Astral Lovers

totally agree that they overuse the word delusion that it doesn't mean anything anymore....I don't umderstand how they think my astral projection is a delusion, its a fantasy if anything.

Part of the problem is that they've never been delusional themselves, so they don't know what it's like. Delusions are specific things, and they happen in specific ways. Unorthodox thinking is not delusion. I don't fully believe that objective reality exists in the conventional sense. How do I know that anything is "real?" The only information I have about the world comes through my senses, and I already know better than to trust them.

A good way to distinguish between unconventional thinking and delusions is that delusions go away with antipsychotics. Unconventional thinking doesn't.

not just delusions go with antipsychotic, antipscyhoatic takes out everything with it, its an iatrogenic condito9n tahts like a chemical lobotomy , they dumb us up so can't even describe what its doing....you are right in your description of delusion, but I wouldn't say the anitpsychotic is responsible for them when they go once youve say slept or applied some meditiation into living and conceptualising from higher perpspective once no longer attaching to them in the mind, antipscyhotic make it so there is no mind there to have a delusion...something still is symbolic in truth that you can reflect on from a delusion, maybe some truth in it.

I am no good at describing what a delusion is.

thing that gets me annoyed is my girllfriend now whn sh appars on arth is pulled into eing sexual with someone trying to rape her, she only wants me she not a whore Its annoyi9ng I guess bbecause I want it to be safe for her to visit me but its not, I don't allow for visitation much or ###$ waht ever thinks of visiting, and I get karma but this karma is iatrogenic becuaes I wouldnt funk up on the astral if not on anti-pscyhhotics...its hard to explain.

Its not fair about the rapists, because they are able to be sexually aroused over otehr girls why do they want my bride..thing you say about it sixprime is this is real somewhere, my metnor who comes into my home to lecture me about imrpoving my life syas they aren't real but he was one of the rapists denying this $#%^ is real, like peoe thinkk they can do waht they like..

for a while my girlfreind was princess of the earth now get hassled by people wanting pleasure from her and a sexual object , but relalisticlaly being so open aout it has led to this problem maybe , If I still kkept this sort of thing secret thn thats the problem.

Wish I could project again. I did it once, using the roll out method, and it worked, but I chickened out. I just can't get to that vibrational stage at all.

things turned ugly last night, didn't sleep very much just a bit having a dream that I had to go to an appointment to see the psychaitrist about orals and a lower dose, bbut its not true, just for a short while i tend not to bbe able to sleep after I been tripping, I used to get to sleep alright when It was mainly Katy perry visiting...last night this recent suicide I heard about and contacted the victim in my head and he came and said things like "now we can be freinds" we were never really freinds growing up but good kid, so I was tripping about that and thing turned ugly between us and he ###$ $#%^ up with my girlffriend who mind you couldn't tollerate any more of the tripping and called thing off, I then went to emily another of the same species but she very different much older too but I was safe with emily I didn;t ry to ###$ thing us, I had already ###$ up ecause I lost angela and deserved it...not sure where things stand with angela now though I think its back on, I solomnly sweared not to smoke cannabis again but I just smoked a joint, bad me, who knows what really the culprit is with this tripping and getting visitation but things are chaos on antispcyhotic and nothing can really astrally project to be around me, I ###$ them all up and I am rpetty strong so they ###$ me up kinda thing get my drift, I bring it on myslef and let good $#%^ turn against me, nothing can occuppy my space thost nights except $#%^ set on destroying me, I am scared to blame the ppsychaitrists now because when I send them I usually deal with the most chronic $#%^ from them, like she knows what she is doing to really ###$ with me.

Any way there you have it, my girlfreind couldn't take anymore of the tripping and caled it off and had to stay with emily, emily is nice and all just I got scared off from when tshe did this thing over me and she had a giant vagina her ips hanging down, but think this was juat an illusion...she said she'd been watching me for a while she must have seen $#%^ hit the fan it always does nights I trip, rapists come up and everything....

