Hocd or gay??

I'll tell you my story.
I'm 19 and I'm a virgin, because I did not have the opportunity and I never called that, I always looked at girls.
Since I was a child I've always been normal, I used to play with a cart, a ball, a boy's play, even when I was young I started to notice girls more respectfully, most of my friends were always men and I got along with them, I was always very social, very few girls but the ones I liked, I did not stay with mine I've never seen in my life, my dream has always been to have a wife and children and to be happy, I've always encouraged that.
Almost a month ago came a question of nothing in my head, "Am I gay?" , of the same nothing, I answered to myself that not because I never noticed man only in woman, but that hammered my head all the days, causing me crises of anxiety and despair, ah forgot to mention, since I did not stay with so many girls I always saw a lot of pornography, always straight, I saw gay porn one time or another but I always found it strange and it did not excite me damn, just porn straight, after that question my days were hell, it made me desperate to think if I could become gay or if I was and did not know, homosexual images and thoughts of finding handsome men haunted my mind in a way that my sleep was almost gone.
However, now I have come to think of nothing that I like my best friend, who is almost my brother, I have known him for 8 years, I have never felt anything for him except true friendship, then nothing comes from saying that I like him and I kiss him, I can not take it anymore, I do not want it in my head, I do not feel any of that of what my mind means, I do not want to discover gay or become one, I would end my dreams and all my concepts of life, thoughts of suicide come all the time, I do not know what else to do.
The thoughts are as random as possible, came one of the type "woman's arm and slender grind and is not attractive", kkkkkkkkkkk, I never thought about it in my life, I always found the woman's arm normal and that it combined with the beautiful and delicate body of the woman, these thoughts make me very low, it seems that more and more I become gay or I will become, I do not want this for me, I always wanted to marry the woman of my life and have beautiful children that I'm going to love . I do not know what to do, am I gay or do I have hocd ??? Can someone help me