Handling HPD in the workplace

What is the best way to deal with manipulative behavior, when it is caught? Once you become aware of this, it is fairly easy to recognize. But then what to you do? Do you call it out, giving attention in that way and risking an explosion of wrath, or do you try to ignore it and continue to be run over and bullied? How far and how hard should one fight back?

I am a 57 year old female who has been employed at the same office for almost 15 years. I would walk out if jobs were not so scarce and I had not invested so much of my life in this job, working myself up to a decent wage. This is a small private organization...too small to come under the jurisdiction of government agencies that require a larger number of employees before they will get involved.

I am being targeted by another female who is the same age that I am and is textbook HPD. I am very sensitive to the behavior because she shares a number of traits that my own mother had, and a number of traits that another woman that I worked with about 20 years ago also had.

After reading up on workplace violence and bullying and its connection to HPD, I had one of those OMG moments that many here speak of. I have worked with this woman for 7 years and the very first thing I noticed about her was the trait of hysterical laughter, laughing at things that are not funny, but just laughing as a response, instead of speaking. This went along with hypochondria. My mother showed these traits the entire time I was growing up and it never got any better, inspite of years and years of doctoring with many different doctors.

Coincidentally, my co-worker mentioned that one of the doctors that she had gone to was the same man that my mother had gone to. He performed gall bladder removal on both of them and even told my dad at the time that he had done this for my mother's "psychological well-being". He did the same surgery years later on my co-worker in the course of an "exploratory surgery". Probably had to have some diagnosis to bill for, huh?

The second trait I recognized was an obsession with sex and bowel movements that the other woman from my past workplace experience had, including the trait of bulimia. I have worked with well over 100 different women in the course of my working career and these 2 are the only ones who subjected their co-workers to this kind of talk, not just incidentally, but regularly. For the current situation, it was nearly daily, informing me of the status of her bowel movements.

I had no idea 7 years ago that these traits were symptoms of HPD until just recently when it all came together and I recognized other traits that point to HPD at the very least, possibly other co-morbid disorders as well.

HPDs can be hard and unfair fighters and can be a little scarey to deal with. I have reported the behavior to my boss who has tried to correct her on it, but she continues to do things when he is not there to witness it. I let things go for years before I finally said something. Now if I report things as they happen, it makes me look like I am the troublemaker.

So, in your experience and opinion, what is the best way to deal with a situation that you know is a set up? Do you call it out or do you fall into the trap no matter what you do?

Hello RKW
Several prior threads have touched on this subject. One of them was

post415339.html?hilit=HPD%20in%20the%20Civilian/Military%20Workplace#p415339

Hopefully there are some additional managers or HPD affected people (self-aware or recovering) or Nons out there who can give you fresh advice. For what it's worth, here is the past material within the thread:

HPD in the civilian and military workplace
by orion8591 » Fri Nov 19, 2010 7:43 pm

This thread created on account of the amazing story within manager's post below, although likely it's already been touched on elsewhere in the forum. Also, the thread "HPD in the military" could be subsumed here, with welcome input from any military management oficers or military families. The civilian or military workplace is the location where we are most likely to encounter active HPDaffected folks (as well as other PD's) and form relationships with them. As seen below, the consequences for organizational morale and productivity are significant. Any managers who have advice for management of HPD in the workplace, please post!
_____________________________________________________________________________________

manager wrote:
I find this fascinating, and would like some advice.
Currently, I have a member of staff who is causing great difficulties in the workplace. In the two years with the company, she has struck up several relationships with male colleagues, mostly those with families. Her behaviour, which initially simply seemed flirtatious and a little inappropriate has become increasingly irrational and destructive.

She has had disciplinary warnings from HR, both for inappropriately revealing clothing and for exceedingly long 'make-up' breaks. Her relationships have also caused work issues, from her persuading male colleagues to take responsibility for her mistakes, to her refusing to work a shift because her boyfriend of the time was not scheduled to work at the same time. She has signed a waiver with HR to not allow a relationship with her supervisor affect her work, but it has had little obvious effect.

