Info on Sam Vaknin

Characteristics wrote:Sum1, it sounds like you get off to the English language.

I suppose that is an accurate characterisation, considering that I recently found it somewhat weird to be writing in my native language what I could have written readily in English without noticing anything in particular. I noted that it would be sad and tragic to forget the language of the honour and the heroes, as we refer to Swedish. At least the narcissists amongst us love this self-aggrandising way of describing ourselves, our language, race, wasp waists, or anything else about us. At least, this is nicer than cutting oneself, or even killing oneself.

Characteristics wrote:. . . I don't blame you <3

That you. I don't want to be blamed. In fact, to blame me is usually, one of the most dysfunctional thing that one can do to me, and perhaps to anyone.

harris wrote:You can learn techniques, behaviors, skills, etc..., but the "core" is unchangeable. You can never escape who you really are.

I don't think any aspect of human life is unchangeable except the way it ends.

Of course, it looks silly with those large, blue letters, but blue is my favourite colour, and you said you liked my histrionic ways, so this time, you have no-one to blame but yourself, but please don't. That is a dysfunctional and counter-productive behaviour too. I'm proud of having no remorse, and I wish I had no shame or embarrassment, but I wish I had some more empathy, because it's such a wonderful tool. Importantly, empathy is more than the simplistic compassion that makes me understand the most hated of society and take them in defence at the risk of being hated myself, and as I've said, that's no big deal for me, although I'd rather be loved. I've always had great compassion for people, ranging from less than normal but surpassing the norm when it comes to the people most like me... and that's why I've always understood such people as narcissists, psychopaths, criminals and Nazis better than my own family and friends. Perhaps if I had lived in the Third Reich, the Jews would have taken the place of the Nazis, but this is the 2000s, but in any case, the Jews, whom I never recall hating, have become increasingly acceptable to me, and I've even been able to get over my homophobia.

(And no, I don't think I'm better off alone anymore. The schizoid personality disorder is what made me think so, and the delusions of completeness and self-sufficiency were shattered at the same time as the delusions of grandeur.)

And interestingly, I never had compassion for the person most like me before, but after my recovery, I've even shed some tears for me, or for the child I was and who was emotionally abused. The physical abuse did little but to harden me... particularly the punch in my solar plexus which taught me that this is the perfect place to hit someone you wish to teach a lesson.

wooster wrote:

sum1 wrote:shorten it to Johann

- or even Jehan (a favourite of mine - shows up a lot at Villon, and while there, Janin (~ Janin l'Avenue, a perfectly immaculate rondeau - even if a bit unwashed). Jehan is an old version of Jean -

Really? I though it was a distinct name of Arab origin, since princess Jehan was a character of one of my favourite episodes of "Mission Impossible" that took place in Hawaii.

wooster wrote:as in Jean-Hubert (who painted Voltaire in a negligée), or Jean-Jacques R.,

Ought you not highlight the Jacques too, or is that not a variation on the same theme?

Anyway, you seem to have a very pronounced fondness for French, which looks like knowledge from my ignorant perspective, although I do, of course, know of things such as "nom de plume", which is what we're using all the time on this and other forums.

By the way, is Villon French too? Is its meaning similar to house or home, which is what the word "Villa" means in Swedish, German, and I presume Spanish? In my dialect, however, the meaning has been perverted so that it means vacation cottage or summer cottage, which I assume the Russians would call a datcha. whereas a new cumbersome term has been invented in my dialect to play the role that Villa usually does (it translates to "own home's house" if you must know).

wooster wrote:or the late, great Jean-Louis Dumas (who appointed Jean-Paul Gaultier - both to be sadly missed); Jean Paul (~ Friedrich Richter), John Paul II (a Polish pope! Sweet Suffering Jaysus!!! And now even a German one!! Where's the world coming to... ), John Dee, John Deer™, John Dillinger, John Wilmot (2nd Earl of Rochester, old bud') and Johnny Depp who once played him; Johnny "vraiment! tu n'est pas an ange" by E. Piaf,

