Options once you've been discovered

My reputation in the community is at an all time low from word of mouth. My narcissistic traits have become apparent and gossip has destroyed my reputation. I have been confronted on my lack of empathy three times, but these encounters are now completely denied by the others involved. This has caused me a great deal of anxiety and started a depressed spiral. However whenever I ask someone directly to try and confirm my wrongdoings, it is dismissed as paranoia. Members of the community and friends alike discuss my lack of self-awareness and how I am beyond reformation right in front of me, but continue to tell me I'm not doing anything wrong when I ask for reassurance. I believe I am aware of these traits, but feel I need confirmation to fully accept these flaws. This cycle of gaslighting is just making me angrier and keeps me oscillating between denial and guilt.

So under the assumption that I am currently toxic, I wonder what can a narcissist do once they have been exposed for what they are? What are my options after becoming infamous in my community and assumed to be a lost cause?

You remind me of a paranoid [with possible ASD] who was here a longer time ago. I dont have the patience anymore, so I'm gonna make this short ->
If you have paranoia you should get professional help, because it can worsen over time and develop into something even harder to treat. If you actually would have trouble with empathic functioning that can be caused by a lot of things, most of which are not under yoru control unless you work on it in therapy; so its the symptom of an illness and if others cant accept that, they can go ###$ themselves.

" I have been confronted on my lack of empathy three times, but these encounters are now completely denied by the others involved."

Just to be clear here, what do you mean by "the others involved"? Do you mean the actual ppl who have confronted you about your lack of empathy or witnesses who saw/heard others say that about you?

"Members of the community and friends alike discuss my lack of self-awareness and how I am beyond reformation right in front of me, but continue to tell me I'm not doing anything wrong when I ask for reassurance."

What kind of reassurance are you seeking? Reassurance that you lack self-awareness/ cannot be reformed or did nothing wrong? It's kind of an oxymoron, when you are actually self-aware or you wouldn't be here on this forum. Paranoia indeed.

Most people just think you are a jerk.

Either they will stop talking to you or keep talking to you.

Your options are to pretend you are sorry and play nice or walk away. It shouldn't bother you if people think you are a jerk, it probably would make you feel good.

"It shouldn't bother you if people think you are a jerk, it probably would make you feel good."

Does it? Have you ever questioned how ppl thinking you're a jerk can make you feel good, seriously?

realityhere wrote:"It shouldn't bother you if people think you are a jerk, it probably would make you feel good."

Does it? Have you ever questioned how ppl thinking you're a jerk can make you feel good, seriously?

Well from what I have read about narcissists, most are happy with it and don't care if people think you are a jerk. Just as long as you can impress the people you need to impress.

I'm BPD and I don't give a crap if people think I'm a crappy person. Some thinking I'm a bi#ch is great. They stay away. And don't annoy me.

A true Narcissist enjoys hurting others. If you truly are a Narcissist, you should be proud that everyone is against you.

If you feel guilt that the community is against you, then you should ask this question in the depression forum.

BadShrimp wrote:A true Narcissist enjoys hurting others. If you truly are a Narcissist, you should be proud that everyone is against you.

If you feel guilt that the community is against you, then you should ask this question in the depression forum.

https://youtu.be/jV1knP5-K1o

BadShrimp wrote:A true Narcissist enjoys hurting others.

You’re confusing a narcissist with a sadist. Despite popular belief, these are not the same.