Fear of people is ruining my life

I am scared to get a job because I'll have to deal with coworkers & mean bosses. The mere thought makes me wig out. I don't do anything at my school except attend classes because I am such an outcast. This semester two of my classes are online so I won't have to attend class but Tuesday & Thursday. I have gone a full week without saying anything to anyone. I fear that I will leave college with a degree but no social skills, which will block me from employment. A degree is useless without a "personality". I can't work in groups & I think I may have a disability. DISABLED.

I posted this in livejournal. I have no idea what I can do. Can I be declared disabled?

Maybe you should try to figure out why you're so fearful and what's the worst that could possibly happen.

Seems as though you're at you're worst right now and that is irrational fear.

Yes..you could...and,

No...

You have gone through BAd Bosses and Bad coworkers...

I know that so well!

You seem to be afraid of the fact that you might be disabled?


Listen closely...Diabled or not..you are still yourself...

What makes a disability...

It's many things...

First...it is the understanding that you might have problems keeping a job from those anxieties.
1. Bosses..there job is to make you the best employee you can be...even if you give everything at once...that's a problem...give them all and they want more...while you see others just lying around and don't care.
2. Those employess get jeasaous and you are in trouble...because...they go to the top and make stuff up to make you look bad.

That is what happened to me. Parania?

As I was critized by my Supervisor and told not to help retail customers for everthing they need to know is on the back label...for helping a man for 1/2 hour making outlines and working one on one to help this man...put in something in his tiolet that meant talking things apart? I was thrown with this.

The CEO of company...who sat at the top and never came down...

I went to office..to make copy of somwthing and a written note was addressed to the CWEO..who new his Father wqho started the business... I was commended as being one of best employees in the firm for I REALLY took the time to help him.

Same situation.

THe problwem.

The CEO stayed in his office with all the office workers parading my success....when down below...a lazy...persecutor...who was jealous of me for I worked hard and took 3 people at once..which he "conveniently", never knew...

This problem was going on so much...I couldn't take it with OCD and Depression from Devorce...I left!

SSDI...And I was disabled...

What I am saying is lifde is not fair and if you have extreme anxiety from coworkers....you might be disabled.

Let's define that...very well.

Take a person that lost 5 people in two months in there family and went into a psyche hospital and went out and is working.

They are disabled.

Take a young teen girl who lost her first love and became suicidal and was there at the same time...and is having problems....or a man/women who looses a spouse from devorce and is released and is put on SSI for depression from a situation she can't find answers yet...unless she talks to people.

Who is disabled.

The later is disabled..even, though, the first had so many lives lost...

Society makes the judgement on SSDI, SSSI or anything?

It's based on stanima...how much of this pathetic life can you take? Some can take a lot and some much less.

Either way...you can't compare...for it's based on stanima not situations.

So, if you have to go on disability...you better... because it will be hard to keep ends meet...if not...

Each year..they'll be checking you to see if you can work?

So disability can be something that is a part of your life and gone?

If you go SSI or SSDI, you will be "judged by a pyschiatrist". With your fear of bosses and workers...I have it to...so they look into why you have that...counselors and those things..."

It appears to me that you might have an OCD or Geralized Anxiety problem...

One thing is apparent? You are anxious! You are paranoid of bosses and coworkers.

So I am OCD with Anxiety..generalized and depression with parania...welcome to the club...this is perfect place for you to bring thoughts in.

The most important thing I want to say is that you are not abnormal...you are just like me?

I happen tobe under stanima level for society...and the society is...I DON'T BLAME YOU!

Try not to blame yourself...

You can work..or find SSDI or whatever1 Everone here will tell you one thing.

Your just a person going through a cruel world and this is what happens. The worst..keep trying till you get so physically sick from anxiety that you can't work...get those SSDI papers...

We can help you with that!

No matter what...you are still a person.

Go to anxiety sites...OCD...Social anxiety...Generalised Axiety...or any anxiety forum..and say...I'm trouble...

That's what we are here for...

THe people you meet will tell you stuff similar and show you ...YOU ARE NOT ALONE!

But, you must decide your course of action...SSDI...or keep working.

I have no idea if you can keep working? I just see sdimilarities..that's why I am suggesting theser places...

Either way...you are person..always a person..and human...and in no way are you inferior in ANY WAY>

You'll find that out very quick!

Let me know..or us what's going on...you are in the right place at the right time....

In fact you are ahead of the game...

We'll do what we can!


Entangled

"There is no greater weakness than the fear of appearing weak." "The only thing to fear__is fear itself." "You make your own destiny."by:NothingFace

The greatest fear..is fear itself.

Yes.

So? What do we do?

Anxiety...what do others do?

They "Shrug it off there shoulder and don't worry."

Excellent...why am I different...is there a drug for that?

You are having a mid-tern=m exam! You slept through the class for it was early and there was more important areas...boyfriends...other courses...life in general.

Now...you are like, "If I don't lern a whole course in 6 hours...for it's 1:AM and I need to take it. It's multiple choice..true and false..and written! First stuff easy and the rest hard.

It's one of those stupi courses that is inbetween. The good grade counts and you need it!

How are you going to feel...anxious? can I do it? can I learn a course in 6 hours..5 hours, for the ladies..for they need to get ready?

OCD is on the menu...Obsessive...compulsive...HOw?

A person like this sees life like that test!...you have to ace it or everything will go wrong. Obsessive worrying.

Many people don't even have ritual to keep the anxiety away.

It works like this.

You are working and you are l;oved by the owners of business. you work hard...take pride in what you do and the business.