You're using a little too much French here for me to follow, but perhaps that is your grandiose ambition? Perhaps you could translate it for me so that I can incorporate it into my own incomprehensible style of gibberish?

wooster wrote:John "Masada" Zorn (< I think I prefere the Electric Tekufah to the Acoustic Tekufah - and you? Mind you, it changes on a weekly basis); johnny (< Victorian cockney for chamberpot), Jan "Hic Fuit" Van Eyck (not to forget Johan Huizinga of course), Jan Garbarek, Janus the Bipolar,

Are you certain of this? I thought Janus was distinct from the "Johannes"-derived (of course, the original was in Hebrew, and thus cannot be expressed here) names. If I recall correctly, he was the Roman god not of bipolar disorder, but of gateways with one side of his face on either side of it. However, I suppose that can be seen as a form of bipolarity.

wooster wrote:Johann Sebastian Bach indeed (the Deposuit Potentes* (#4 in Magnificat) is crying out loud to be performed on tenorsax - by John Zorn, no less. The bestest Magnificat I owned thus far was with John Eliot Gardiner & The English Baroque Soloists - sadly a jar of pesto broke all over it in the check-in luggage in 2002, that was a right mess. Never came around to replace it since (the pesto I did.). Johnny Rotten, John the Baptist, St. John the Oil-cooked (< came upon that one in some orthodox calendar long ago, don't ask...), Hans Magnus Enzensberger (now, that's a grandioso one),

This is the person I feel most curious about investigating, simply because you say he's a grandiose one. Yes, I actually don't know a lot of the people you mention.

wooster wrote:H-Heini W. (an impoverished ex-creative accountant of my acquaintance who watches much too much soccer for his own good if you ask me), Hans Christian Andersen, Frans Hals (okay, maybe not him..), Ivan the Terrible, John Galliano for Dior, etc. etc. - just to name a few with polite omissions, and haven't even started with the Italians yet. 'Tis a good name.

Giovanni van Bronckhorst, but he's a Dutchman, or what they call the people from the Netherlands, as someone argued that it's not the same as Holland, but Holland was what the commentators called the football team he played for. Oh, and one of the commentators' names was Johanna. She was the prettiest of them, and although she seemed to know more about football than I do, she was not the best analyst, with the exception of one half game which she summarised succinctly as "not the sexiest" of half games so far. As it was one of the most boring, I could not have said it better myself, although of course that may be due to my strange opinion of sex as a boring exercise. Boxing is more fun, and so is football, although I never took part myself, except occasionally as a goal keeper, and it wouldn't surprise me if you could find a few goalies with the kind of name under discussion here.

wooster wrote:"Hedwiga, I do beg of you! Such conduct!"

Magda Goebbels summarised the temperaments of her and Dr. Joseph's children as follows:

Magda once described the temperaments of five of her children to her sister-in-law Eleanore (Ello) Quandt by describing how each would react to learning they had been deceived by their spouse:[9]
Helga - Would seize a revolver and shoot the unfaithful husband out of hand, or at least try to.
Hilde - Would collapse altogether, sobbing and weeping, but would soon appear to be reconciled if her husband expressed remorse and swore to be faithful in future.
Helmut - Would never believe that his wife would deceive him
Holde - Would never quite get over the infidelity, but would be too proud to reproach her husband. Finally, through the breach of confidence on the part of her husband she would go to pieces altogether.
Hedda - On the other hand, would give a peal of laughter and say "Come here you rascal and give me a kiss"

Hedda is a nickname for Hedwig Johanna, and she is the one that comes closest to myself. My next option would be that of Helga.

This Hedwiga of your reminds me of Hedda.

