maybe I am, maybe I'm not, so what" but the thoughts keep coming back

I want to be a man, I want these trans thoughts to go.

I am so lost and confused and I can't handle what I'm going through.

I don't desire being a woman but I keep having thoughts that I am a transsexual.

Please, I need ESCAPE. I need to get away from these nasty vile thoughts.

What even does recovery look like?

A few days ago I thought I was in recovery as I have the thoughts less now and I've heard many times that for some people the thoughts never go away

AAAAAAHHHHHHHH

I don't want to be a woman, I want to be a man.

I just called an OCD helpline and left a voice message but I didn't really know what to say.

I feel like I can't cope keeping all these trans thoughts bottled up.

I don't want to become a woman.

I get scared my depression is because I am secretly trans.

Also now I have a lot of clothes that are black (I put on weight through my BED so had to buy biggeer clothes) and sometimes I feel like I would rather wear different clothes but maybe I am tired of the clothes because I am trans.

I hope not though.

Also I really dislike the hair on my feet and toes, this could be another huge trans warning sign.

I don't want to take female hormones, I don't weant to have SRS surgery, I don't want to become a woman

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE

I WANT TO BE A MAN

I can't cope, I don't want to become a woman.

I need to be saved from this transsexuality, I don't know how though.

Did you have the CBT/ERT through the same therapist you're seeing now?

And have you told them about this?

Snaga wrote:Did you have the CBT/ERT through the same therapist you're seeing now?

And have you told them about this?

I am having CBT through my current therapist but the focus is on depression.

My ERP was through different therapists.

They know I have OCD but we haven't gone into details but I think he might have seen the notes about my OCD as my previous therapist I spoke about it to was in the same organisation so I think he might know the content.

I will bring it up in the next session anyway but he is on leave this week.

I just want to be a man, I hope I can stay as one.

Fingers crossed