She began a relationship with her supervisor shortly after she joined the company - it was secret for nearly a year, until he left his wife (who is also a colleague) and child for her. He says she constantly threatened to harm herself unless he moved in with her. During that year, she also had known relationships with three other men - a single colleague, a married colleague (father of two, who broke it off fairly quickly due to her 'alarming' behaviour) and a previous boyfriend from outside the company. Three weeks after her supervisor moved in with her, she told him their relationship was a mistake, but he has remained living with her, apparantly in the hope of being able to work it out. In the past year, she has developed relationships with two other colleagues, both fathers of a single child each, one married, one separated. The married one, she tried to persuade to leave his family, and when he did not she became very agitated, and now refuses to have anything to do with him, even when in a necessary work capacity. The separated one, she is still seeing. In both cases, she spent a large amount of working hours with them, often on fake work pretences to mend her computer or similar. Her supervisor, who believed her other relationships were platonic until recently, now wishes to return to his family. She has again become very agitated, first threatening to harm herself, and now threatening to bring disciplinary action against her supervisor and his wife.

I believe she should seek help, as this level of manipulative and disruptive behaviour is not that of a 'bit of a flirt' and more of someone with VHPD. Apparantly her father left the family when she was very young (she is an only child), and the minimal contact she has had with him since has been very upsetting for her. She seems to crave constant male attention, and seems to aim to get fathers to leave their children for her. She has no friendly relationships with any female colleagues, and her sole male gay colleague resigned after being unable to cope with her constant hostility.

Is there any way to deal with this kind of behaviour on a professional level? Both her supervisor and the married colleague have asked for managerial help and the board has to find a way of resolving the situation.

Re: HPD in the civilian and military workplace
by manager » Sat Nov 20, 2010 3:15 am

Further similarities to your post that I did not include in my initial description - beautiful woman, 26, acting more like a teenager; wore very low cut, loose fitting and sheer tops; seducing multiple males, chiefly fathers. Interesting about the emotional as opposed to physical seduction - her supervisor said when interviewed by HR about inappropriate behaviour in the workplace that although they shared a bed it was not a sexual relationship before he left his wife (don't know about subsequently), and two of the other discarded men described her as a 'tease'. Fortunately, the men don't seem to have been drawn into conflict with each other too much, despite their extreme proximity in some cases (two are on adjoining desks).

The departments have been reorganised, partly in response to this, with the woman's male line manager (who was unable to moderate her behaviour) being replaced three months ago with a female line manager, with an excellent reputation for people skills. The line manager says it is like trying to deal with a teenager - requests are met with sulky or sullen agreement (improvement on the tantrums with her male line manager), no eye contact, and admonishments lead to 'illness' or dramatic absences - having to be driven to hospital after cutting her hand with a knife, household crises, a car breakdown, or simply going awol. She is keeping just the right side of the line to avoid further disciplinary action. Her threat of counter litigation in the event of disciplinary action is also causing management to treat her with extreme caution.

my reply to Manager was

It's a sad coment on unscrupulous lawyers and the feeble sense of justice that the American legal industry has that you actually had to reorganize your departments and tiptoe around this troubled young woman.

Termination aside, one solution would be to respectfully interview the employee and lay all the cards out on the table, kinda like 'hey Gina, we have a problem and in order to make our workplace function better we would like to work with you and the company mental heath professional. How about it?" Unfortunately, even this merciful solution, where the company kindly puts on a human face and tries to meet the troubled employee halfway (at it's own expense), can unexpectedly draw return fire from the employee and her hired legal guns.

Unless the emplyee changes their behavior, however, things usually come to a head. Once they feel enabled, people suffering from PD's and mental illness can become tyrannical, but when so unrestrained, ultimately they usually go so far off out that the destruction of relationships with family, friends, and employers is sadly a high probablity.

So, a troubled employee loses their livelihood, and the company /organization in the meantime loses a lot of money. Can anyone say the mental health "system" (and her sister, the legal system) doesn't need to be overhauled?

Makes one wonder what surprising anecdotes re HPD affected military personnel or their family members some military managers out there have...?

another member also replied:

Re: HPD in the civilian and military workplace
by connfused and hurt 2 » Sun Nov 21, 2010 11:47 am

My opinion.....the company needs to seek legal advice on how to handle it. Especially if she has threatened to harm herself and threatening others. I believe it is now a legal issue and the company may become legally responsible if this is not dealt with, and allows it to continue and before something possibly happens? Seek legal advice?

Thanks for the reply, orion. There is no answer for this question, though, is there? Do I call her out when I see her doing something manipulative/underhanded/covert or challenge her on a behavior?

Then she explodes and curses at me, which is what she wants to do - let me know how she really feels about me!

