Compulsions to tell people my problems

I have an annoying compulsion to tell people all my problems. It's really bad with particular friends. So bad that once one friend was in hospital and I was still texting him with my problems. I know it's a compulsion because I feel an overwhelming need to do it and anxiety if I don't, which goes away when I tell someone, then I feel anxious that I am being selfish by telling them.

I think part of this is because I have a need for attention, and part is that I feel the need to confess things and that I'm lying if people ask how I am and I say I'm fine.

The reason for the current post is my friend A. She's been so great to me and I've been telling her all my problems. In the past when she's had problems she's told me she still wants me to be honest about how I'm feeling. But yesterday she told me that something had happened that has really upset her. She's going through hell and I still want to tell her my problems. I am stopping myself, but it's killing me. I want to do it so badly, I feel terrible anxiety. But I can't be selfish.

I am having a terrible time of it too, I went home from work sick yesterday because my mind is all over the place. Over the weekend my wife and I had a terrible argument about sex because of my compulsion to need sex from her and I was beating myself up about being selfish. When A told me what had happened to her I worried it's my fault just through knowing me. And felt selfish for telling her my problems. So I went home and self-harmed. I'm also continually anxious at work. Now if I get down to 100 unread emails I panic and avoid answering them in case I run out. People have emailed me and need replies and I am too scared to reply.

I want to tell A all this but I know if I do I am the most selfish person in the world, but the urge to tell her is overwhelming. I've told another friend but I feel like I need to tell A too. But I am a terrible, terrible person and constantly feeling like hurting myself to punish myself.

I told her and now I feel like the worst person in the world.