Newb

Hello, Im new here just found the site surfing the net.

I have come to the realization I have a paranoid personality dissorder. I recognized it fore sure just a couple days ago and I thought I would seek advice as to what to do next? My friends and family all know but to what degree I dont know. Its true what I read that the disease feeds itself because what was once a shaky foundation of a beleif that I have this dissorder has slowly became more concrete. (pardon the pun but it worked)

So here I am, amidst other people that have had or do have the same problem, right? I hope so because forums can sometime release trolls that are not to kind to people looking for help. back off troll!

So anyways I am currently taking wellbutrin @ 300 mg per day. I also take Abilify 2mg per day. I have been taking this combination for 2 months after seeing a doctor for what I thought was depression. I have never talked to anyone about the possibilies of having a paranoid personality because I simply didnt think that was me. Reading a clear definition of the disease was like looking at myself in the mirror. It just fit.

Would this be considered acceptable standards for diagnosing yourself? just reading a definition? Im thinking it does at least for me because I have always wondered what was wrong with me and wasnt able to put peices together about my self-aware behavior I portray to people. I cannot help it though no matter how much I try I just dont trust people, Im brash and I try to find an underlining meaning in everything instead of just taking things for face value. I recognized I did this but to see all of what I do in a typical relationship condensed into I definition of a dissorder is really making me a beleiver.

Ramble ramble.. ok so if anyone wants to be a friend and help a fellow out here I am.

hello,

I dont think it is wrong to read a definition of something and identify with it. You can share this with a therapist or pdoctor,
and then they can talk to you and get a diagnosis.

if you havent had any therapy, and you think that being paranoid is affecting your life in a negative way. you might need to go a few times. See if it helps.

and no mean trolls dont last. There are alot of friendly people here.

Thank you, thats encouraging news about the trolls.. I play online gaming and the forums there can get out of control.

Yes I have had therapy before but it wasnt in relation to a sickness. I just needed to talk to someone about getting closer things. She never diagnosed me or anything. This paranoid personality dissorder that I beleive I now have has been like a puzzle with missing peices. I always knew there was "something" wrong with me and my behavior but there wasn't enough peices of the puzzle to see what it was. Lately Ive put in a few more peices in my puzzle and Im seeing the picture. It was like an enlightening moment realizing I do indeed have this problem. So you think therapy is next?
I have been in the system before and I know what not to say to doctors. I voluntarily went to a 72 hour clinic to get help on the same issue I saw the therapist before. They just treated me like a number and gave me a dixie cup with pills, sent me on my way.

I dont mind therapy but not at the county level. Group therapy you think would be best?

hey welcome to the forum i also believe i may have ppd and have spent time on gaming forums .p if you ever want to talk feel free to pm me.

Alexingburg wrote:Thank you, thats encouraging news about the trolls.. I play online gaming and the forums there can get out of control.

Yes I have had therapy before but it wasnt in relation to a sickness. I just needed to talk to someone about getting closer things. She never diagnosed me or anything. This paranoid personality dissorder that I beleive I now have has been like a puzzle with missing peices. I always knew there was "something" wrong with me and my behavior but there wasn't enough peices of the puzzle to see what it was. Lately Ive put in a few more peices in my puzzle and Im seeing the picture. It was like an enlightening moment realizing I do indeed have this problem. So you think therapy is next?
I have been in the system before and I know what not to say to doctors. I voluntarily went to a 72 hour clinic to get help on the same issue I saw the therapist before. They just treated me like a number and gave me a dixie cup with pills, sent me on my way.

I dont mind therapy but not at the county level. Group therapy you think would be best?

A.,
If you are willing to go to group therapy and have a chance to, then go. Group therapy can be helpful in the changing and sharing behaviors, plus feedback. good luck!

red

Ill have to look into that. Since I posted this I have done some thinking and although I've been having a few "good" days I dont want to forget about it. Seems that is my routine. Im fine then I have a sort of "spell" where Im not for a good 3 or more days.. I usually just wait for it to subside so I can feel better about myself but I'm really tired of doing this.
My paranoia isn't about someone trying to get me in a negative way or someone is out to get me. It's more like everyone see's the same thing in me and they are sort of in it together to push me in a direction of help. Is it possible my friends and family are aware of my odd behavior and they are in fact coordinating something behind my back? I really dont know but when I fall under this "paranoia spell" I beleive they are. I cannot help it either, its out of my control to think differently at the time.
If they are trying to help me thats fine but just the thought of a coordination about my well being behind my back disturbs me. Paranoia feeds on itself because of the unknown. Did they say this or that? Did they do this or that? I really dont know but I see the feeding of the disease point blank now and intend on doing something about it.
Anyone know if Kaiser has group therapy along these lines?

Thanks