Depressed but what else?

38 male, lost good job 2 years ago, due to anger with the boss. I had also been drinking (binging) for 5 years before I lost the job. I am now sober. My father died 13 years ago from cancer. My Mom is 70, but is seeminly good health and my 2 year older brother seems fine.

I think I've always had a bit of a problem with authority figures, Big corporate structures and the super rich maybe more as I get older and more cynical.

I've been diagnosed with Major Depression and Social Anxiety.

I've been see a psychiatrist for about two years now and I am not sure I'm getting much help, he seems sincere though.

I have a fair amount of money, so I am not working. Also I just can't even envision going through all the hoops (suit-tie,fake smile,suck-up,loads of BS)

I also had a girlfreind in 2nd grade that moved away, I remember not liking that.

My next girlfreind in 8th grade did the same thing, they moved away the summer after and I never saw her again.

Then about 14, my Mom leaves our house (Father is abusive, yelling, throwing, mostly threatenly) for a few month. They eventually get divorced.

I'd always been shy, by now I just discovered computers and proceeded to spend every waking second in the computer lab. I think that really hurt what little social skills I had.

I'm 38 and have never been on a date, never kissed a girl, must I go on....the upside is I have no STDs.

Lately Ive really had thoughts of what is the point of all of this. Am I going suffer another 30 years? I must still be somewhat depressed because I have little or no interest in things I used to enjoy. I just sleep, watch TV and Internet. It's getting harder to come up with things to pass the time.

Analysis anyone?

I can relate in ways. But I think you should try another therapist, or something. Change something, it doesn't sound like you're being treated adequately. You deserve to be happy.

Are you on any medication? If you are, it might be the wrong dosage or medication for you. If not, you should think about trying it, you might find it'd help you quite a bit.

I hope that helps at least a little... I hope you find happiness somewhere.

Vincent,

It sounds to me that you are still depressed. You have a lot of the symptoms necessary for the diagnosis....and having a fear of socializing must be a lousy thing to add into the mix. I too have major depresseion and am going through what I call a mini depression. I'm on a good mixture of meds...my depression is more environmental than anything else.

I would encourage you to try something different....a new psychiatrist,or therapist...and what about meds? Do you take any?

Meds don't take away that MI but they can help your symptoms so that you can get on with your life...you know...make some friends that sort of thing.

I hope that you will press on for an answer so that you can lead a happier life.

Please let us know how things go, ok?

Kathy