Or do just let her manipulate, harass, poke and shirk responsibilities and not say anything at all - suffer in silence and let her get by with things?

How do professionals think HPD should be handled? So much of the advice is aimed at family members and partners, but we at work are easily with the HPD more hours a week than they are.

I am seriously thinking of just separating from my employment and let the cards fall where they may as far as my financial future is concerned.

The book "Emotional Vampires" provide good techniques
how to deal with HPDs, and the thing is it's really easy , author thinks too. buy that book!


laughing at things that are not funny, but just laughing as a response, instead of speaking.

-hpds are masters of appropriate reaction in any situation, we appear perfectly proper....
you can read about it in 'emotional vampires' book too. we don't do 'laughing at things that are not funny' we aren't schizophrenic or something but social queens


is she often late to work?
then it's likely that she has HPD...



-- Mon Jul 30, 2012 12:08 am --

this is a summary:

Histrionic Vampires

Histrionic means dramatic. With these vampires everything’s a show, and what you see is seldom what you get. They crave attention and approval and will do anything to get them, except making good on their promises.



HAMS live to put on a show. If you don't pay enough attention they'll, they'll just shrivel up and die. It will be your fault.
LOOK FOR: Sexual stereotypes, and highly noticeable looks that can change overnight according to whim, or remain the same for years through the magic of cosmetic surgery. Histrionics have big hair, big muscles, big emotions and not the tiniest clue of who they really are.
DRAW YOU IN WITH: Charm, beauty, talent, the promise of sex (often unfulfilled), or whatever else it takes to get noticed, except for substance. DRAIN YOU BY: Needing more maintenance than a classic car or a rare orchid, but having almost nothing to give back save an occasional great performance.
THE ONES YOU SEE EVERY DAY: Celebrity wannabes and drama queens (and kings) whose emotions are a mile wide and an inch deep.
DEFENSIVE STRATEGY: Histrionic lives are soap operas. Watch, but don't join the cast.


PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVES long for approval so much that they hide any part of themselves that anyone would disapprove of, especially anger and sexuality.(YEAH I ALWAYS HIDED ANGER AND SEXUALITY BUT NOW I LEARNED TO SHOW THEM)
LOOK FOR: Bright smiles, blatant denial, and more than a passing resemblance to Barbie or Ken
DRAW YOU IN WITH: Being nice, friendly, cheerful, enthusiastic, brave, clean, and reverent.
DRAIN YOU BY: Attacks that everyone else sees, but they never acknowledge, or by simply being too forgetful to give you what they promise. Or maybe they're sick with some vague and undiagnosible illness.
THE ONES YOU SEE EVERY DAY: People who never get angry themselves, but seem to make everybody else angry. “Unintentional” sexual harassers, Church Ladies who cast stones, pure and perfect anorexics, or anyone else who would never think of doing anything unacceptable.
DEFENSIVE STRATEGY: First and foremost, never try to get Passive-Aggressives to admit to their own motivation; you will only get a headache. Remember that they hunger for approval. Tell them explicitly what it takes to please you and praise them profusely when they do it. The strategy is simple and almost foolproof, but it is seldom employed because it's hard to praise somebody who gives you headaches. Hard as it is, it's far easier than the alternative.

