i need some advise what to do

Hi all,
dont know if any of you had similar experience but maybe someone can say something about my confusion..
Since childhood i grew up as a pleaser, i had to be please to be acknowledged, but as child how could i reason things differently??all i wanted attention..(i am abandoned child never abused but seldom felt a hug )

my problem is I have a girlfriend for years, we spent every weekdayat work and every friday night out..Yes she was dating some guys but they were married and not available , so actaully we two girls started haning out..not only staying out dinners? when i come home phone calls from her so long sometimes i went to sleep while phone was still on, She never liostened to me, we had to talk her work life and her ideas about reading books, her men in her life, but never once came to my world, even i tried to say something it was one calssic word to change back to subject to her telling things to me...so i gave up talking, and listening so when i went slerep while she was talking she did not even know i was sleeping she kept talking..so this kept going 5 years and she started seeing a man which is older than her father, he was married she stayed at their home, and they started a relationship, while she started a realtionship she wanted to have realtionship with other man opverseas, and did, she left the older man to go younger one but he left her..then she came back to older man..although i never approved her ways which i could never do specially betraying a trust, but after her relationshi ended with younger man she stopped talking to me..stopped hanging out with me just casual hello good morning at work...for 3 years never went out oh we did 2 times once she was mad at boyfriend so she would not see her so she asked to gout, seciond she supposed meet him later so she neede to kill some time...2 times going out togerther for dinner in 3 years...no explanation no nothing...3 years i was wondering blaming myself what happende did i say soemthing did i do something??

then one day she came up with idea going vacation with me to my country, she always wanted to visit..that was a schock because 3 years being so tired for a dinner suudenly going to vacation with me became thge main issue..she still dont ask how life is treating me...then finally she explained boyfriend did not want to go because he did not like going to museums..so would be perfect if we go together...i said letme try..she makes more monet than me i am struggling to pay m,y bills...if i can make it...but i could not..not to make her pay for me said lets go some other time...

she stopped talking to me completely..now not even good morning or good evening....nada...everyone wants to know why we do not talk..i do not know what to say..and people started looking at me strange recently, i started noticing her turning people against me..?

can anyone tell me did i miss something here??if i did i will correct??what did i do wrong??
i am too proud to keep asking for forgiveness...because i did not ask for vacatiuon and could not make it..
please help

Star,

You've got a little golddigger on your hands. Always plotting a plan B just in case, and she obviously has issues with being alone and acceptance.

I think she sees you as a caring person but doesn't really care except to use you as a plan B.

If I were to lable it I'd label her histrionic and bpd. Always wanting to be center of attention, and not wanting to be alone, easily goes from one relationship to another thru manipulation. And holding on to you is just stringing you along.

I hope that by the time you get this, you've stopped allowing her to do this to you. I don't feel she'll change and you'll only get hurt more.

couldn't agree w/ Ddee more. I feel the best thing you can do for yourself is to let her go. If you can recognize clearly that your relationship is all about her and that she never takes time to make conversations about getting to know you.....you have to ask yourself....do you want someone in your life like that? Do you really want a one way relationship and that doesn't care about your needs or never puts your wants and desires ahead of her own? And now you can see writing clearly on the wall in that she is starting to turn friendships against you w/ lies, etc. I think you are getting an even clearer picture of the type of person she is. And it saddens me that rather then being able to see more clearly the type of person she is, you are trying to find fault in yourself. You have to know deep down that you have down nothing wrong. Stop looking for faults in yourself that simply are not there.

Count yourself lucky she is gone. See the situation for what it truly is. And let others know exactly what happened. Those that are worth knowing and friendships that are worth having are going to accept the truth and not judge you!