I'm doing better, and I don't care what my mom says!

I wanted to ask you guys about the significant people in your lives who have a need for you to be sick. Right now I'm the least sick. I'm actually not sick. I'm doing great. I may have a boil on my leg but that's healing fast. So I'm off to doctor to get more skin creams next week. I'm about ready to start a part-time job should that manifest.

I'm in short, doing fabulously well. Mom's need for me to be sick is not influencing me. In fact, it is something that I'm ignoring by not letting her discuss my health with me. I'm still chunky though, I have to lose weight so I'm going to class at the Y. I'm trying to walk more, work out more, and try to lose weight. My stomach problem may mean that my body has trouble digesting so I bloat. I use metamucil to counteract this. I have my methods.

Cheese is not great for me but it has the habit of leveling my blood sugar. I'm eating a whole foods diet with mom helping me out with that one at least. I'm really careful what I put into my body. I mean she really has nothing to complain about. I'm reading a whole book about borderline personality disorder. I'm striving to take my meds. I'm working on devising a plan to lose weight. The plan involves not pushing myself too hard but definitely cross training. I think I'm on my way to success and I will not listen to negative martyr talk from my mother about how I need to lose weight, whine, whine whine. I'm not listening. I'm doing this my way.

This is really positive to hear. It sounds like you are really taking your life back which is such a good thing. Keep going with it and with the weight just take it a bit at a time. You can do it and you sound like you are in a really good place.

Hugs

Cracked

Well done you!

I lost 30% of my body weight last year. Unsurprisingly, I managed to start the weight loss around the time when I severed contact with my family, and found it went quite easily. I was on a large forum for weight loss, and there are two main useful bits of info I can pass along from there:

1) A huge number of women there were dealing with some sort of abuse issues, whether it was emotionally abusive family, domestic violence, workplace bullying or what have you. There were mother issues up the wazoo. There were huge numbers of people dealing with diet saboteurs, usually other women, most often their mothers. I was far from being the only one who found that the main key to successful weight loss was severing an abusive mother-daughter relationship. So I would suggest that you keep your mother completely out of your weight loss. Don't tell her a thing about it, don't ask for advice, shut down the conversation if she opens it. She may try to make herself sound supportive, but remember that your mother's priority is to make you ill.

2) The book "Thin for Life" is excellent, and I strongly recommend following its precepts. Not its food recommendations quite as much, it's so busy coaxing people out of high-fat diets that it fails to bother with the dangers of sugar, but it talks about the essential components of successful weight loss, such as having solid support around you, logging what you eat, weighing yourself, how to deal with various issues. I pretty much picked all of this up from the forum, so that by the time I bought the book it was stuff I knew already, which also shows you that the forum is fairly sound. It's 3 Fat Chicks if you're curious, and it's friendly towards all sorts of dieting methods (well, the sane ones) as well as people with health problems.

Your post is very positive and inspiring, FreakofNature!

But yes, I understand where you're coming from with your mom needing you to be ill. It's more common than most people think. Good on you for standing up to it and maintaining that you are choosing a healthier lifestyle for your own benefit. Your mom will either try to lure you in again or give up and choose someone else to be her target. If this happens please remember that it's not your fault that someone else is suffering because of her - it's your mom's fault.

Very inspiring post. Thanks for sharing. I really appreciate these kinds of healthy post.