Altered mental status upon waking?

Does anyone here occasionally wake up to a seemingly less stable mental state? That happens to me on occasion, usually after mildly distressing dreams right before slipping from sleep to nominal wakefulness.

This morning, particularly marked. Not wanting to get up today. Want to stay curled up, not face anything. Least of all my decrepit self. Even more least of all my responsibilities. I am weak, lazy, and generally dense. Also my mind is showing signs of aging I can't really pay attention well or learn new things easily.

A lot of holding and rubbing my head like pressure inside and want to open it and let all the thoughts out to escape them. Would have been some mild SH but yeah no that attracts attention lol no that wouldn't do at all. I don't know, forcibly removing my brain is appealing in theory but I don't happen to have a spare. Messy.

I imagined trying to run away from myself down the road and well it would have garnered unfortunate attention then I started imagining myself sectioned and the resulting unpleasantness of having to explain myself to people who would have to talk to my partner and ruin my life. Not to mention I'd want out and they'd vociferously disagree with that desire. Not a great headspace, there. That can never happen.

And the jerks as if trying to shake myself free from the prison that is my brain. My body will jerk it my head will jerk to the side. I do that sometimes when I'm overwhelmed usually when not fully awake. Usually not always.

I think it's because you can't wear your masks perfectly when you're sleepy. Your defenses aren't fully present and the crazy inside peeks out. I'm idly curious if others do that or if it is just a me thing. As for myself, such states never last after a certain level of physical activity, I can't afford to indulge myself so. Oddly enough I want to continue this morning's altered mental state but got things to do so I'll put it back in box and shove it back in the closet of my mind. The veneer of normalcy settles in and my thoughts become less unstructured and less chaotic. But I am interested in whether that's a common phenomena or not. Just curious.

Otter wrote:I agree. When you dip into an unconscious state you don't have the same type of control you have when you are awake. So, just like dreams, your brain has difficulty organizing its thoughts - it's reality.

I have these same problems. If I try to sleep without my meds all sorts of anxiety and disorientation occur. When I am half awake I am likewise disorientated.

Having the (I think) Delta variant of the Wuflu made me like that pretty much 24/7 for a few days. One of the ways it was different from Nature's pestilences.

I was slipping out of that mindset as I wrote it and ofc now after six or seven hours it's quite buried again. I notice it's worse when I'm not sleeping enough. That and small muscle twitches when I don't get enough sleep. Meh.

emptywithinme wrote:I empathize with other people who wake up in a negative or any other mental state besides calm and rested.

Calm? Rested? That's often a rarity for me. Is what it is, though.