But, the manager takes flack of all the people who sit and, are good, but, are jouleous of your ability to help three people at once and get ...letters and acccomidations of excellence...until...

They, conspire behind your back...and find little things wrong.

The manager is about to sack you. The owner loves you..but, never comes down to see the real "world" of his business. What goes on in OCD mind?

OCD worriers..will see this right away!

We all need to know our past to improve ourselves for the future. But, we go to far.

We look at the present: I have a manager who can sack me at a glance..., with an owner, that doesn't even know what's happening.

We look the past: We tried our best and it ws not good enough.

We look at the possible future: We are homeless with al ot problems that are painful. OCD sufferers don't like pain!

Now, do this over and over again..throughout your life..and it excellerates.

You wake up and you are nervous and feeling sick from anxiety, because of one thing. Thoughts travel so fast you never realise you are thinking them...

For ever penny of thoughts an OCD sufferer has... you would millionaire!

You don't "think"! You are feeling sick and hopeless and your life is on the line!

Welcome to the world of OCD worrying!

Yikes

I once had an employee with a similar problem. Once she'd gotten to know me and make friends with her coworkers, she admitted that she threw up before coming to work on her first day b/c she was so nervous.

But the point is, she came and she got to know all of us. I was a nice boss (she sent me a card to thank me when she moved away so I don't think I'm making that up), and the friends she made while working there will be with her for life.

My humble suggestion is that you see a psychiatrist about it. She may be able to prescribe something to alleviate the symptoms while you talk through it and learn to turn it around on your own if that's a possibility. A lot of people don't like shrinks much, but talking about things, saying them out loud, reduces the power they have over us. Find someone you like--audition them. You CAN make it work! Who knows--maybe you'll find a great job and work for great people. That's possible, too.

chickadee wrote:I once had an employee with a similar problem. Once she'd gotten to know me and make friends with her coworkers, she admitted that she threw up before coming to work on her first day b/c she was so nervous.

But the point is, she came and she got to know all of us. I was a nice boss (she sent me a card to thank me when she moved away so I don't think I'm making that up), and the friends she made while working there will be with her for life.

My humble suggestion is that you see a psychiatrist about it. She may be able to prescribe something to alleviate the symptoms while you talk through it and learn to turn it around on your own if that's a possibility. A lot of people don't like shrinks much, but talking about things, saying them out loud, reduces the power they have over us. Find someone you like--audition them. You CAN make it work! Who knows--maybe you'll find a great job and work for great people. That's possible, too.

Can't argue with that? Meds can help!

If you are like me and throw up before work...or become so exhausted...you can't seem to make it...what's up!

I was boss? Once? Everyone wanted to work when I did..not because they got away from working? I worked with them...just like them. I'd stop and check how they were doing.

If they were slow..."I'd talk to them!" Oh? Fine...I'd do both works and be manager and take flack and all.

We had a record breaking day within the week! Just me and my excellent teens!

But, I was responsible...because shorthandedness to be in paints and could not get to the evening instructions from the Department Manager.

I was Assistant Manager and, the store was mine, and had no time for stock or anything!

She got pissed and complained above my head.

This boss was typical... the faster you work...the faster you can go! He was trying to impress his Father...The CEO!

Do great for the store..get killed by an employee because she doesn't recognize what I had to do for that day?

Chickadee?

Want to go into business...CEO and me Vice Presendent...watching all employee's for what they CAN do and what they can't and make it work?

Yeh...I know fantasy? ...Nice one though?

Cool!!!!!!

(Will call up Erouniess and he can be manager!) We need good employee's!

I'm a 54-year old male..lifelong severe avoidance and dysthymia with major depressive episodes. YOU ARE STILL YOUNG (I think) and it's good that you realize these things NOW. I didn't even become AWARE of the facts of MY situation until I was in my late 30's. My recommendations to you:

Stay close to, concentrate on, and EXCEL in those interests and loves you now have. DO NOT PANIC. DON'T abandon any of your talents and what your heart really likes to do. Someone mentioned people have different levels of "stamina" and THAT is true !! For example, many of my past co-workers and bosses thrived on cussing, confronting, yelling, controlling, and made everyone miserable, and THEY SEEMED TO LIKE IT ! When I am in situations like that, I wither FAST. TAKE TESTS, read, and find out what kinds of professions are good for "avoidant" people. I wish I had, but I didn't know until TOO LATE. Now, at my age, I'm SCRAMBLING to find SOMETHING I CAN TOLERATE. I'm burnt out on bosses, co-workers, corporations, multi-tasking, customers, and all those things in Dilbert cartoons. If I wasn't married, I would rather live at the beach in a van than work with people.

I keep this dream?

I work and I can't get home. I can't find the car or my Dad took the car and forgot about me.

Chicago!

Beautiful Michigan ave! Yet, around the corner is...poverty!

Went down that lane and found a door and bad people with bad drugs and got out fast.

So went to the parking and...still couldn't find my car?

I went the other way and found Lake Michigan...and a giant card-board box. A homeless man was in their and saw me!

"Hey , kid? Looking for a place to stay?"

I go in their.

"You know?" he says. "A cardboard box is great! It keeps the rain off of you! It's great shelter...and the lake is right their to help ya sleep.

"If your lucky? You might find your own box. It's excellent! No one's looking for rent. It's your own box!"

I say, "Where I work, their is giant boxes like this!"

"Great...We can be neighbors and there is lot of us who need those boxes!

"Excellent...and, I thought the world was going bad?" He was happy!

DON'T ASK!