POCD or? (possible trigger)

Hello. I have had some things happen years ago, and after they happened I went through a horrible phase where I thought something horrible was going to happen to me because of it. Time passed and so did the feelings. I still struggle from Bipolar, depression and anxiety however. Recently a set of events have triggered me and I have once again become obsessed with the thoughts that something terrible is going yo happened to me due to what happened years ago in the past. I feel sick, I have no appetite, I just want to cry and sleep. It has gotten so bad that I have thought about just killing myself and finally getting out of this hell. Ive been told before to just let it go and forget about it, but I feel like this is going to haunt me forever. I don't know what to do.