Difference between narcissism and NPD?

lilyfairy wrote:The thing is that online, we can't verify anyone's qualifications. It's an anonymous forum, and even if it were not anonymous, we still would not be able to verify that someone is who they say they are, and what qualifications they have to make assessments - anyone could be hiding behind a keyboard.

That makes sense of it. I suppose a forum would have to have some of its staff as professionals to be able get around that one.

lilyfairy wrote:The colloquial type information in stickies- not all stickies have been deliberately written as informational threads about a disorder. Sometimes they've just been threads that various people have contributed to which have explained something about the disorder really well, or have been something that needs to stay at the top of the forum, like a commonly used thread or something important about that particular subforum. Not all stickies have been written by mods either. The ones with purple names are former mods, and most of the orange ones are just regular users. There's a few former mods who have chosen to go back to being an orange user, but the majority of former mods names are in purple.

The only "formal" information in those threads is usually about diagnostic criteria for a disorder, which can also readily be found online.

Thanks for explaining that. Did the forum shut down for a while or change in some other way? It's quite quiet. Not that that it is a bad thing if people who were using it don't need it.

Yes, I figure there's probably a lot of information online if you look in the right places, its just finding it.

lilyfairy wrote:

user1357911 wrote:Offline, I find all the professionals I know really intimidating, as if they're about to slap a great big long section on you - for the wrong thing - they're the last people I would ask about psychology or psychiatry despite their qualifications... which is a shame, I know it is only the ones I know in person.

They're not all like that. It's taken me a while to find them, but ones without that attitude do exist.

Thanks, I'll bear that in mind. But its so much nicer when you can be in a situation where you can walk into a professional's office if you want to, but do not have to.

lilyfairy wrote:

user1357911 wrote:Thanks for explaining that. Did the forum shut down for a while or change in some other way? It's quite quiet. Not that that it is a bad thing if people who were using it don't need it.

It's quieter than it used to be. It seems there are a lot of people who are quite happy to share everything about themselves and their issues with the world on social media these days. Personally, I'd rather not tell the world that much about me.

Yes the topics seem a bit private for social media.

lilyfairy wrote:

user1357911 wrote:Thanks, I'll bear that in mind. But its so much nicer when you can be in a situation where you can walk into a professional's office if you want to, but do not have to.

I found asking for recommendations helpful- I have asked my own GP, a doctor I knew through my work (non-medical field)at a time when I had a GP who was totally unhelpful, other people I know who have their own stuff going on. Also my previous therapist during my last session with him- I chose to finish with him because he was no longer helpful- he mentioned some people who he thought would be a good match for me, and also people who he thought would definitely not be a good match for me. Doing it while I was at the lower end of moderately well rather than crisis mode was a good thing.

That's not such a bad idea, but I have one of those GP surgeries where its a different person each time and I've hardly ever been near it. I did get a recommendation but the psychiatrist was about to leave. To tell the truth I'd really rather not see anyone. Though I wouldn't pass up on the sort of information a good psychologist can give.

I have understood that narcissists are self absorbed, concerned only about themselves and their own happiness.

In retrospect, I have been self absorbed most of my life, trying to figure out what was wrong with me, wondering why I was teased so much (bullied?) in school, failed at so many relationships, struggled with jobs, spending hours and sleepless nights wondering what I'd done wrong, how I could do better. I felt so flawed, with nothing of value to give, I hardly ever thought of others....what they needed, what they wanted, what I could do to help. I was self absorbed.....just trying to get by. I don't think that was narcissistic self absorption. I now wonder if I am on the Autism spectrum.

Mental illnesses and personality disorders are so complex. Sometimes they are about faulty wiring, and sometimes they are about adaptation to life's cruel realities. I think it's hard for professionals to tell the difference. We are categorized based on self-reported symptoms. They rely on DSM-V classifications, and do the best they can. Often, they err, and sometimes they prescribe meds based on their "best guess". They try to help but they have limitations.

About 15 years ago, I was receiving medication for depression, "monitored" by a psychiatrist during monthly 15 minute appointments. A friend had idly suggested I might be bi-polar, so I told the psychiatrist at my next appointment. He prescribed meds for bi-polar illness......based only on my friend's suggestion.

Diagnoses are great and helpful in some situations, specifically around receiving disability benefits. I've been diagnosed with so many things, I probably could have qualified. But I figured I'd earn more if I worked, and never pursued disability benefits. Maybe I should have. Now I'm retired, barely getting by, but SO grateful I have SS and don't have to deal with people and work.

Sorry for rambling. I participated in this forum years ago, in the Depression group. I was in touch with Doug, and Barb outside the forum, and have lost touch. Doug has passed away, sadly. I hope Barb sees this. Mental illness sucks, but the friends we make here help us get through.

Welcome back! a lot has happened in so many years, but welcome back!