Stumped

Hi everyone.

A friend of mine never said it with words, but she has an air about her that says she believes everything she has ever said or done is perfect. But she obviously thinks others are very imperfect because she criticizes people for things she perceives that they did wrong through the years, including innocent things that she believes were direct offenses against her.

It took many years for her to put herself through college, and now has a very good job and large, expensive house. She criticizes people who have help on the ladder of success because they didn't pull themselves up by their own bootstraps, as she did. It is also obvious that she believes everyone should be like her, going to college, finding a high-paying job and desiring a big, fancy home. But she is the only person I know who desires any of those things.

She gives people unsolicited advice on touchy subjects such as how they should raise their kids

It seems like she unleashes her attacks against one person at a time, calling and badgering them - daily adding new things to the list of stuff she believes they did wrong against her. When she is concentrated on you or someone you love, it is so upsetting and devastating. You're always frustrated and often extremely angry with her. Once you can't take it any more and blow up at her, she usually moves on to devastate her next victim.

Does she have Avoidant Personality Disorder or is this something else?

Please excuse the double post. I believe I found the answer to my question. I remembered that in the 1950's or 60's I heard about something called a God complex, so I looked it up, and sure enough, that describes my friend exactly. I wonder what they call the God Complex these days.

It sounds like cluster B traits, but we cant diagnose here. I would suggest you just distance yourself instead of trying to figure out whats wrong with her.

Sounds like narcissism. It doesn't have to be a disorder. Some people are "stable" narcissists. Narcissism is healthy at some level. "Stables" can be annoyingly narcissistic. Pathological/disordered N is more of a pattern that objectifies and hurts others, and denial about it.