Anyone else suffering from stuck thoughts?

Is anyone else suffering from stuck/obsessive thoughts that just will not go away no matter what? They are constantly in my consciousness, no matter how hard I try to ignore them.

What kind of thoughts? I have memories that run through my head over and over. Bad memories. Rumination.

Every day, especially after drinking. I have horrible guilt and false memories about everything I could have done, things I may have said, done, people I may have hurt physically or emotionally.

Granted every day is like this whether I drink or not, but drinking makes it worse. I feel like a terrible person every day, like everything I do is a mistake.

Some thoughts I have daily are "What if I did something illegal?" "what if I'm going to get arrested?" "what if I said/wrote/texted something bad?" "what if I'm going to lose my job?" etc. etc.

The rumination is a killer. You just live in a fog and forget your entire day

I try to distract myself or get busy when my mind slips into this 'rewind'. It seems that all the mistakes I've ever made come back to haunt me whenever I mess up.
Sometimes I have said 'oh no' or sighed heavily when remembering regrets and bad moments. It is embarrassing when someone nearby over-hears me speaking to myself-especially when the words are sad or negative.
I quit drinking 30 years ago, but the horror comes back in glimpses of the past. Maybe recalling the past regrets are helping to keep me sober today?
Best of luck to you.

Wally58 wrote:I try to distract myself or get busy when my mind slips into this 'rewind'. It seems that all the mistakes I've ever made come back to haunt me whenever I mess up.
Sometimes I have said 'oh no' or sighed heavily when remembering regrets and bad moments. It is embarrassing when someone nearby over-hears me speaking to myself-especially when the words are sad or negative.
I quit drinking 30 years ago, but the horror comes back in glimpses of the past. Maybe recalling the past regrets are helping to keep me sober today?
Best of luck to you.

Yeah, this is day 3 sober for me, I had a lot happen in the last few days, woke up, threw everything away, and said FK it I'm not going to live like this. Not too much withdrawal wise, but I'm just done. Averaged about 30-40 drinks a week, mostly on weekends. I can say I've been here before, but I'm actually done and I can feel it. The "party" has gone on long enough.

I also talk to myself all the time LOL not like a crazy but thinking out loud. My personal favorite is the "I think I'll try to sleep" and your brain goes over and over everything you've ever done or makes stuff up as to what a horrible thing you are for thinking such things.


Rumination is awful. You make up things you have or haven't done, every possible outcome, etc.