I have Pure-O

I know I have Pure-O OCD. In addition, I have Asperger's Syndrome and ADD (the three can often go hand-in-hand, as literature suggests), but the OCD is the only one of the three that I find negative/bothersome. I've never brought up the specifics of my obsessions, since they are very unusual even for OCD. With my Asperger's, I have unusual interests, which manifest in my obsessions. The one I come the closest to is the "maybe I'm gay" obsession, only for me it's related to the MBTI (Myers Briggs Type Indicator, for those who know about it). It may sound less serious/urgent to others, but my psychological type is tied in with my self-image, and it is indeed related to all my thoughts/actions in the world. Therefore, I am frequently stuck in thought loops (analyzing everything from my childhood to my present ways of experiencing things) trying to reassure myself that I am not a different type (Thinker vs. Feeler is my biggest obsession, if you're familiar). Since topics like this attract unorthodox thinkers, I've often wondered if there are closet OCDers with the exact same obsession. Another obession (though a distant second) is analyzing a woman's specific words/body language to determine whether she was attracted to me. My obsessions can take up to hours of my day, and it's as if I don't want to do anything else (whether recreational or work-related) until I've resolved them, since I can't function properly (or enjoy my existence) without knowing that I have my MBTI type right. I imagine the homosexuality obsession has a similar effect on people, especially when talking to the opposite sex.

The main reason I am posting this is to see if there are others with Pure-O who have similar experiences, who may be able to provide feedback/advice. 90% of OCD advice is related to actual rituals (hand-washing, etc.) which I cannot relate to. Even when I take the Pure-O screening, it doesn't pick up on it for me--it only tests for COMMON obsessions (harming others, etc.). This has made it hard to find a treatment plan that works for me.

Another thing that frustrates me is the tip about "living with uncertainty." This seems contrary to all the other facts/advise on OCD. We know for a fact that obsessions come from faulty wiring in the caudate nucleus, cingulate gyrus, etc. Yet calling it "uncertainty" is like negating this and saying "but maybe it's real." Because of this, every time the "accepting uncertainty" lecture replays in my mind, it actually makes my OCD worse, because I am determined to prove my obsessions wrong.

Nevertheless, none of the books/articles have given me a permanent solution, so let me ask: accepting that our obsessions might be right--is this really the only way out? Also, I'm not sure we're allowed to ask/give advise about specific medications, but I would appreciate anyone's advise on where to start in this realm (other than just "see a therapist.")

Hello

I am new to the forum and also sorry to say that I have no good enough advise for you at this time. I too have pure-o ocd. No hand washing, no light switching etc.... In fact i am a slob and can go two weeks or so without bathing when in a "bad time" because the thoughts take up so much of my energy that I cannot function or do much, even though I have big dreams and plans etc. plan things and never follow through..I can go from one extreme to the next. I have had pure o for about twelve or thirteen years, I am twenty four now. I also have been through the ocd obsessions about mbti, in the past. Frustrated over it obsessing over which type I was or was not, who I should be more like, which is better, etc. that lasted about two or three years with mbti along with other obsessions. My boyfriend also has Asperger's syndrome, so I have a pretty good understanding on it. I have sometimes felt that the key to beating the ocd would be to admit that life is uncertain indeed...we have to face these things just like everyone else in the world..we aren't exempt......but it's really not the solution to give someone going through a relapse or a very bad episode, because it surely makes the ocd worst, and won't help at all if the obsession isn't even possible (like a time where I couldn't stop myself from thoughts or obsessions about people bones falling apart if they jumped up and down) to the point where I couldn't stay in gym or dance class and ended up failing it i n highschool .... So I think ultimately it may be true that we must accept uncertainty but ...actually having a bad obsessive episode is a whole new all game and I don't think it would work when we are in that mind set as the thoughts don't really consider the good possibilities, only the bad ones. A "regular" person with a "regular" mindset would handle it differently. ( I am here doubting myself by the way lol)
I don't have good advise at the moment but I too would like to hear what anyone has to share if they have any ideas or information. My obsessions also take hours out of my day and I am glad to find other people going through similar experiences with pure o because typical ocd with the hand washing and orderliness is a different experience than what we have.

Hello,

I apologize for the delay...I hadn't given it much thought in the last couple of months, as I actually improved drastically. I'm now experiencing a lapse, however.

The book that helped me the most was Coping With OCD by Bruce Hyman and Troy Dufrene. There is a specific section that is geared towards pure-O. The first time I read it, I essentially dismissed it, but the second time, I really allowed to sink in--I was willing to do whatever it took. While the "uncertainty" thing is in there, they do offer several different mental strategies for managing pure-O. Like you said, it is probably best to read this when in a positive state, not in the middle of an episode.

Very interesting that you had the MBTI-related obsessions as well. I turn 27 next month, and I've had that exact same one since I was about 22. This reaffirms my suspicion that MBTI obsessions w/ OCD are not as uncommon as one may think.

I will be seeing my therapist in a couple of weeks, and will run this by him. He may have some advise on medications. When reading, I often have to struggle to get through a single page, as the anxiety is activated and I have to keep rereading and struggle to absorb it. I would guess this is a combination of ADD and OCD (perhaps a single glitch in my brain wiring that contributes to both of these). It seems like something medication may help correct, and I'll see if it helps with the obsessions too.

Let me know how you're progressing. Thanks for the reply.