HPD and Love/Crushes

Wow, what a great post. Thank you for sharing and i wanted to chime in on something other people also commented and discussed.

I ended up in an affair with an engaged woman and it felt just like a competition. I HAD TO WIN. The end was brutal to me as she left me immediately for a 3rd guy and the research of that whole relationship caused me to become self-aware of my condition. She on the other hand nails everything for somebody with BPD.

To answer your question....i did truly love my BPD woman. However, i don't know if that was only temporary and if it would have changed once i have "won" her completely.

The thing that i did notice and I'm glad about is discovering myself.

You should embrace your HPD and use it to accomplish goals that matter to you. Whoever happens to be in your life can enjoy the ride, as long as you let them..being aware of your conduction will help you not hurt them and do the right thing.

I know I'm sick but I'm not gonna let "normal" people beat me into ground. No screw that. If need be i will use my manipulation to get what i want. Why wouldn't we, we are different, special, it gives us an advantage normal people don't have. So true answer to your question is to fall in love with a goal that is certainly built deep inside of you.

My personal goal is to be rich(how cliche) but for me its not a pipe dream.