LIVING A SOAP OPERA:
THE HISTRIONIC VAMPIRE CHECKLIST( THIS IS SO ACCURATE IN MY OPINION)
True or false? Score one point for each true answer.
1. THIS PERSON USUALLY STANDS OUT IN A CROWD BY VIRTUE OF LOOKS, DRESS, OR PERSONALITY.
2. THIS PERSON IS FRIENDLY, ENTHUSIASTIC, ENTERTAINING AND ABSOLUTELY WONDERFUL IN SOCIAL SITUATIONS.(BELIEVE ME I AM ABSOLUTELY WONDERFUL IN SOCIAL SITUATIONS-RL)
3. THIS PERSON TREATS SUPERFICIAL ACQUAINTANCES AS IF THEY WERE CLOSE FRIENDS.
4. THIS PERSON MAY BECOME VISIBLY UPSET WHEN FORCED TO SHARE THE CENTER OF ATTENTION.
5. THIS PERSON FREQUENTLY CHANGES HIS OR HER STYLE OF DRESS AND OVERALL LOOK.
6. THIS PERSON LOVES TO TALK, GOSSIP, AND TELL STORIES.
7. THE STORIES USUALLY BECOME MORE EXAGGERATED AND DRAMATIC WITH EACH RETELLING.
8. THIS PERSON HAS A GOOD FASHION SENSE, BUT PERHAPS A BIT TOO MUCH CONCERN WITH HIS OR HER APPEARANCE.
9. THIS PERSON CAN BECOME VERY UPSET OVER RELATIVELY SMALL SOCIAL SLIGHTS.
10. THIS PERSON SELDOM ADMITS TO BEING ANGRY, EVEN WHEN HIS OR HER ANGER IS QUITE APPARENT TO OTHER PEOPLE.
11.THIS PERSON HAS VERY LITTLE MEMORY FOR DAY TO DAY DETAILS.
12. THIS PERSON BELIEVES IN SUPERNATURAL ENTITIES, LIKE ANGELS, DEITIES, OR BENEVOLENT SPIRITS WHO REGULARLY INTERVENE IN EVERYDAY LIFE.
13. THIS PERSON HAS ONE OR MORE UNUSUAL AILMENT THAT COMES AND GOES ACCORDING TO NO DISCERNABLE PATTERN.
14. THIS PERSON HAS SOME PROBLEMS DOING REGULAR CHORES LIKE PAPERWORK, HOUSECLEANING, OR PAYING BILLS.
15. THIS PERSON HAS BEEN KNOWN TO GET SICK TO AVOID DOING SOMETHING UNPLEASANT.
16. THIS PERSON FERVENTLY FOLLOWS SEVERAL TELEVISION SHOWS OR SPORTS TEAMS.
17. THIS PERSON'S COMMUNICATION, THOUGH HIGHLY COLORED, IS OFTEN INDIRECT AND VAGUE.
18. THIS PERSON REQUIRES MORE MAINTENANCE THAN A RARE ORCHID, BUT BELIEVES HE OR SHE IS THE EASIEST PERSON IN THE WORLD TO GET ALONG WITH.
19. THIS PERSON OFTEN SEEMS SEDUCTIVE, WHETHER HE OR SHE WOULD ADMIT TO IT OR NOT.
20. DESPITE ALL THE PROBLEMS, THIS PERSON IS ALWAYS IN DEMAND, AND MORE POPULAR THAN I COULD EVER HOPE TO BE.

^ABOVE IS FROM
http://www.albernstein.com/id58.htm

reddykilowatt wrote:Thanks for the reply, orion. There is no answer for this question, though, is there? Do I call her out when I see her doing something manipulative/underhanded/covert or challenge her on a behavior?

Then she explodes and curses at me, which is what she wants to do - let me know how she really feels about me!

Or do just let her manipulate, harass, poke and shirk responsibilities and not say anything at all - suffer in silence and let her get by with things?

How do professionals think HPD should be handled? So much of the advice is aimed at family members and partners, but we at work are easily with the HPD more hours a week than they are.

I am seriously thinking of just separating from my employment and let the cards fall where they may as far as my financial future is concerned.

I would be like yYyYy suggested...do not get emotionally involved in the drama, hide your personal buttons.

A probable HPD person I know used to come to work in a professional office with over 50% or the surface area of her body exposed, wearing super short skirts like girls wear to clubs on Friday / Saturday night. Not sure but I believe management wrote her up and told her to dress more business-like. She was pissed, but in her case she was able to suck it up and change her wardrobe.
She would also kill a lot of time chatting with people in high places, and sometimes sneak out and take double her daily allotted break time.
In this case what seemed to work is an enforcing the already existing admin rules: she had to do her own work, others weren't going to carry her...when she was away on vacation or out sick no one took over her work...that way if her productivity was low it could be tied to her.

Of course, maintaining a paper trail of any incidents and disturbances is crucial. If your company has a lawyer I would seek advice at the proper time.

Give her an opportunity to straighten out and support any positive changes she makes, but...even in these days If anyone goes too far and you have the paperwork, then you can eventually terminate them.

yYyYy wrote:The book "Emotional Vampires" provide good techniques
how to deal with HPDs, and the thing is it's really easy , author thinks too. buy that book!


laughing at things that are not funny, but just laughing as a response, instead of speaking.

-hpds are masters of appropriate reaction in any situation, we appear perfectly proper....
you can read about it in 'emotional vampires' book too. we don't do 'laughing at things that are not funny' we aren't schizophrenic or something but social queens


is she often late to work?
then it's likely that she has HPD...



