HOCD and my childhood

i have been fine for a couple months as I have liked a girl I asked her and and she rejected me I got the good old HOCD again but only this time about my childhood where I experimented with kissing etc I don’t know how many times but it was when I was young I still had attraction to the opposite sex but as I grew older I just forgot about it I had crushes in school on girls but due to my social anxiety never acted on it which meant I never had a girlfriend even when they say such and such likes you I get scared and never had any other same sex experiences as a adult (I’m 19) I only asked the girl out as my psychologist is helping with that but he always said “if you ever get the thoughts back tell me and we can revisit them” I’m afraid to tell him about this as I’m scared he will say I’m gay and I’m doubting it this isn’t false memory’s or anything as I remember them before the HOCD. My HOCD is saying “your gay because you did that straight people don’t enjoy it your gay come out am I gay or was I just a curious kid this is so scary please help