Are narcs easy to manipulate?

xdude wrote:My 90 degree view is but why manipulate them? For what purpose? What would anyone get out of it? A 'haha I win' moment?

It's not like it's going to teach the person with NPD a lesson where they go 'oh wow now I see clearly, I am over my NPD'. More likely the manipulator just ends up hurting themselves to go down this path.

Other people are to the narcissist like their body part. Only you exist in your mind. Imagine wanting to move your arm, and it didnt move. Thats the way a narcissist feels, when another person doesnt do what they want. You need supply, and thats the only reason you do things, the only thing thats important.So you have to manipulate to get it.

AProphet wrote:Other people are to the narcissist like their body part. Only you exist in your mind. Imagine wanting to move your arm, and it didnt move. Thats the way a narcissist feels, when another person doesnt do what they want. You need supply, and thats the only reason you do things, the only thing thats important.So you have to manipulate to get it.

Yea, that's cool, but even if someone can manipulate a narcissist, I don't see the point in doing so.

Okay I suppose it's possible to do so, the good old 'flattery will get you everywhere', but the NPD types I know would eventually see through it, grow bored, find new supply, etc. Oh sure, they might allow it continue, even enjoy it, you might even get somewhat better treatment in return, but that doesn't mean the person with NPD is blind to self-interest in others.

AProphet wrote:

Squaredonutwheels wrote:

AProphet wrote:As invert, I was the one manipulating others, into abusing me. Its insanity.

It's interesting that you realized this.
What was the catalyst for such a realization?
Was there a specific event or did someone tell you?

Its in the other thread. I fell in love. I saw myself threw the eyes of another, was able to empathize.

Reading that thread was like looking into a spiral.
Around and around. My eyes are crossed now. I don't intend that as an insult btw.
I tried to read every word to try empathize and it was like a spiral spiral spiral.

Is it helping you to type up how you feel?

I recently tried doing that but I'm not sure if it was useful or not. Maybe in time I'll know.

Squaredonutwheels wrote:
Reading that thread was like looking into a spiral.
Around and around. My eyes are crossed now. I don't intend that as an insult btw.
I tried to read every word to try empathize and it was like a spiral spiral spiral.

Is it helping you to type up how you feel?

I recently tried doing that but I'm not sure if it was useful or not. Maybe in time I'll know.

Theres always a different angle to the spiral. It didnt spiral out of control I hope.

Yes. Becouse I was lonely. I never got to say the things I wanted to say to the one I loved. Threw no fault of my own. Taken away from me so unfairly. When I was everything she wanted. And I have to sit here being bored and thinking of what we had. So yes writing does release that a bit.

By other narcs, for sure. Having surrounded myself with people on the spectrum, out of the sourch of as having subconsciously looked for a strong parent figure, I can vouch for this. I am easy to manipulate by tham but that´s when I let my BPD self override my rationality. Lately that´s been often because I am on the far end of regressing back to an older self from my teenage years.

The $#%^ part is that around neurotypicals, I am the one to manipulate, even if doing it half unaware.

There was somewhere that I read up on the disorder that predicted that those with NPD are often quite naive and that might get them in trouble. This childlike sense of wanting to trust anyone and everyone (I equate it to looking for a parental figure) might also make them suspectible to be used by true sociopaths. This actually happened to me. A guy I came to know who is on the spectrum I found to be extremely relatable and very admirable due to his strength, people skills and know-how, quickly taking to him as one my best friends. In hindsight after I started living together and by proxy mirroring him, that´s when my life actually took a turn for the worse. Can´t blame my unravelling on him thoguh, it just felt like it snowballed out of control but it was deemed to happen. Narcissists are sure-fire victims to the rules of entropy.

Now that I´ve known him longer, I kind of know how he operates but sociopaths are way more cunning. It is extremely difficult for me to follow him, as he seems to always hold in view a long-term plan, as opposed to me who only operates on an immediate level.

Most pwNPD´s are in a sense sociopaths as well but there is way less counscious awarness of manipulation as it pertains to narcissists. NPD 101 here but as when a narcissists does it mainly for admiration and acceptance, sociopaths do it predominantly for power and influence over others. PwNPD don´t tend to plan a lot out and if we do, that´s a turn toward the ASPD spectrum. Sadly I came to know this first-hand.

SelfSerf wrote:There was somewhere that I read up on the disorder that predicted that those with NPD are often quite naive and that might get them in trouble. This childlike sense of wanting to trust anyone and everyone (I equate it to looking for a parental figure) might also make them suspectible to be used by true sociopaths.

Do you recall where you read that? My therapist said something similar at one point, although I can't recall the context. I had a boss once who I believe was a sociopath and she knew exactly how to f*ck with my head. I had to work hard not to react but it was seriously unsettling.

SelfSerf wrote:By other narcs, for sure. Having surrounded myself with people on the spectrum, out of the sourch of as having subconsciously looked for a strong parent figure, I can vouch for this. I am easy to manipulate by tham but that´s when I let my BPD self override my rationality. Lately that´s been often because I am on the far end of regressing back to an older self from my teenage years.

I don't think I'm particularly trusting or easy to manipulate, but the times when I've let someone have that kind of power over me, it's been other pwNPD (I strongly suspect, anyway).

Really depends on the individual I would say. My experience with highly manipulative people is they end up causing just as many problems for themselves as they do other people, and they don’t seem to be capable of putting 2 and 2 together that they are causing their own problems

ZeroZ wrote:Really depends on the individual I would say. My experience with highly manipulative people is they end up causing just as many problems for themselves as they do other people, and they don’t seem to be capable of putting 2 and 2 together that they are causing their own problems

I agree, it really depends on the individual, and yes, manipulation is in most cases causing trouble to all parties involved. By the way are you a psychologist or something?

Yes, DR. Z. Pleased to meet you

Btw, that weird smiley face in your avatar really freaks me out