hi

Hi, just joined and have been looking around. Not sure where i would go here. Not much to introduce with but: Been playing primarily violin for the past 15 years or so and a general low end artist with writing music and drawing. Not really sure what else to mention (first time in a forum). A friend asked me to join and to ask some questions so here goes.

For the past several years its been pretty managable but lately things have been going on. Episodes are tighter together and ive noticed alot more isolation but most of me somehow wants it. That part is easy to deal but wondering if anyone here could lend some wisdom about the annoying stuff.

Well... what's your mental illness?

I'm Borderline Personality and Bipolar...
That's like being double crazy. It rocks.
::giggle::giggle::

We hafta know what's wrong with you so the right people can relate to you.

Sorry about that. Never been able to go to a doctor about it. Closest thing was a councilor who thought it was "acting out" and family who thought i was lying.

Mainly hearing and feeling things that dont seem to be there then after a few days i stop sleeping for periods of time. Nothing too much just 2-4 days at a time. I used to believe i knew what they were but honestly, nowadays those explainations and thoughts just seem childish.

It feels like every month i lose more control as it waves together closer but atleast i stopped cutting(still dont know how i stopped that). Its becoming more frustrating to try to stop it from messing up the few people i have around.

I dunno. That's all pretty vague information...
Maybe someone else has an idea.

Okay, so to give you a brief reply:

Hearing and feeling things that don't seem to be there: schizophrenia, psychosis, manic stage of bipolar disorder, to name a few causes.

Loss of sleep: common to many psychiatric disorders. However disturbing it might be, it's such an ordinary symptom that listing it doesn't help much.

Danger sign: crisis becoming more powerful and closer in-between - probably, disorder increasing in severity. Growing need for isolation, meaning you are unable to deal with the outside world properly.

Gather your wits, man. Time to go see a doctor. No need to suffer until you can't stand it anymore and have to go anyway, right? If it's getting worse, stop it before it gets really bad.

Sorry about abscense, internet was out for a while.

Thanks for the scary but helpful information. Trying to find a doctor at the moment. No insurance and minute income not helping but some past stuff on record might.

Does not feel good, most people i know are starting families, overcoming massive drug addictions or building a good future and here i am. If it were not for a few people reminding me to eat or sleep half the time im not sure where i would be. Don't get me wrong, have not been suicidal in months and dont plan on going back. Hell, have not even cut myself in a while (proud of that since i used to do that ALOT).

Finding help is not going to be like the last times i tried (which is to say total failure) because i cant let it.

Was able to check out a few free clinics. No real luck in that department, but a place for free std tests has been found. So im going to call today some small victory. Time for victory ramen.