Social re-integration - how?

Firstly: I am new to this forum, having joined only a few minutes ago. I do not know if I am making this thread in the correct section of the forum, nor do I know whether or not this thread is suitable. If I have erred in posting this thread, please forgive me, and either move or delete it (depending on the nature of the error made).

I don't quite know where else I can go on the internet with regard to the questions I want to put forward here. I have heard about this forum from people in the past, though, and have heard that it is a welcoming forum that is highly accommodating towards the various needs of its members.

I used to visit forums like this, and others similar to it (dealing with the themes of social isolation, in particular), a few years ago, and indeed, much of my time and energy was consumed through posting on forums like these. It didn't help me, though, and after some personal difficulties and a wish to dramatically alter my life, and change the course of my ship, I left the internet. I am here again, though, as I realize now that there is nowhere else that I can discuss the topics which I would like to learn more about. I hope that someone here can help me.

Okay, so the introduction is out of the way, the instruments have been tuned, and I can now delve into the real subject of this thread: Social re-integration, re-socialization, for long-term sufferers of social estrangement/isolation (for whatever reasons). How can these processes be implemented through a pragmatic, structural approach? Are there any resources or communities on the internet that are purposely aimed towards the acquisition and subsequent sharing of knowledge regarding these processes? I've tried looking, but most resources that I come across deal with social-reintegration for those released from prison, and recovering alcoholics and drug-users. Whilst I understand and fully support the resources available to those people, and respect their attempts to re-join society, I would also like to see general resources and support be made available for those who have lived outside of society (mentally, not necessary a physical separation) for a large amount of time, and who strongly desire a reintegration into mainstream society, to become fully-functioning, happy members of their communities.

I'm not going to write anymore now, as I am already embarrassed by how unintelligible this post has become, I'm sorry. I hope that at least someone can extract some of my intention from the text above, and be able to respond to it. Thank you.

Thank you for your well-written and clear inquiry about social reintegration. It's a topic that has become important to me as well since I'm trying to broaden my contacts and get to the point where I am comfortable with a wider world. I haven't got very far, so I don't have many bright, tried and tested suggestions to share. However, here are my first steps.

1. I reconnected with one "safe" person who has been out of my life for some time: my sister. This contact was remote (email, telephone).

2. I reconnected with one "unsafe" person, someone I have been uncomfortable with for some time: my ex. This was very difficult, and still feels unpleasant, but it turned out not to have been so terrible as I anticipated. This contact was also remote (email).

3. I made and kept an appointment with a new therapist. This journey made it essential that I use public transportation and go into the downtown area among strangers.

4. In the past, when I had this problem (but at a time when I felt more self confident than I do now), I made a schedule for myself in which I went out by myself to a local coffee shop, ordered coffee, and sat there for some time. I also went to the local library where I would need to communicate with the staff to take out and return books.

I would love to get to a point where I can walk confidently out the front door, have a full social life, date again, get out into the community and do volunteer work, get a full-time job, have a network of friends, and so on. That is my ultimate goal. If I achieve even a portion of this, I will be glad.

Join a club!

Your post was not unintelligible at all, quite the opposite! Sadly, I have no help to give as I'm in the same situation. I'm just here to say that I, as well, would love any advice or information on this topic that others could offer.

Hi, I think it partly depends on the needs of the individual, e.g. if going out at all is scary or walking down the street. Starting by connecting to people one has known, as Ori mentioned, seems like a very good idea.

As far as I know, mental health services, like day centres may be able to help. I.e. if you go to your general doctor and ask to be referred to them, or maybe a psychiatrist who can then refer you to day services. Although that wouldn't mean being outside with mainstream society, it's a start towards meeting other people in a safer environment. E.g if you can't make it to activities they understand and will be supportive (or should be).

There's a compeer programme in the US, not sure if I'm allowed to post the site but the main one is compeer.org. You're likely to find more info from the local branch in your State, if you're in the US. There are similar things in the UK as well, not sure about other places. It's a befriending scheme where volunteers meet those with 'mental health' needs, which would include difficulty going out or social isolation I believe, for an hour every week, for a year and it often continues beyond that. I think you have to be referred by a doctor though (not sure why). That too you could ask your doctor about and/or give them the no. to find out if they haven't heard of it. It's compeer.org. Not sure if I'm allowed to put that link on here.

I suggest starting off with one or two things and gradually building up more activity. Try looking online for something like supported volunteering or gardening, something you enjoy. Mental health services may also know more about local things going on or other voluntary organisations/activites. I know that might sound scary, but it's usually very gentle and gradual. I've also seen a couple of online mental health 'dating' sites, which could be a way of finding friends as they probably allow you to look for friends on there as well. Plus you're likely to find others who also feel socially isolated and would understand how you feel. Just look up mental health dating on the net.

Going to the library as Ori said, is a good idea too, I think. Another possibility is going to a local class in something you're interested in. Like beginners art, or music, etc...

Perhaps a section on this site with possible things to try would be helpful.

-- Fri Jul 29, 2011 4:14 pm --

Hi, I think it partly depends on the needs of the individual, e.g. if going out at all is scary or walking down the street. Starting by connecting to people one has known, as Ori mentioned, seems like a very good idea.

As far as I know, mental health services, like day centres may be able to help. I.e. if you go to your general doctor and ask to be referred to them, or maybe a psychiatrist who can then refer you to day services. Although that wouldn't mean being outside with mainstream society, it's a start towards meeting other people in a safer environment. E.g if you can't make it to activities they understand and will be supportive (or should be).

There's a compeer programme in the US, not sure if I'm allowed to post the site but the main one is compeer.org. You're likely to find more info from the local branch in your State, if you're in the US. There are similar things in the UK as well, not sure about other places. It's a befriending scheme where volunteers meet those with 'mental health' needs, which would include difficulty going out or social isolation I believe, for an hour every week, for a year and it often continues beyond that. I think you have to be referred by a doctor though (not sure why). That too you could ask your doctor about and/or give them the no. to find out if they haven't heard of it. It's compeer.org. Not sure if I'm allowed to put that link on here.

I suggest starting off with one or two things and gradually building up more activity. Try looking online for something like supported volunteering or gardening, something you enjoy. Mental health services may also know more about local things going on or other voluntary organisations/activites. I know that might sound scary, but it's usually very gentle and gradual. I've also seen a couple of online mental health 'dating' sites, which could be a way of finding friends as they probably allow you to look for friends on there as well. Plus you're likely to find others who also feel socially isolated and would understand how you feel. Just look up mental health dating on the net.

Going to the library as Ori said, is a good idea too, I think. Another possibility is going to a local class in something you're interested in. Like beginners art, or music, etc...

Perhaps a section on this site with possible things to try would be helpful.