Wikipedia claims that "Hitler was very fond of the children", which I cannot say I usually am of children, because they are so noisy, but I would not kill them after they have been born. That is, however, what their mother Magda did, although she had so sneak away and do it secretly, because Joseph and Adolf would not have allowed it, and Albert Speer had also offered to make arrangement for the escape of Magda and the children from the Führerbunker, and this is the closest I've ever come to crying over anything the Nazis did, even though as I said, I don't generally like children. Her reasoning is perhaps what makes it so alien and difficult to understand for me. She wrote in a letter to an older son, Harald, whom she had with another man:

Magda Goebbels wrote:My beloved son! By now we have been in the Führerbunker for six days already — daddy, your six little siblings and I, for the sake of giving our national socialistic lives the only possible honorable end ... You shall know that I stayed here against daddy's will, and that even on last Sunday the Führer wanted to help me to get out. You know your mother — we have the same blood, for me there was no wavering. Our glorious idea is ruined and with it everything beautiful and marvelous that I have known in my life. The world that comes after the Führer and national socialism is not any longer worth living in and therefore I took the children with me, for they are too good for the life that would follow, and a merciful God will understand me when I will give them the salvation ... The children are wonderful ... there never is a word of complaint nor crying. The impacts are shaking the bunker. The elder kids cover the younger ones, their presence is a blessing and they are making the Führer smile once in a while. May God help that I have the strength to perform the last and hardest. We only have one goal left: loyalty to the Führer even in death. Harald, my dear son — I want to give you what I learned in life: be loyal! Loyal to yourself, loyal to the people and loyal to your country ... Be proud of us and try to keep us in dear memory

Nevertheless, it is also reported that:

Wikipedia on Magda Goebbels wrote:On 9 November 1942, during a gathering with friends listening to a speech by Hitler, she switched off the radio exclaiming, "My God, what a lot of rubbish"

She was some sort of idealist and patriot. She mentions loyalty, which I certainly value more than justice and vengeance, but which I cannot imagine killing anyone I love for, although I might easily kill myself.

wooster wrote:

Characteristics wrote: something better whenever I get any sense of what the hell shading is.

To hell with shading. That's where laypeople get it all wrong, aspiring for "depth" & verisimilitude and all that sh*t - that's where it goes all shallow & sketchy. Just look at Myers' portrait. Awful, innit?

I like shading. It's one of my favourite techniques. The best shades drawings of mine are also the most realistic.

Note that I'm not taking offence or anything, but rather wish to providing some more facts.

Whether or not one wants realism is another question. Hitler loved it, and some of the paintings of especially women that were made by Third Reich artists are some of the most realistic I've ever seen. They were in colour, at a time when photographs came in black and white, so they may have been the most realistic reproduction of reality possible at the time.

Of course, there are others who prefer the weirdness of Picasso and modern art.

Myers wrote:I am still taking a break, but, since you asked me directly... Yes, there were a number of antisocials who were banned from psychforums. I won't say names, but one of them created a forum which many of the others joined. I did have an account there, but I only posted once or twice. From what I hear, it has since been deleted.

It would be nice if you could round some of them up for me. You can send the details in private. These are interesting people... or so I think.

As a matter of fact, I have a fairly long message from a self-professed psychopath that I really ought to reply to, but there are a lot of things that compete for my limited time and attention.

I also had my own forum which I abandoned ages ago. I just didn't have the time or motivation to try to get it up and running. It's still there, but I don't ever get on it. I think the last post was back in June.[/quote]

Here are links to my most interesting posts to your forum:

http://mental.forumotion.net/personality-disorders-f12/narcissistic-schizoid-t52.htm

http://mental.forumotion.net/narcissistic-personality-disorder-f32/mothers-t48.htm#520

http://mental.forumotion.net/narcissistic-personality-disorder-f32/sam-vaknin-t43.htm#518

For your convenience and education, of course. It has nothing to do with me.

ACHTUNG! Note to sensitive souls: contains political incorrectness!

wooster wrote:

sum1 wrote: What do you suggest?

