Not sure what this obsession is....

Hi! I'm new to this forum.
I was wondering if anyone has any experience/thoughts on this particular obsession I have. I'm not sure if it's OCD or something else so I just thought I'd try posting in here.

Basically, I used to work in a restaurant as a waitress when I was 18-19 (I'm now 21, turning 22 in October). There was this guy who came in once and at first I thought I just had an imaginary crush on him. Like you know sometimes you see a stranger on public transport or something and they fill that image you need for your romance fantasies for a couple of days and then you forget about them (anyone else? lol I'm assuming other people do this.) Anyway - I thought it was just like that seeing as I didn't talk to him or anything I actually hid in the kitchen cause idk what to do around attractive people. But then it became months, and his image would still come into my head everyday. Now it's been years! It's not as intense as it used to be but he still lingers in my mind. Now this isn't like an obsession with an ex or friend or someone I am familiar with...I never saw him again after this one time! Like literally just once.

So it's kinda weird...I have considered that maybe it's OCD because it's a recurring thought that I've tried to ignore/get rid of but doesn't really go away. Let me know if you think it's something different/if I should post in a different topic.

It's also gone through different phases like at times I felt almost a bit paranoid like he would kidnap me or he was watching me, or like I could feel that he was near me. I was aware of the fact that these thoughts were irrational but they were there nonetheless. Other times it was just your usual romance daydream. Just very persistent!

Any thoughts?

Welcome to the board. I'm not a psychologist or mental health professional. I've suffered from OCD and anxiety most of my life (31 year old male). Therefore, my post is not medical advice and I encourage you to see a mental health therapist if you can and you see it necessary.

OCD is comprised of two parts. The first is obsessions, and the second is compulsions. Obsessions are irrational thoughts that recur in our heads. It's a repetitive thought, that is generally unwanted. The compulsions are the actions you take to satisfy or alleviate the thought.

You work at a restaurant. It's a social place where random people come in, some of whom are attractive. You found this guy attractive and hid in the back which isn't abnormal. Are these thoughts unwanted and random? If so, you should accept them and move on. You found the guy attractive, so what? It happens. That's what you should tell yourself.

mc1 wrote:Welcome to the board. I'm not a psychologist or mental health professional. I've suffered from OCD and anxiety most of my life (31 year old male). Therefore, my post is not medical advice and I encourage you to see a mental health therapist if you can and you see it necessary.

OCD is comprised of two parts. The first is obsessions, and the second is compulsions. Obsessions are irrational thoughts that recur in our heads. It's a repetitive thought, that is generally unwanted. The compulsions are the actions you take to satisfy or alleviate the thought.

You work at a restaurant. It's a social place where random people come in, some of whom are attractive. You found this guy attractive and hid in the back which isn't abnormal. Are these thoughts unwanted and random? If so, you should accept them and move on. You found the guy attractive, so what? It happens. That's what you should tell yourself.

Yes, I'm not suggesting that finding someone attractive is unusual, but its just the length of time that it has stuck in my head which is unusual for me (3/4 years now), and the paranoia. However I'm still able to function so it's not really bad...I just want to understand.

Thank you for the very clear explanation of OCD, I think maybe what I have is not that...as I don't really have compulsions in relation to this obsession. It's the obsession part without the compulsion. But anyways thank you! And I have just started therapy so I will bring it up!

Hey there, glad to hear you're getting help. A person can have just obsessions, that's called Pure O as compulsions generally don't accompany it.