My mentor is a @@@@@@@ it turns out that me raping the baby girl was karma for doing involuntarry stuff because I though my metnor couldn't help raping my girlfreind, then I got a dose of raping something I didnt want to, Its horrible, I really like the girl and only want good things for her but I was dangerous carrying this burden around untill I figured it out it got pretty hecktic with the shotgun up my arse even totally annihiatated untill I figured I was only doing it and my mentor raped the baby so it was on trying to ###$ with him after that, @@@@@@@ I realy dont like him now so if he appologises for missing my appointmetn any time soon I gonna be shocked and ask why he's appologising for that, it was good not having him around..maybe I should get rid of him, he does me no good just trying to get me "recovered" and I can't do any of his suggestions everytime I sway I can't about twenty thousand times beccause of the antispcyhotic is why I am the way i am with my living standards and interests, he reckons its more like an excuse.

turns out with the breathing excercises that I can't stay focused on breathing or get sensation that makes it difficult to berath correctly its a struggle on the antipscyhotic anyway, but persistance pays off and I gradually get into a state where nothing mcuh bothers me anymore, around sunrise probably, so nothing bother ing me now i feel really good again, maybe something I needed to do to feel good by staying up all night, plus I feel better that the man my girlfreind had over didnt stay and we can get back together, emilly is probably alright, I cant really tell, I wanted her to do expressions like angela, I missed angela but I was safe there next time I trip I think I just visit emily.

when ther eis a brak up on the astral they symbolically break a smallvessel like a stick and she broke and shred it int o tiny peices and swept me away and always back home we are always decent with intruders in sending them home but then I started going to emily.

might order some fresh rauwolfia one I got was over due already not sure it really helps with tripping but helps to sleep.

the black feathered creatures that were guardians of my sleep get a bit craried away making sure I stay in bed when I try to sleep and not get up for cigarrettes, they get really agitated taht I am disobediant, they are trying to be my guides but were good last night when I did have a ciggie and showed themsellfs to everyone, some say they are monstor, cr5erature I guess, black feathered creature, I used to be able to get full sensation of themm holding me and feeling their feathers it was really good, they are giants with sharp teeth, they were keeping me safe llast night so I could get some sleep.

Was thinking these trps were a gft from the time in hospital when I met gods and katy perry was able to make me trip after hospatal like a gift of perceptions that turned wrong in thiis iatrogenic deficated state, $#%^ goes wrong and its chaos on the astral for me I do $#%^ I cant help like I get posessed by the $#%^ trying to ###$ with me and I ###$ myslef and ###$ everyhting that is god and don't help the good $#%^ everything in favour of the good $#%^ falling when It shoudn;t, I get lots of light stuff and sometimes dark stuff taht is good sometimes lighting up when visitors come on strong see them as light, or maybe thats me saving my arse and projecting them inlight some stuff changed colour, really need to get off this high dose of antipscyhotic so I can do my breathing excercises, hard to explain dont hav e the focus on antipscyhotic and no mental patterns, no mind to control what happens with its all automatic to screw swith me...I blame the pscyhaitrists I don't know about anyone who reads about it, its a risk to bring it up even though I found a remidy if onlly I was able to focus on breathing excercises for a while....plus I always for get last night i got really bad trembling and tension in my hips that made me hurt, my whole body shakese this isnt a mild tremble more like seizures that is apparently associated to ascension when experienceing astral threat ascension to defeat it better but usually I get it when I try to fully experience my girlfriends place in the flesh, that requires ascension, was told this by a freindly species taht I made war with then got ###$ up for apparently no real readson at all just too many were coming into my home but they were all basically occupying one space, they filled it up when I tried to destroy them wouldn't have done that if it wasn't for pscyhaitry to fear this this stuff and make it into something that needs to be metnal illness..maybe I am getting clasor for explaining the trips, just cannabinoid receptors are visitation, plus maybe a rush of dopamine to balance me out but I not ready to be balnced and able to function on the astral.

