by Crayz » Thu Apr 22, 2010 2:40 am
I was told 25mg the first week, 50mg the second week, and have found steadiness with 75mg, currently at my third week, soon to start my fourth. 75mg doesn't make me happy or 'normal' by all means, but it keeps me intact with my disorders. I accept who I am, and do not plan on changing who I am anytime soon. The main thing I am worried about is my social anxiety, which seems to be unrelated to my bipolar. As long as my manic depression and major uncontrollable mood swings aren't nearly as severe as they were before I began my meds, I'm alright.
My original purpose of using these medications was to have a steady life from around April 01 up until April 17, the date of my senior year prom. I had a cute date, and didn't want to fall into some terrible state caused by a single trigger, so I figured I'd fix myself. At the moment I'm still a bit unstable, but it is manageable and doesn't drag throughout the days. My 'hopeless' feelings and having no joy in anything are still present in my lesser states, but again, manageable. The reason I continue past prom is because I realize that I can control myself now, and it feels so much greater. I do not plan on continuing these meds for long-term purpose, though, as I would like to experience with my original mind some more.
I have not noticed any side affects nor any rashing.