Leaving My Family

I have been struggling for about two years now with distancing myself from my family nearly entirely. The only two people I care about on my paternal side are my little brother (not close and don't want to be) and my father. I do not want to represent my father nor his family, we differ so drastically and they put me through a lot of traumatic things.. So,..I'm doing all I can to move myself away/out of that muck. I want them to STAY away, forever. Hearing about members of his family stresses me out. Being around them often causes anxiety..

My maternal side has caused a lot of pain however there are more fond memories there than on my Dad's side(way more). They ostracized me growing up and most of them have since apologized.. However, I still do not want to be close to them. I just want to 'check in' here and there through out the years to come.

I'm not posting to seek validation. I would like some pointers(if you have any) as a good way to go about this. My dad's side is easy "ignore" "ignore" and I will tell my dad my decision eventually.

Also, wondering if any of you have done this or something similar? If so..
Did they get angry? Did they lash out? How did you deal with their reaction(s)?

Thank you

This is my way of coping. This is needed in order for me to be at peace.

Sometimes the best way of dealing with a toxic family is to go NC (no contact)
Check out this link;
http://www.lightshouse.org/how-to-go-no ... z2i9uaUq4v

Great link

Mishra2012,


I'm sorry to hear that your family life is the way it is. For right now, if you are really hurting, going NC is probably the best way to go. Toxicity is a terrible thing to go through, I've had to NC one of my cousins and a friend. It's not easy to do but you need to stand up for yourself. Hopefully they will learn that even though you are family, they should not treat you like that.

Personally for me, I don't ever see myself getting back to friendly terms with either. There are only so many times you can forgive someone, and once they cross that line too many times, you have to move on. Your time and life are too precious to be wasted on bad people!

Would be careful posting about this and suspect of any who contact you in confidence. This is a big flashing neon sign to cult recruiters.