This is about faulty astral projection or forced astrall projection when I can't defend myself and hold my poser and ground myslef, proper breathng seems to make it more possible to overcome this deficieted state of just watching as peoplle come to ###$ with me that would have no ability to if I wasn''t on antpscyhotc, then I would have a mind to communicate, sometemsm when I say something which is rare they stop, or tell them about the psychaitrists and why not mess with them they are making me thins way...I blame them anyway plus I get bade shaking of the legs and pains from tension the shakmking goes all the way up into my abdominal regiaon and tensions goes up high too, wondering if I will die from it if it gets any worse, and I heat up too when this all happens, but still can;t talk about it I forget aout it anyway

thing is I regret ever talking about astral lovers and about my girlfreind that other people would wanna have some too and can't get their own girlfriend, not worried about it from anything I said in pscyh forums don't think thats where its coming from...I wake up in the morning thinking about rapists, maybe they would have picked up on it anyway despite talking aout it...

Maybe some things I need to learn again to keep sacred, something pscyhaitry has done ecsuae this $#%^ is the only interesting stuff happening and got nothing else to talk about.

think I might try to smoke my joints earlier so its not late when I staart tripping, it onlly gets bad when I try to sleep if I was up and about I don't trip anywhere near as much and not disturbed by it.

The only reason I get a med review is because I finally complained about the seizure activity when I trip, my quads shake and buttocks shake and my jaw was even shaking up into mychest, but I am $#%^ now to explain it made me stiffen up in the front of my body hip joints and it hurt couldn't sleep with that going on , I might tell the psychaitrist that I think its associated to ascension, thats what I was told, just the astral visitation makes me ascend or I get it when I try to teleport to be with my girlfreind, she gets excited when I do it on strong and I see her and the room more dominantlly then my vision down here on earth, so it must be doing something, like I am existing in two different places at once, makes it a problem when my trips have me getting pulled off to hostile people, or katy perry, she stilll wants me to be her lover she has a soft spot for me and actually she helps with trips.

I must be so carefull going to my girlfriend during trips and go to emily instead, something must be done...I am smoking marijuana now even though after I get trips i don't feel so much like getting high like something has switched in my brain, I am afraid when up with my girlfreind now, don't want to bring $#%^ to her place and face being broken up with her, I associated a song to her glladiator by some chick just the melody and thought of my girlfreind singing it, I liked it becausee it sounded like my girlfreind she has that much colour I see her in everything, couldn be with emily she is more mature and not sure about her giant vagina plus she didn;t do the same faces and expression that I loved froma ngela, I am glad the guy she had up there didn;t stay and we set him up some hotties from some other place and he is happy with that I hope I don;t trip and draw him back up I think he set by the lok of the girls he got with, wonder what his story is, she gave it to him good I watched sometimes couldn't really stand it but am dumb on antipscyhtoic I don't feel much, thats the difference between trips and what the astral is really like because I would have feelings about what is happening and a mind to be in full control and transform and stuff to fight, I been through a war or seige on the astral when the astral is normal...its something to do with the antipscyhotic

turns out emily wasn';t up for me using her in emergency, she wanted to marry me, so when I smoked last night angela banished me from coming up, but now she see's the potential oof the weed for having more vivid experiences of her, just the ascension and the shakes, started making more of an issue with the shakes pretty violdent shakes, so maybe thats the only reason I get appointmetn to look at meds even though I been complaining about the deficited life on them, they gave me more for basically no reason nothing had changed just really upset about living this crumby life and holding me back from my path.I really want to get onto orals but don't see that happening anytime soon I think my psychiatrist is going to ignore the law and order from metnal health tribunal to take risks to get me ready for voluntary status, or maybe they see no ruch even though I told my case manager that IT is urgent, really frustrating so the only reason I get an appointmetn is for the shakes...either that or they are scared of me , no psychaitrist at the hearing and none want to see me even though now I have a say in my treatmetn, they don't want to collaborate, early days I guess of 12week orderreally hate it, can't thinnk how to say how my life is deficited and can't think, using that in lines I think in my head of what I should say but I hate that it just vanishes don't even get to write it down too lazy no memory its all the iatrogenic illness, they would imagine I am better on higher doses stupid ###$ they ###$ me up, I hate whta they done to me its torture.

