wasted talent thanks to HPD

One of biggest cause of my depression would be my wasted academic talent
i am sucking in the school lately though it's getting better little by little
til like age 15 i was really smart, i was always top at the school,
my sat was 2250/2400 even though i could not make one correct english sentence til age 16,(never learned to speak/write in English)
and i speak 4 languages fluently and I used to win national scale awards,

then things started to break down from high school years,
and I try to study, details never get into my head,
even if it's quite easy, you literally read it, and it's like reading a blank paper
nothing is registered to your head, right now in college i get like C in really easy course idk,(well though can't blame this on hpd completely... lol but idk some courses i do well even though it's difficult but some ijust don't want to do.) your thought process get all scattered, whatever you write is so scattered...
and you become a not good leader for you always end projects f*cked up,
ahhh the projects, activities i f*cked up after starting with great enthusiasm... i feel sorry to members cuz i was a baddd leader


i feel embarrassed, bc i couldn't fufill those expectations on me of others,
other studens who were far less intelligent than me went to ivy leagues,
idk i don't have jealousy over that
i am satisfied right now,

but i feel it's bit unfair, cuz i studied real hard throughout my life sacrificing everything,
i am not even pretty even though being hpd, damn
i am hpd who is just full of 'i am sick' complaints(terrible!)
then my academic talent is just wasted thanks to having hpd, ppl look upon me, everyone think i am stupid
*Scratches head*
though still there's hope of success
but as an Asian,
school thing kind of matters
though i am still in quite priviliged university
i am sucking at it. my gpa real low :p
i sometimes think 'how come i ended up like this?'
you have no idea if how much I tried hard throughout most of my life,
but idk it ended up like this after lots of
sexual harassment sues, failed projects, relationship problems etcetcetc.....

again i want to ask, how come, the only thing god presented me was academic talent
and how come he take it away from me like this?
:/

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PR4KpPAA-8A

yeah! soulfly XD

yYyYy wrote:and i speak 4 languages fluently and I used to win national scale awards

Do you get to use this skill in college? If not, then college is wasting your talent.

anagram wrote:

yYyYy wrote:and i speak 4 languages fluently and I used to win national scale awards

Do you use this skill in college? If not, then college is wasting your talent.

my school is best place for me i think! i read books/write papers in two of my fluent foreign languages. and i am learning new languages in college! but my current academic ability is so impressively failure. so impressivle failure.
my counsellor said it seems like i have a learning disablity right now LOL
i often express my ideas in super disorganzed way in front of her and sometimes really weird things happen. once i was extremely stressed out then i asked 4 digit password to omy friend
and she told me and during that day i asked her like 50 times again,
cuz icouldn't remember that 4 digit password! 4365 like thing, i will ask her again every 10 minutes
it was FUNNY even to me how can i forget that like that completely right after i heard it i couldn't even remember the first number
and i would forget my id numbers and phone number and... ppl said i am CRAZY! but when i got extremely stressed out it happened

failure, failure, yyy failure...

Have you ever been treated for ADHD or anything? I still don't know if I believe it exists as a separate condition, but I've heard people saying that it helped them when they treated it as such.

Hi YYY

But you said it's getting better, bit by bit...if so focus your mental powers on how you have been doing better lately.

Always knew you were smart, from all that rapid absorption of Millon

Here in the US Asian American students are also known for perfection and achieving 4.0 at all costs...evidently a cultural value transcending that big and deep Pacific.

But if you push too hard you can squeeze the life out of school....maybe the answer is a balance of diligent hard work and inspiration....studying something you like?