-- Mon Jul 30, 2012 12:08 am --

this is a summary:

Histrionic Vampires

Histrionic means dramatic. With these vampires everything’s a show, and what you see is seldom what you get. They crave attention and approval and will do anything to get them, except making good on their promises.



HAMS live to put on a show. If you don't pay enough attention they'll, they'll just shrivel up and die. It will be your fault.
LOOK FOR: Sexual stereotypes, and highly noticeable looks that can change overnight according to whim, or remain the same for years through the magic of cosmetic surgery. Histrionics have big hair, big muscles, big emotions and not the tiniest clue of who they really are.
DRAW YOU IN WITH: Charm, beauty, talent, the promise of sex (often unfulfilled), or whatever else it takes to get noticed, except for substance. DRAIN YOU BY: Needing more maintenance than a classic car or a rare orchid, but having almost nothing to give back save an occasional great performance.
THE ONES YOU SEE EVERY DAY: Celebrity wannabes and drama queens (and kings) whose emotions are a mile wide and an inch deep.
DEFENSIVE STRATEGY: Histrionic lives are soap operas. Watch, but don't join the cast.


PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVES long for approval so much that they hide any part of themselves that anyone would disapprove of, especially anger and sexuality.(YEAH I ALWAYS HIDED ANGER AND SEXUALITY BUT NOW I LEARNED TO SHOW THEM)
LOOK FOR: Bright smiles, blatant denial, and more than a passing resemblance to Barbie or Ken
DRAW YOU IN WITH: Being nice, friendly, cheerful, enthusiastic, brave, clean, and reverent.
DRAIN YOU BY: Attacks that everyone else sees, but they never acknowledge, or by simply being too forgetful to give you what they promise. Or maybe they're sick with some vague and undiagnosible illness.
THE ONES YOU SEE EVERY DAY: People who never get angry themselves, but seem to make everybody else angry. “Unintentional” sexual harassers, Church Ladies who cast stones, pure and perfect anorexics, or anyone else who would never think of doing anything unacceptable.
DEFENSIVE STRATEGY: First and foremost, never try to get Passive-Aggressives to admit to their own motivation; you will only get a headache. Remember that they hunger for approval. Tell them explicitly what it takes to please you and praise them profusely when they do it. The strategy is simple and almost foolproof, but it is seldom employed because it's hard to praise somebody who gives you headaches. Hard as it is, it's far easier than the alternative.

LIVING A SOAP OPERA:
THE HISTRIONIC VAMPIRE CHECKLIST( THIS IS SO ACCURATE IN MY OPINION)
True or false? Score one point for each true answer.
1. THIS PERSON USUALLY STANDS OUT IN A CROWD BY VIRTUE OF LOOKS, DRESS, OR PERSONALITY.
2. THIS PERSON IS FRIENDLY, ENTHUSIASTIC, ENTERTAINING AND ABSOLUTELY WONDERFUL IN SOCIAL SITUATIONS.(BELIEVE ME I AM ABSOLUTELY WONDERFUL IN SOCIAL SITUATIONS-RL)
3. THIS PERSON TREATS SUPERFICIAL ACQUAINTANCES AS IF THEY WERE CLOSE FRIENDS.
4. THIS PERSON MAY BECOME VISIBLY UPSET WHEN FORCED TO SHARE THE CENTER OF ATTENTION.
5. THIS PERSON FREQUENTLY CHANGES HIS OR HER STYLE OF DRESS AND OVERALL LOOK.
6. THIS PERSON LOVES TO TALK, GOSSIP, AND TELL STORIES.
7. THE STORIES USUALLY BECOME MORE EXAGGERATED AND DRAMATIC WITH EACH RETELLING.
8. THIS PERSON HAS A GOOD FASHION SENSE, BUT PERHAPS A BIT TOO MUCH CONCERN WITH HIS OR HER APPEARANCE.
9. THIS PERSON CAN BECOME VERY UPSET OVER RELATIVELY SMALL SOCIAL SLIGHTS.
10. THIS PERSON SELDOM ADMITS TO BEING ANGRY, EVEN WHEN HIS OR HER ANGER IS QUITE APPARENT TO OTHER PEOPLE.
11.THIS PERSON HAS VERY LITTLE MEMORY FOR DAY TO DAY DETAILS.
12. THIS PERSON BELIEVES IN SUPERNATURAL ENTITIES, LIKE ANGELS, DEITIES, OR BENEVOLENT SPIRITS WHO REGULARLY INTERVENE IN EVERYDAY LIFE.
13. THIS PERSON HAS ONE OR MORE UNUSUAL AILMENT THAT COMES AND GOES ACCORDING TO NO DISCERNABLE PATTERN.
14. THIS PERSON HAS SOME PROBLEMS DOING REGULAR CHORES LIKE PAPERWORK, HOUSECLEANING, OR PAYING BILLS.
15. THIS PERSON HAS BEEN KNOWN TO GET SICK TO AVOID DOING SOMETHING UNPLEASANT.
16. THIS PERSON FERVENTLY FOLLOWS SEVERAL TELEVISION SHOWS OR SPORTS TEAMS.
17. THIS PERSON'S COMMUNICATION, THOUGH HIGHLY COLORED, IS OFTEN INDIRECT AND VAGUE.
18. THIS PERSON REQUIRES MORE MAINTENANCE THAN A RARE ORCHID, BUT BELIEVES HE OR SHE IS THE EASIEST PERSON IN THE WORLD TO GET ALONG WITH.
19. THIS PERSON OFTEN SEEMS SEDUCTIVE, WHETHER HE OR SHE WOULD ADMIT TO IT OR NOT.
20. DESPITE ALL THE PROBLEMS, THIS PERSON IS ALWAYS IN DEMAND, AND MORE POPULAR THAN I COULD EVER HOPE TO BE.

