Multiple Rage Incidents

Through consultation with several counselors and a psychiatrist, I believe a diagnosis of IED is appropriate. In fact, it seems to fit to a tee.

Twice now I have reached maximum anxiety in meetings with 3 different counselors. Today I stood up and literally threatened to punch my primary counselor in the head. In my defense, I had just described a primary trigger and he asked me a political question *mod edit* right before the end of our session. I was directed to another crisis counselor and he also triggered me with his use of psychobabble terms like "obviously no one wants to harm you" and "this is just another tool in your toolbox." Are there NO Alpha Male counselors who have experience with IED?

These events triggered multiple other actions throughout the day. I was escorted out of two branches of my bank, destroyed a pet sitter, an 8 year old girl. I begged a neighbor who ambushed me to hit me just so I could punch him in the face. He called the police instead.

Now comes the period of shame, regret and remorse. How do you apologize for saying hurtful things to an 8 year old neighbor? So far I've had rage events with 3 of the counselors at my Behavioral Health Center.

Good news is that the psychiatrist prescribed Lamictal (anti-convulsion) medication. Side effects include a fatal rash, but I'll try anything at this point.

I wish there were an online forum discussion of men with IED. Colorado doesn't seem to have the resources I need. Any suggestions about help online or how to find a good men's group would be greatly appreciated.

Hope this regret, remorse and shame dissipate soon.

Please send me a private message if you have similar experiences and want to start a conversation. I feel all alone here with these feelings.

Sounds like your getting the help you need. Hopefully once the medication kicks in, you can tolerate the therapy better for maximum benefit. Good luck!!
-D