Is this a form of OCD--like Pure O but different

I'm deseperately trying to figure out what is going on with my mind and how I can treat it. A quick history--my mom has generalized anxiety disorder and is treated with Lexapro. She worries a lot about family members getting hurt and dying. My dad has what I believe to be OCD--he wears socks at all times to avoid getting "germs" on his feet. He can't let his clothes (other than socks) ever touch the floor. He checks and rechecks all locks. He is a safety freak and obsessed with details. He has little post-its notes everywhere on his walls reminding him of what things he is thinking about or needs to do. He won't admit he has a problem though and it drives my mom crazy.

So onto me--I have a very obsessive/overly analytical mind. I'm not sure how to explain it. It prevents me from living in the moment, because my mind is so obsessed with questions and remembering past events. Here are a few examples that happen to me non-stop.

My boys ask to watch the show Good Luck Charlie with me. Instead of just sitting there enjoying the show, my mind obsessively wonders:

When was the last time my boys watched this show? Last week? Last month?
When was the first time?
Who introduced us to this show? Why did they tell us about it?
Have my boys watched every episode with me, or have they watched any by themselves? How many episodes has my husband watched?
Will this show still be popular when my 3 year old is 7? etc etc etc

I will obsessively try to answer all these questions in my head but of course, I can't remember or know everything so many of these questions remain unanswered. AND IT DRIVE ME CRAZY! If I can't remember who first told us about this show, I obsessively try to remember over and over again.

Another example: I take my boys swimming. Instead of focusing on the fun moment I think:

--Did my mom come with us last time we swam, or was it my mother-in-law?
--Did my 5 year old wear a life jacket last time?
--How many times did my 3 year old go on the waterslide last year?
--How many times did I take them to this pool back in 2008?

I will spend the whole freaking time at the pool trying to answer these questions and drive myself crazy. Something else I do (that is starting to drive my husband insane) is that I ask and pester others to help me figure out the answers to my obsessions. For example:

I put my 5 year old to bed. Suddenly I am obsessed with wondering what his EXACT bedtime routine was when he was 2. Did he get stories first, or did we sing songs? How many songs? What kind of blanket did he have? Did he drink milk before bed?? etc etc. And since I won't remember the answer to all these questions, I will go bug my husband to see if he remembers. SOmetimes he does, and most times he doesn't. And he will say, "why? Why do you need to remember this?' and the answer is "I don't know. But it bugs me! I just need to know. When I cant' figure out the answer to something, I can't let it go."

I also repeat conversations in my head over and over. Mostly I repeat what the other person said, trying to remember their exact words from hours long conversations and analyze what they meant or how certain topics came up.

I don't know what to do but its getting worse. I waste SO MUCH mental energy obsessing about things that I know DON"T MATTER. But I can't help it. Anyway, I don't worry about stuff like hurting others or myself or have weird/perverted thoughts I can't get rid of. So my obsessions are not like the Puro-O types I have read about.

Hi BusyMom -

I'm sorry if this seems like the standard reply: unless I missed something, you didn't tell us whether you were seeking professional help or not? If not, I think that is the place to start. It certainly seems like you are suffering from OCD, but there may be other factors involved; it's hard to tell if something else happening without more background information.

I don't think it is a good idea to look for "flavors" of OCD or how yours might be different. If it is truly OCD then it all comes from the same source - anxiety. How it manifests itself is particular to a person and situation, but the OCD "engine" is the same. That is what I understand of OCD.

It really sounds like your life is dominated by these obsessive thoughts and I am sorry for that. Throw everything at a pdoc: symptoms, family life, medical history, etc, and let them find a base diagnosis. You can start with treatment and go from there. Don't go it alone.

good luck,

Otter.

Yes, this sounds like OCD to me. Your compulsions are mental, but they're still compulsions.
Try reading the posts at www.ocdla.com/blog, especially the ones about mental checking and
memory hoarding. You will get some insight into your problem.

It sounds like your parents prob have ocd too.