I have heard quite a bit about this book, yY, but have not read it. The description list is so accurate it is uncanny. You cannot believe the chaos she has caused in our office. Off to amazon I go, again! Thanks!

orion8591 wrote:I would be like yYyYy suggested...do not get emotionally involved in the drama, hide your personal buttons.

A probable HPD person I know used to come to work in a professional office with over 50% or the surface area of her body exposed, wearing super short skirts like girls wear to clubs on Friday / Saturday night. Not sure but I believe management wrote her up and told her to dress more business-like. She was pissed, but in her case she was able to suck it up and change her wardrobe.
She would also kill a lot of time chatting with people in high places, and sometimes sneak out and take double her daily allotted break time.
In this case what seemed to work is an enforcing the already existing admin rules: she had to do her own work, others weren't going to carry her...when she was away on vacation or out sick no one took over her work...that way if her productivity was low it could be tied to her.

Of course, maintaining a paper trail of any incidents and disturbances is crucial. If your company has a lawyer I would seek advice at the proper time.

Give her an opportunity to straighten out and support any positive changes she makes, but...even in these days If anyone goes too far and you have the paperwork, then you can eventually terminate them.

She has been punishing me for close to 5 years because I spoke out about being absolutely sick and tired of hearing about her bowel movements and sex life daily for 4 years. It seems like she read one of those articles about workplace etiquette and proceded to do everything they say not to do.

Now that I know about HPD, it seems like she's read all the symptoms and is exhibiting them. That is how close these types of lists describe her. But I know she does not read!

I have a terrible tendency to let my buttons be pushed, so I will try to work on that...but OCD-like repetitious rude behavior has gone on and on and on. I let it go multiple times, years at a time, then explode, not believing how anyone could not know how rude it is. Then I think I should have said something earlier, but I know that wouldn't have helped. She is also kind of like Oppositional Defiant Disorder.

Then she says how much she hates rude people! Oh how I wish we had a company lawyer! This would not have progressed for so long. All the books I read say ultimately, you must separate from the abuser.

My boss has a fear of having to pay out unemployment, so he is very lenient, very unstructured. Believe me, she has done more than enough to be fired. He has never fired anyone. We never had a workplace manual, but he says we will shortly.

I have begun a new policy of never being alone with her, because this is her MO, to do things when there is only one witness, usually me. But the other co-worker has seen some pretty bizarre behavior, too. This one was her targeted friend, a new hire 5 years ago, who was instantly turned against me - until she found herself doing half of the HPD's work.

Some of this is so severe, I am beginning to think that along with the manipulation, the attention seeking, the seductiveness and provoking co-workers who do not praise you, we may be dealing with a DID or multiple. I've got my reasons for thinking so, but of course am not qualified to make an actual diagnosis.