I have hope. Get your own... :)

I have hope. Certain people have been trying to beat it out of me all of my life. Others just laugh and talk behind my back. I do care, but I can't entertain their beliefs/attitudes and pursue mine. Its a reflection of their condition, not mine. Hope, or the concept that things are going to get better is not found in someone else's opinion, or even in the evidence surrounding me. Hope is something I nourish in my own heart.

Basically its a decision that I make. In spite of the "odds", in spite of the "evidence", in spite of "others", I simply choose to carry on, and choose to believe, and act as if the life I want exists. And while doing that, I know that if there is a chance in heck that it does exist, I am sure as heck going to be part of it! lol

And if It doesn't, well, the hope is an inoculation against the despair that would destroy myself, and the life that I have now. Imperfect as my life is now, there are moments that are not so bad, moments when things are better, when my burden is lifted and I feel a glimmer of something lovely. I live for these moments.

I don't use hope to torment myself though. There are times when hoping is too much. At those times I just let things be, and tend to the most peaceable thing I can. Like playing a video game, or of course watching house hunters... lol

If I could sell hope would only sell a tiny seed of it, and let people nurture it themselves. Because if I were to sell them my fully grown hope, they would probably be overwhelmed, and do something risky. It might motivate them to feel that they could do anything and that thing may not be appropriate. The only appropriate hope is the one that you find within yourself, and feed it your tiniest dreams, until you develop a rapport, and find that you can trust it to shade, comfort and nourish you right back.

Don't count on anyone to give you hope. Nourish your own. Let it nourish you. Its totally worth it, it'll help you make marvelous decisions, it'll help you over come challenges, it'll keep the wolves out, and the in time even help keep the cupboards full. But don't buy it from hope dealers, They cost a fortune, they can't guarantee the appropriateness of the hope they sell, nor will they make good on any guarantees, and if you cross them you will find that you are out on the street with NOTHING to show for it.

And if you have hope, if its tiny and immature, wait until its a bit older and more mature before you buy anything that is supposed to nourish it. The things you buy may not work, and you don't want to risk your immature hope. A fully functioning Hope can withstand a lot of disappointment. When I say buy, I am talking about exchanging $Trust$- & (money and/or time) with the expectation that your hopes will be satisfied. Only buy when your hope is strong enough to withstand an disappointment equal to the thing your are hoping for....

Serene, what beautiful things you say I'm sorry I didn't reply to this earlier. What are some of the things that help you feel hopeful?

Thank you, Serene for these words...I couldn't have read anything more "hopeful" at this time of need.