Unattractive/Overweight HPDs

I've seen a lot of mention about HPDs being so sexual or sensual, using their bodies for attention. But what about women who are unattractive or overweight? How do they get attention?

The one thing that absolutely doesn't fit my mom is this sexual behavior. She's always been overly shy about her sexuality, often claiming to be "hit on" or told she was "so sexy" but not wanting the attention or fielding it elsewhere. Throughout my adolescence and into adulthood, anytime I talked about sex or sexual relations of any kind with her, she would make it seem like having sex with more than two or three people in your lifetime made you a slut. She has never dressed provocatively. She has always exuded a lot of sexual charisma, particularly when dancing, though.

In her youth she was very thin (though she had a muscular body so she was never that thin), and in her thirties she was a little heavier, but still what any doctor would say was "healthy weight". About twelve years ago, though, she suddenly ballooned, and now she's obese.

I've mentioned elsewhere (see here: http://psychforums.com/viewtopic.php?p=203975&highlight=#203975) that she has this phantom illness that came out of nowhere. It came about at the same time that she ballooned in weight. At the time, she had me convinced that the sudden weight gain was due to this illness she'd suddenly acquired. (She had no symptoms other than rapid weight gain.) They tested her thyroid and countless other things, but came up with nothing: She was healthy as an ox. Now, in looking back, I wonder if her metabolism just suddenly started slowing down (combined with that she stopped playing softball) and she created an illness to explain it, as a way of garnering attention that she'd suddenly stopped receiving now that she wasn't as thin as she used to be. (She still gets attention from men, but it's mostly due to her bubbly personality, not her looks...and it's a lot rarer than she tells people and herself.)

I guess my main question is, for HPDs who are overweight or unattractive (or have other personality issues that would make them shun sexual attention), would they turn to somatic illnesses as a way of garnering that attention?

I don't have a simple (or perhaps even direct) answer for that. But if I consider it I find myself coming back to how basically people will always love being told what they want to hear, and how they'll eventually see only what they want to see. With that in mind I don't know if a HPD who's considered unattractive would need to display any different traits than one who's looked upon as being attractive.

When you're with someone who presents the visage of everything that appeals to you, and who knows what makes you 'tick' it can be difficult to walk away from them. So while what's thought of as 'attractive' is subjective, I believe that the usual potent tactics of the HPD overrides any perceived physical shortcomings - they have plenty of the tools they need at their disposal, regardless.

I've read that an HPD can use other means to get attention.........


-----faking or exagerrating illness.........

----being the funny one........

----acting like a great leader or teacher.......

-----being the matchmaker........


--------actress.......... singer...........

-----anything that brings lots of "fans" or "friends" or lovers......

Like Harry said and Wiser points out, they have a load of arsenals that they can use if they cannot physically attract. I used to watch my HPD at work and often when her charm failed, then she would try her sense of humor, then false compassion...always waiting for a chance to win someone over

They say that HPD are "sexual", but it's somewhat misleading since in reality HPD is not about sex at all. It's all about getting attention, and being sexual is just an easy way to get people's attention with minimal effort. My mother for example is the eternal martyr. She will try to get people through sob stories, be they real or invented.

I agree with Peptron.
I have some one in my family like that too.

Taylorpie,

I think they should officially come up with names for the different types of HPD...............and maybe they have for all I know....

1. Beauty Queen HPD

2. I'm so much fun! HPD

3. Big Mamma HPD

4. I think I'm dying HPD

5. I know Everything HPD

6. I could have been Elizabeth Taylor HPD

7. The World Traveler HPD

8. I'm Always Sick........HPD

Etc.Etc......



P.S. Taylorpie...........I'm happily married....and I'm 60
something....but I must say.....
your photo is stunning..........and yet you
don't sound HPD at all..........I believe
you're the star in that family.......