Am I a klepto?

Hello, my name is Emily. I am 15 years old, and a high school student.

I first started stealing about 3 months ago because my best friend did. And since she did it, I didn't think it was a big deal.

That was a big mistake. At first, I didn't steal again for about a month. And when I did steal again, it was from the dollar store. Again, I didn't think it was a big deal.

I have never stolen clothes, movies, or anything over $20. I know that doesn't make it any better, but I figure it's a start.

Recently, I have gotten to the point, that I steal almost everyday. Even if it's only one thing. I don't have anxiety on the days that I don't steal, but I now feel that this HAS to be a compulsive behavior.

Most of my thefts are premeditated. Also, where as I used to look through magazines and say, "I should buy that." Now I look through magazines and say, "I should steal that."

I've also noticed that I've "moved up" in a sense. I now steal from Rite-Aid, K-Mart and Krogers, instead of the Dollar Store. That again has me worried, because I don't know what's next.

I'm not sure why I do this. My only obvious reason is that its free. I like having a new lipgloss whenever I want. However, it's just not worth the risk...and while I acknowledge that, I still can't stop!

I wonder if it could have something to do with the death of my mother, or my father's former alcoholism (he's currently in AA). I'm not an attention seeker, at least I don't think I am. I am on Prozac, for my depression. Other than that... I don't really know.

The thought of getting caught scares me to death. Going to hell scares me to death. I am a saved person, who goes to church as often as I can. However, I'm not sure if this will, reverse it? I don't know anymore...

I know this isn't good, and I want to stop! Honest to God, I feel like I have these 2 different people in my head. I have the Honor's Student who doesn't know why I'm doing this, and wants to stop. Then I have the bad person inside, who thinks its free stuff, so what's bad about it?

Please reply and help...I want to beat this before I get caught.

My friend and I used to joke about how we're "kleptos", but does this make me one? I don't think so...but I'm not 100% sure.

This forum seems kind of dead, but I figured I'd reply anyway.

I'm not sure of the exact definition of a kleptomaniac, but I -think- it's more of an impulsive thing. Not planned out and all that.

You might be able to find some psychology websites that elaborate more on that, however.

It seems as if you could be confused about your moral code, rather than be a kleptomaniac. Kleptomaniacs steal to release tension, perhaps you just like getting things for free, is that such a bad thing? I used to suffer from a lot of guilt when I was a christian, but now I can accept that no part of me is bad. Now that I have the belief that evil can only exist in the context of a goal or aim, I can relax again and do whatever will benefit both me and those I care about. This may not be suitable for you, but please, stop hurting yourself.
Either trust god to give you strength, or learn to trust yourself.

Edit: Oh dear, looks like a bad case of thread necromancy...