How do HPD women generally behave/react towards other women

MissAli, my explanation was sincere.

I was only reponding to your posts before Expressive called me a troll. Like I said.."If" any one is...meaning neither one of us, were trolling.

I don't think you were trolling at all.

I deserve to be treated with as much respect , as you are requesting.

And I certify, that you will be :0).

I'm sorry if I came across as crass. I am just trying to learn both sides of my diagnosis, and don't feel the love on the HPD site as much as I've found the open arms of the BPD forum. That's okay though. I will find a balance for myself.

I do appreciate your kind comments on the other thread though. I really do! :0)

AMP

MissAli,

I think in the past there was alot of conflict. It seems to have scared alot of HPD's off and now this site suffers, as a result. At this point, I believe it is in the past and now it is not as big an issue, as some people continue to say it is.

Hopefully that poor "reputation" of this HPD forum will go away. Again, alot of the same posters aren't here anymore.

Welcome to the HPD forum!

If you wonder why I still post here. It is because I have a court date to put a restaining order on my Ex diagnosed HPD. I am trying to understand the disorder, so I can insure the order goes through and to possibly understand what may happen if it does or doesn't go through.

OK

Ok---

Wow. I'm really sorry to hear that. What do you think you're going to do? You should not be denied an order just because she was diagnosed? I do not think a court judge would find that she is excused from reckless behavior? Or, I should say I would not THINK so. I don't have a lot of expertise in that area.

Hell, I only work at a bank and do investments, LOL!

Can I be nosy and ask what she did?

AMP

Okay, everybody hug now (giggle)

Expressive wrote: Okay, everybody hug now (giggle)

Big hug to you too, all is forgiven!

MissAli wrote: Wow. I'm really sorry to hear that. What do you think you're going to do? You should not be denied an order just because she was diagnosed? I do not think a court judge would find that she is excused from reckless behavior? Or, I should say I would not THINK so. I don't have a lot of expertise in that area.

Hell, I only work at a bank and do investments, LOL!

Hey Ali, I am not a lawyer either. But when it comes to court you never know what might happen. Look at OJ Simpson.

I have been more than patient with my ex, but she has left me no choice. The pollce even called her to ask her to stop, but she still didn't. Now she is harrassing my current girlffriend. So I have no choice, but to go forward. My main concern is not just being successful, but will she stop? I just want her to leave me peace.

Hopefully the restraining order will work!

It's fatal attraction at it's worse! lol It is extreme!

I think in a way it is a lot easier to have sympathy for a Borderline than for a HPD (or any other form of PD). The borderline is so obviously self-destructive, that you can really feel for her.... and I don't think borderlines necessarily have this "nasty" side of cheating, stealing other women's man, etc... (although they might have other stuff that makes it difficult to relate to them or live with them).

Seems that my HPD seems to be particularly unpleasant, maybe she has a few narcissistic traits as well... the peacocking in the street, the "oh, I am so important, so intelligent, so attractive" manierism... the arrogance and hautiness when feeling threatened... etc... it seems to me she is also particularly empty inside, b/c she is changing looks like a chameleon... and she seems to spend a lot of time in front of the mirror grooming herself. When she was younger, she was a punk (all pierced and neon hair), later she was a feminist (growing her moustache and her armpits and dressing in a rug), now she is "posh and looking for social prominence" spending a fortune on hair extensions, clothes, meticulously combed, died and waxed.... well, what will she be in the future? You just wonder how her child feels about this constant and changing masquerade going on... in any case you cannot trust her - neither as a man dating her (she'd dump you without a scrupule if she found someone better looking, better earning, etc. and then would try to take you back when it didn't work out with the other guy) nor as a woman (watch out your boyfriend or husband, especially if he is good looking, popular or good earning...)....

I love the hugs and resolution that we all just came to on this post! I'm having a REALLY hard morning (my mother has really given me a lot to be self-conscious about, see BPD thread), but that just made this morning a BIT brighter! Thank you!!!

Ok, I really feel for you. I do think that the restraining order will put some "oomph" behind the threats, and if the police have already asked her to back off, and she hasn't, this is truly your only option. I feel for you, and hope you keep us updated. I'll be thinking of you. :0)

As for the latest post, I think she is having a MAJOR identity crisis, but this is probably one that you do NOT want to get involved with... like you said, she'll drop you for the next best thing... I guess the only thing you can hope for is that she drops you long enough to forget about you after the next one doesn't work out?

I'm new to this, so I don't probably have the best advice. However, I can see how hurtful this disorder can be. I guess if I didn't have quite the overture of needing affection/attention/validation so much, I wouldn't have this HPD factor.

AMP

As far as my wife goes, she had a couple of very good friends when we started dating. They were party girls like her and when she decided to get serious with me, after 2 weeks, she dumped them both. I was kind of surprised at how quickly and easily she disposed of them. That sent up a red flag for me, but I ignored it.
Both of her friends drank too much, had bleached blonde hair, and were quite promiscuous.

Then, 5 years into our marriage after I had given her the kids she wanted and built the house she wanted, she "dumped" me for her new best friend. We were still married but she devoted all of her attention to her new friend.
Her new friend drank too much. She was a party girl. She was loud and obnoxious. Needless to say, when my wife was around her she acted the same way. I was very unhappy with this and told her that we needed to work on our marriage and family. She said "I only care about me," and "things change, get over it."

Well, she and her new friend would end up fighting over who's kids were smarter or better looking. They would fall out and she would have a new best friend.
6 months later she would have another best friend.
The cycle went on and on.
She would be very nice to her "best friend," and then bash her mercilessly behind her back.

Also, as info, my wife spends hours on her appearance. If we were going out to dinner, she would need 4 hours to get ready.

some really interesting views here

I get the impression that the older HPD person gets, the more supply this person needs. So there is a tendency to act more seductively at times of insufficient supply.