An Introduction

I go by the name of Xvall on a number of forums / websites / communities online. I am a nineteen year old Psychology major (Bachelor of Arts) studying at DePaul University in Chicago. I have few hobbies and prefer to spend a great deal of my time on the computer.

I was diagnosed, at a young age, with Tourette Syndrome and Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (Not OCPD, though some of my behavior may be reminiscent of it), and although the severity of my TS has decreased substantially (or, at the least, I've learned to exert a greater sense of control over it) these conditions continue to be an integral part of my experience living on this planet. I'm comfortable with my neurological quirks at this point in my life and I don't feel particularly distressed about my conditions.

These are the only two diagnoses that are attributed to me in any written document. Aside from this, I have been informed, by others, that I display a number of traits that are indicative of schizoid personality disorder: the most apparent being a general comportment of apathy, extreme introversion, disinterest, emotional (arguably social) ineptitude, and a sexual orientation which at this point could be called asexuality (I have never had a "mate", "girlfriend", "sexual partner", or what have you - I've never made an effort to and I'm not sure if I ever will). My behavior (and philosophical outlook [or perhaps lack thereof] on the universe) has led some people to believe that I have Anti-Social Personality Disorder, but I do not fit most of the diagnostic criterion for this disorder and in spite of my lack of emotional connectivity to the human species I manage to keep myself out of trouble and I'm generally not regarded as a deceitful person - then again, if I was, I would make sure to explicitly state that I wasn't, wouldn't I? Others have made accusations of Schizotypal Personality Disorder but I don't think that the few "quaky" ideations I've subscribed to in the past (and possibly the present) are enough to categorize me as such.

I haven't seen a psychologist in a very long time - quite frankly I prefer to avoid the stigma, though I know, yes, that doing this is ineffectual and pointless: the last time I saw anyone about any disorders was when I visited a neurologist who took an MRI (I can provide neat pictures, if you're at all interested). During the course of the discussions leading up to the MRI I made a special point of masking all of my symptoms and appearing as normal as possible. Maybe he was able to see through it but I think I managed to play off the part of socially-refined productive member of society plausibly; the sole reason for my visit having been to appease the requests of my parents (who strongly recommended medication, which I didn't want for a number of reason) and not in any way made out of my own volition.

I think this is about the extent of my cognitive resume. That aside, I enjoy the aestheticization of violence (via film, video game, music, or any other artistic medium; physical violence is something that I have never been known to engage in, don't worry), philosophizing, political discussions, writing, music (I can play the keyboard/piano almost decently) and a variety of licit and illicit pharmacological agents. (I do a variety, with different levels of frequency, and have no intention of explicitly abstaining from this behavior anytime in the nearby future.)

Hey,

You say that you don't want the "stigma" of going to a psychologist again but it very much sounds like you are caught up in the stigma of mental illnesses in general. Perhaps the course that you are doing has something to do with this.

You exhibit knowledge on a range of illnesses and it appears that you cannot 'decide' on which one decribes you. Perhaps it is the in-depth knowledge itself that you posses that is the reason for this indecision. However, you are probably aware that the symptoms of illnesses overlap repeatedly in other illnesses.


Take, for example, me. I have Asperger's syndrome but I show symptoms of Schizophrenia and ADHD also. However, it is Asperger's that describes me the best. So, my question is: What illness describes YOU the best?

Take care,
Kevin.

Chucky wrote:
Take, for example, me. I have Asperger's syndrome but I show symptoms of Schizophrenia and ADHD also. However, it is Asperger's that describes me the best. So, my question is: What illness describes YOU the best?

Take care,
Kevin.

Great question, I will have to think about this. I might need help.

smalltalkred

Hey,


Will you get back to me if you make progress with this? I'm interested to know how you're doing.


Kevin.

Well I think all of my dx's are:
Major Depression recurrent
Severe Post Traumatic Stress Disorder
Insomnia
Borderline Personality Disorder

I am a survivor of alot of long term trauma.

Go figure, I bet there is more.

Come on? Anyone else???

Long-term trauma is devastating. I'm sure many of us know only too well the things it can do to a person. If it occurs all throughout a person's childhood then it tends to stick with them. The brain develops the most in childhood and if it develops alongside constant mental trauma then it's harder to 'eradicate' as an adult.

I feel that my entire childhood has been forever lost.


You have insomnia also? - What is your sleeping pattern like?


Kevin.