To what extent can we recover???

I hear so much about people who learn how to live with a mental illness but are there those out there who have completely recovered and lived normal lives again? I ask this because I think that I have to make myself believe it before it can become a possibility. Right now, I believe that I'll only be able to make some improvements here or there but, overall, I will always be this way and not ever be content again. This isn't a very fun way to think as you can well imagine. I just really want to have the confidence that I can at least in the future live a normal life again. I think this is the single most important part to my recovery. It offers hope...

I was diagnosed with schizophrenia a little over two years ago. Fortunately, for me and my family, I responded very well to medication (risperidone). The thing that I found the hardest was to find motivation to do even the simplest things, such as brushing my teeth and getting up in the morning. I had no interest in anything. You see, when I was psychotic I was also very high. I had boundless energy and motivation and everything seemed new and exciting. When I came out of that high I felt like I was withdrawing from a drug or something.

But gradually, through persistence, I am getting better. I'm studying Library and Information Services at college and doing volunteer work. I'm still on medication of course. It's my safety net. I know I am less likely to relapse as long as I stay on my meds. Gradually, my interests are returning and I'm doing more housework than I used to. My recovery has been so slow, at first I used to despair that nothing was improving, but now that a couple of years have gone by, I know that, however gradual, it is happening. I would say I am leading a normal life.

I sometimes ask myself why am I not contented right now? Is it a psychiatric reason? Or is it psychological? I must admit that a lot of my dissatisfaction was from the loss of my job (I quit while I was delusional). My job gave me a social network, self esteem, status, and wealth. That's why when I started my recovery, I knew I had to do volunteer work to replace some of what I had lost.

Can you put your finger on what is preventing you from being content? Are your needs being met? At college I learned about Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs. Basically, it lists what you need to feel satisfied in life. It goes like this:

1st you have basic needs: food, shelter, etc.
2nd you have safety needs: protection & security (including job security)
3rd you have social needs: sense of belonging, being accepted
4th you have esteem needs: self-esteem, recognition, status
5th you have 'self actualisation' needs: stretching yourself and trying out new things that challenge you

In general, most people need to meet their 1st, 2nd and 3rd needs before they bother to meet the rest.

Are any of these needs missing from your life right now? What can you do to satisfy any needs that are missing?

G. Gabriel

ggabriel,

Here's a link to a site I thought you might like. It has loads of personal stories from people with schizophrenia that have fully recovered and grown even further than well. They are weller than well.

I was diagnosed a chronic SZ and the Dr's said I would never recover.
I built my own house 4 years after they said that and have been med free ever since.

http://www.webcom.com/thrive/schizo/welcome.shtml

Good luck and best wishes.

Besides being an alcoholic and compulsive overeater with ADD, I was diagnosed as bipolar as a young man. I took meds for many years. Eventually, I got off and became weller than well.

I've earned a number of honors, including Who's Who in Science. Once a movie was being made of my life to inspire young people to get into science. I was once hospitalized, now I'm living a life beyond my wildest dreams. Many famous people have suffered from mental illness. On my web site I have written extensively about how I put my life back together. I also have an article there about many famous people of the past and present who have suffered from mental illness. I suggest you read the article to get some hope.
Good Luck,
Jim S

You always seem to have something interesting and useful to say Jims. Good to have you on this forum. But one question: You say that you were on meds and then when you came off of them you started doing really well. Do you think the meds were holding you back? Or do you think that they were a necessary part of your recovery and you were just ready to move on when you went off of them? Right now I am in limbo. I am getting better from my GAD and depression but this is largely due to my seeing a therapist. I will, however, be leaving soon to go to a different country to study abroad (I'm in college). I won't be able to see my therapist for about 6 months or so. I want to go on medication (currently looking at Lexapro) so as not to slip back into my old habits again. I was on meds before (Paxil) and they seemed to help me quite a bit but when I went off of them I had a relapse because I wasn't in therapy and didn't work on anything to improve my thinking. I'm really at a crossroads I think. I don't want to have to rely on medication but at the same time I think that the upcoming stresses in my life sort of necessitate me taking them. This is all compounded by the fact that I won't be able to be in therapy when I'm away. But the way that I figure it, is that if I take medication for 6 months or so until I come back and return to therapy I can always go off of it and I'm sure my depression/anxiety will be waiting for me. So tell me what ya'll think...

Oh and one more thing Jims. There is also a book by Kathy Cronkite that is called The Edge of Darkness. This book includes personal stories of famous journalists, politicians, etc. that battled with mental illness. I also read your article! It was well written and very informative. I had no idea how many musicians suffered from mental illness. There is also an interesting article in the latest Rolling Stone about one of my favorite actors: Mickey Rourke. In it he speaks about his "madness" that caused his downfall from being one of Hollywood's most popular actors to being broke and relatively unknown. He is, however, now starring in Sin City and gradually coming to terms with his illness thanks to, as he described, his therapist.

I read the book you mentioned. It was good. There are a few more like it that I have found while walking the stacks in libraries. I will have to check out the Rolling Stone article.

I probably needed the meds for a while. When I went off of them, my life had become more stable. I had gone to AA for my alcoholism. I had started to make progress with my job, my junky car, my house with the leaky roof, my 100 pound beer belly, etc. Also, when I went off the meds, I really got into exercise--judo and running. The exercise moderated my mood swings much better than the pills ever did.
Good Luck,
Jim S