News of Narcissistic Personality Disorder Forum

I recently read about "covert narcissism", and noticed that a lot of the traits seem to describe me pretty well. I have serious self esteem issues, I tend to be shy and reserved to avoid negative judgment, I am very easily influenced by other people's opinions, I am always secretly trying to impress people in almost everything I do right down my posture and mannerisms, I am having serious problems deciding what I want to ...

So people often say that PD behaviour doesn't make sense...that it is irrational

But actually it is not. It is perfectly rational for the person, not because they are deluded or in denial necessarily, but because their needs are different.

So their behaviour is rational...and you are essentially judging their behaviour from the standpoint of your own needs, which makes it appear irrational in your eyes.

So actually even calling the behaviour disordered in this ...

I'm a covert narc and I've known this is some ways all my life, dunno how I learnt it:

I like to devalue myself, sell myself short, remove everyones hostility against me, make myself the underdog - the covert. I actually lay out my flaws for everyone to see but infact, under the guise of the underdog I keep my qualities hidden or flaunt them in diletant style(deniability, I told you I'm a superman and ...

I'm interested in how narcissists assess other people. How do you decide who is useful to you? What buttons to push? What is your approach to understanding a person's innate personality? Observation, or a more exacting method? Do you have any advice for picking up on manipulatable traits?

By intimacy I mean getting to know someone beyond the superficial. For an overt narcissist, I have read that it is a threat to their uniqueness. Like it's an insult towards their superiority. For covert narcissists, it seems much more hostile, like you are threatening their life by asking for accountability or by bringing up something that MIGHT turn emotional (NOT dramatic, just an honest exchange of explanations).

I first want to express my rage. I suggested I was a narcissist on this board a few months back. Someone said I wasn't on here. I took this as evidence that I didn't need to worry about it. I am now guessing that the person who wrote this actually gets some sort of perverse feeling of superiority by knowing that he is a narcissist and special in someway. It has become part of his ...

NEW POSITIVE INFORMATION!!!
I have an extensive email to send regarding whether or not I have an opportunity,

I broke up with her 2 months ago. Here was my reasoning:
In my ultimate battle to not be alone, I selfishly stayed with her in hopes that my feelings of differing personalities, would change. I did not want to be alone, and at times I saw how isolated she was (because of the family issue) I ...

I took this from my response in another post..

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Your relationship with a narc is no different than that of an addict with a crack habit.

Abstain completely or you have nobody to blame but yourself.

Trying to figure out a way to take the drug safely without negative consequences is not an option.

You are always taking a risk. Is the high worth it?

That is your choice to make.

The drug doesn't ...

Fears can run so deep they can split personalities.

In the case of the narcissist the primary fear was created by invalidating the narcissists possibly overemotional state. The narcissist grew a fear "of himself", of his emotions and what they cause and started to deny himself as the source of these negative emotions. The emotions would be deemed negative because they would result in his suffering. In this denial he lost himself and in losing ...

I have a question / observation for you narcs.

I find that you all love to be entertained and you love variety. Kind of like a king ordering that new dishes be brought in from exotic parts of the world for you to sample.

I find that you lack imagination. You can't dream up something fun to do. You can't even imagine what the future might be like if this happened or if that happened. ...