How's about "The Club Of The The Day After The Japanese Shredded The Big Dumb Dane Goliaths To F%cking Pieces"?

Nah, I don't want the name to reflect a focus on Japs and Danes. That would quickly become misleading.

Somehow, what I'll remember most of this World Cup that just ended is how pale and how good the Uruguay players were. Especially the blond and blue-eyed super-Aryan Diego Forlan. I thought he was going to screw up the penalty, as all heroes usually do when it counts the most, but no, he seemed really calm and almost nonchalant... and that's why he made it! Alternatively, it is because he was blonder than me.

But Spain eventually won, and the Germans with that mixture of real Germans, Turks and Brazilians took the bronze from Uruguay. On the other hand, consider that Uruguay has only about 3 million inhabitants, so there must be some sort of... higher quality or something? Or maybe not, but is it not a reasonable working hypothesis?

wooster wrote:(Mind you, I HATE (despise!!) soccer with a fervour - and I have a GOOD valid reason for it...

Yes, as always, we have good reasons when we hate. I'm sure that soccer has destroyed your life... come here so I can comfort you.

wooster wrote:Nevertheless I'm in awe of the vuvuzelas (or vuvuzelæ? What's the plural for that damn' thing??

I think you got it right, but that is my speculation only. It looks intuitive.

However, I think that the vuvuzelas were the most irritating element of the whole World Cup. Of course, I like you nevertheless, because your schadenfreude is kind of natural considering the devastation the sport has caused in your life, and I kind of like schadenfreude anyway, as it yields... SATISFACTION! Who am I do deny you satisfaction? If anything, I want you to have more of it.

wooster wrote:Still it (JP vs. DK) strikes me as somebody's hilarious but cruel - and very un-PC - joke.)

I'm not sure it's particularly... un-PC; it strikes me as a bit of the opposite actually, considering... you know...

And I don't think it was particularly cruel... teams win and lose all the time, and the Danes did a lot better in my opinion, than for example the French or Italians.

Also, the South Africans did a good job organising the whole thing. The legacy of... you know... haha, sorry.

wooster wrote:I'm all up for elite-clubs and workmens' trade-unions & whatnot (RSPCA), so please do sign me up if you may care doing so, will you? Thanks.

I'll keep you in mind. Do you think Sam could be recruited too, or is he a little too sensitive to deal with those of his own kind?

It would be fun to have Obama on board too. They say he's a narcissist. However, he does have a job, unlike me, so I'm not asking him to talk - or type - as much as me.

wooster wrote:(Free drinks?)

Well, actually yes, if you do the travelling, but otherwise only virtual orange juice. Otherwise, you'll have real orange juice; no wait, I ran out of it. It will have to be that Ekström's mixture of mostly strawberries and raspberries (I think), I'm afraid.

Oh, the Horst Wessel Lied that I'm playing in the background? I like the melody in particular, and I find the lyrics somewhat amusing. I'm glad that it's OK to be honest. No wait, it's "La Primavera" by Sash!, and not the HWL. Now.

Someone hacked into my computer and caused two attempts at replying to this to become discarded. Here is the third attempt - I will try to split it into several smaller posts so that the loss is not so substantial if the intruders strike again.

Someone told me between the lines that it would be better to be silent... I don't agree. The great Internet public deserves a chance to listen to my wisdoms, even if most will let these treasures pass them by. That is their choice. To post this is mine. If I don't post this the lack of results is my fault, and if people choose not to listen, it is their fault.

wooster wrote:

LifeSong wrote: I remember that some ASPD/psychopath folks got banned here and decided to start their own forum.

I spent some time reading Lannibal Hecter's prose.

I wasn't going to reply to this originally, but I assume you mean Hannibal Lecter. I'm not familiar with this character, but I know he appeared in some movie. Therefore, I'm somewhat surprised to hear his name mentioned in this context.

wooster wrote:God he was good. I liked Echydna (?) and a few others too...

