First ever hospital visit. Tomorrow.

I am a 28-year-old male. After a disastrous experience moving across the country and back, I am headed for my first ever hospital visit tomorrow. I have felt like I've needed to go to the hospital for the past few months, but I couldn't due to the nature of my circumstances (moving across the country). Somehow I powered through that, but now I am just so completely exhausted and my meds (Remeron) have not been helping and possibly making things worse - I feel groggy, tired, dizzy, hopeless, empty, confused, suicidal, etc. I read so much negative meaning into the smallest things, and I have struggled to make even the smallest decisions day to day. Anything I would normally enjoy feels like a nightmare, and everything feels like it takes an enormous amount of effort to do. Today I heard a car go by on the street and I started ruminating to myself: What if that car crashed? Then those poor people might get injured, and they would have to get a new car and blah blah blah - that would not even REMOTELY be my problem if it happened, and it likely wouldn't happen anyway!!! That is the degree of absurdity my worrying has reached. My parents started inquiring about if I felt I needed to go to the hospital yesterday, and today I decided to take it into my own hands and just get it over with instead of waiting until I was forced to go against my will. So tomorrow, I go.

Any success stories with this approach, prayers or encouraging words would be appreciated. I am so scared.

Sorry to hear of your suffering, its not a nice place to be. Good on you for taking the big step of going to hospital. Sounds like your meds need to be addressed, something im sure they will look at for you.
Hospital can be like a break away from everything, well for me anyway. A time to de-stress and talk to people when in need.
I hope you find it a supportive environnment, all the best.

M

Thanks for the support. I see from your blog that you speak from experience. I hope things are okay for you right now.

Hi aordinary,

I'm glad you completed your move back home. I think you made a brave decision to go to the hospital. I'm sure it wasn't an easy decision, but I think it's good you recognize you need help and are taking positive action to get well again. I wish you all the best.

Many hugs,
Jan