I'm a teen living with hold please read

Hi I have been living with what is called hocd for about 11 weeks and It did actually disappear for 2 weeks before and I have had days where it has literally gone but it always comes back. I am a teenager and have been known quite dirty minded about girls and I would of never thought I would worry about being gay because I am the complete opposite and I even prefer to masterbate to lesbian porn cuz I don't like the look of dicks anyway one day my bro called me a #######1 then I reply to him saying I wank to girls and call him a #######1 but then he said I have had girlfriends and you haven't And then basically I am an English junior international tennis player and at training I hit one unusual girly swing because I slipped and I thought that strike was a bit gay but then it went out my mind but when I came home and started imaging girls and wanked about 10 times to prove and I have had the spikes and all of it kinda since but It has got better and I know that I am straight but I still get the spikes and and recently I had a spike about kissing a guy and I found it digusting but every time I prove it digusting or any spike wrong I get random anxiety even though I have proved it wrong and got anxiety so I prove it again and today I feel much better but I don't know what else to think about cuz I get no present spikes but I think about past spikes and get nervous and axiety hits me but atm I have proved that I find the idea of being with a guy disgusting and my axiety has gone down and I feel like Idk whether to prove it wrong again or accept the thought