Echydna? You're kidding right? Or is this some former poster here?

wooster wrote:I like to read your posts too, thank heavens you're not banned yet.

Why would LifeSong be banned? She's too smart in her abuse... it's not forbidden to withhold one's attention, and I do it all the time myself, but it kills as effectively as the vilest name calling. So, if I'm killing someone, please let me know before it's too late. Not because I won't get away with it, but because I don't like killing people except when I have good reasons... for example, if I were in the mode of seeking perhaps the sweetest substance of all, revenge, then killing would be quite satisfying, but in that mode, one normally wants to kill with more active means than silence, and then it is not as easy to get away with it. And by the way, I've forgiven LifeSong a long time ago.

/// ((( killed off the best part of the right handside keyboard by Sangiovese 2006 in a moment of SSrI ind.ced cl.msiness (spilt leftover whisky on it) / back as soon as this malarkey dries .p or gets fixed (thanks heavens for applecare) sho.ldnt have driven .p to Donegal on s.ch a short notice. Will try do with an ersatz *SB keyboard till then (I badly miss the *s and apostrophes and ampersands), back real soon ..

sum1 wrote:

wooster wrote:

LifeSong wrote: I remember that some ASPD/psychopath folks got banned here and decided to start their own forum.

I spent some time reading Lannibal Hecter's prose.

I wasn't going to reply to this originally, but I assume you mean Hannibal Lecter. I'm not familiar with this character, but I know he appeared in some movie. Therefore, I'm somewhat surprised to hear his name mentioned in this context.

wooster wrote:God he was good. I liked Echydna (?) and a few others too...

Echydna? You're kidding right? Or is this some former poster here?

I haven't check this thread of mine in some time, but I put a "notify me" tag on it as it's my thread - now I've read thru. You two have had quite the far-ranging discussion, haven't you? Got bored with SV and took off in other directions. I don't mind. I'm rather bored with him myself. I enjoyed the reading.
sum1, I believe wooster is referring to past posters in the AsPD forum, such as lannibal hector (a play on the Hannibal Lector character). Some of my favorites to read in that forum were sabratha, belladonna, henrietta, echidna, antisthenes, burgerkid and fredinstein... all gone now. Not that I agreed with the content of their posts but they made for interesting reading.

wooster wrote:I like to read your posts too, thank heavens you're not banned yet.

Why would LifeSong be banned? She's too smart in her abuse... it's not forbidden to withhold one's attention, and I do it all the time myself, but it kills as effectively as the vilest name calling. So, if I'm killing someone, please let me know before it's too late. Not because I won't get away with it, but because I don't like killing people except when I have good reasons... for example, if I were in the mode of seeking perhaps the sweetest substance of all, revenge, then killing would be quite satisfying, but in that mode, one normally wants to kill with more active means than silence, and then it is not as easy to get away with it. And by the way, I've forgiven LifeSong a long time ago.

I can’t foresee me being banned; I’m not here to do damage or to use others for my own benefit. But thanks for the sentiment, wooster.
Not giving attention in instances where one is being baited to engage in fighting or idle argumentation isn’t abusive – it’s preventative. I’m glad you’ve forgiven me, sum1. I’m glad we’re good again.

wooster wrote:/// ((( killed off the best part of the right handside keyboard by Sangiovese 2006 in a moment of SSrI ind.ced cl.msiness (spilt leftover whisky on it) / back as soon as this malarkey dries .p or gets fixed (thanks heavens for applecare) sho.ldnt have driven .p to Donegal on s.ch a short notice. Will try do with an ersatz *SB keyboard till then (I badly miss the *s and apostrophes and ampersands), back real soon ..

I see your "u" is dead. This happened to me a couple days ago where my "v" died. Then, the next day, just as I was planning to go out to buy a new keyboard, it began to work again. Was it just that I'd dropped a drop of port on it the night before? Truly, did it just need to dry out?
And what is applecare?