IED is destroying my life

I am a 27 year old man who has a pretty severe case of IED.. It has caused me to lose family friends girlfriends and employment. I was diagnosed with IED at a pretty young age along with other mental illnesses.. So I have been struggling with it for the majority of my life.. I have been on a number of different medications that I was told would help with it.. But either they didn't help or I was having some pretty serious side effects.. I have also been through a lot of anger management programs.. I just cannot seem to figure out how to manage this problem.. I have alot of coping skills that I use and for theost part they are pretty effective.. But when I keep getting into frustrating/stressful situations over and over again the coping skills begin to not be as effective and the stress and frustration just becomes too much to handle and I just explode.. I'm a pretty big guy.. I stand 6'2 and about 260 so when I explode I can definitely do some damage.. I've been in a plethora of fights.. Have had many assault charges and many destruction of property and disorderly conduct charges.. I absolutely hate and cannot stand having this illness I am not this angry scary hostile person.. I have been struggling to keep jobs and any type of relationship.. I've been homeless off and on since I was 18.. I know that I am a much much better person than alot of ppl think.. I do not want to keep losing control and messing up my life.. So anyway I was told about this website and figured I'd give it a try and see if I can find anybtype of insight/help.. I am open to any and every suggestion.. I just want to be the person I know I am.