Divorced from Histrionic One year - Two Children

Hello all, after reading this forum, I feel so much better about my situation, because I can relate to so many of the stories here.

I however have two children who are now 6 and 4 so no contact is not an option.

My counsler mentioned about a year ago that she thought the Ex was histrionic and this is the best forum on the subject so far.

A few examples of my wifes behavior.

Always dressed in revealing way. Never appropriate for the occasion and seem to be preturbed when I ask her to dress down for social events like a corporate pary.

Excessive Make-up

No ability to see consequeses of action. No fore thought at all. zero.

No sense of time.

Zero problem solving ability

Listens to whoever is talking with her and believes anything - athough it is always black and white.

always looking for approval.

Obsesive compulsive - spend days doing laundry (and do a great job) while the house crumbles around her.

She left me, the kids, the dog and her cat of 15 years for the love of her life. 8 months later, while I was away for the weekend, she moved back in. When I told her no, she said, "but I moved all my stuff in?"

I finally got her to sign all the divorce papers on my terms, by being more stubborn and avoiding confrontation.

In between boyfriends, she always tries to come back, sometimes more successfuly than others. I can't have no contact because of kids. I feel like I am getting sucked into her crazy world at times, like I want the drama?

She did recently get engaged to an equally dramatic person. he keeps her on a tight leash, but he is not much for step dad material. And she still calls and tells me she is thinking about me? WTF.

I guess I dont have a solid question but would appreciate thought on how to handle my conversations with her.

thanks and bless everyone here

ss

We have joint custody, but I have them 75% of the time or whenever she has the mildest conflict.

It seems I do all the heavy lifting, but that started when I wrote her senior year exam papers. Should have seen it comming.

ss

I'm pleased you have your dear little one's 75% of the time. If you can get 100% all the better.

The outcome of little children with a histrionic mother is not a good prognosis. She has the ability to hinder their emotional well-being and maturity and it does affect the healthiness of their adult relationships.

I'm the X of a diagnosed NPD, and I have 100% custody of our little 4 year old. NOt that he's tried, but she refuses to stay overnight with him. She always wants to come home, and (thankfully) he's not forcing her to stay.

You should be commended for your commitment to your children. Bless you.

Distance.

Your life with her is over.

Accept it.

Embrace it!

Look to the future for you and your children and leave her in the past.

She is disordered. She will say anything. She will do anything to get instant gratification regardless of consequence. You know this to be true.

You will only get drawn back in if you allow yourself to. You will have no one to blame except yourself.

So stand up, straighten your back and act like you've got a pair! Just like you did while going through your divorce and getting her to sign the papers. You are in control.