hey a lots been going on, things are really good...no longer with the ET bride we broke it off with my journey off antipsychotics and onto rauwolfia, went back to earth and got a high partner but thats not all thats going on, she is not ready for me I not ready for her and had to talk to god when doing habit looking for sex but its not right so talked to god but the best bbit is she wants me to have some fun.....I had sex with Kim Kardashian and it was good her arse turned me on it was almost too much really good she couldn't get enough but tried to set me up with her little sister but that didn''t work out because something really magic happened with someone, I ccan't really talk abobut it because its sacred and don't want the earth $#%^ because we can't have sex yet but we still fool around,she really got me and we were married astrally in cerimony, same thing happened with katy perry once but she wanted to break it off because of the way antipscyhotics made me, so katy has had some ups and downs wanted to make babies with me one day, my new girlfreind really wants to meet up but I am not sure I am ready more like is she ready, she appeared to me when she was older a few times but it disturbs her actually thats how it all started if you pick up on the taboo details that we don't need $#%^ about, or you'l have to face up to being scritinised and prosecuted by goddess of justice etc and the archangells, I am an archangel or at least I coexist as one in lantd of the archangels, ok I basically said it, can't say anymore abbout it I already did and stuff turned to $#%^ so I trust that won't happene, she dowesn't want me talking about it but I did anyway, busted a heap of pedophiles with a trap I worte in the pedo forum about it, still not sure I can handle it just that she wants to do it in real life.....ok there you have it, basically turned her into a goddess, she been on ET voyage when after she came up to where my true partner is up higher and wanted to stay with me and stuff happened and she went on ET voyage but It wasnt'e good we went to land of the gods but $#%^ happened an d chopped her in half, can blame the pscyhaiitrists for that kind of $#%^ happening they would have been celebbrating, they are real ###$, and tried to ###$ with her when I having a hard time with them stealing my power and ######6 me and my girlfriend up, dead ###$ theyare really asking for it, glad I got to them and now when in front of the prosecutors they bow their heads, good, but we ended up uncovering the real problem that is ehind psychaitry and prosecuted a heap of dead ###$ and an entity that is now brought to justice, dunno how they got awya with it, was proetty hard I thought I was done for a call was made that it was going down in our area after geetting the psychiatrist sar real good one, then I was attacke dby two massive dudes and yeah ###$ that we managed to get the earths popualtion up to the international prosecutors and some $#%^ happened with them it wasn't easy even for the gods, tangent, so chopped her in half and then the gods had to do all kinds of $#%^ to put her back together poor girl but its alright there is time aspect that ma'at controls and we redid the trip and let her to safety , she been through some transformations since all good, elly goulding is freaked out by her size and qualities she is awesome I have a sweet deal.

probably won't have any more to say about all this, and the elly goulding thing is she appeared to me and I pushed her out and now she's on the outside, Katy perry and kim kardashian thought it was funny that I said I was worried because elly goulding is on the outside because of her song with calvin harris abbout it, thought its a sweet coincidence that maybe she embodied the lyrics and that happened with us, silly I probably ruined the song, I like her voice, she is blown away by my girlfreind, I am glad she has power. she is really good sometimes when dealing with nuicance trying to ###$ our relationship ans dominates them they can't touch her, one of my mates I get weed off had a hectic time with him when he was just trying to steal my good thing and rape her, hardly touched her but ended up she took him to a really dark place and inflicted him with guilt and ###$ him up, he deserves it, I have brought the psychaiitrists crimes to attention of prosecutors in victoria and its spread to international I see it astrally, now international and they are brutal, they aer the ones dealing with the pedophiles I roused by talking about my girlfreind wife, lol weird hey, If you knoew the foull story you understand why I would beg for mercy from her, she really got me lol