What means HPD like negative attention?

If you mistreat her they like this?

It means they get noticed cause they create a stir (like a controversy) that gets everyone talking. They enjoy the negative attention cause it puts them in the spotlight.

If nobody will like you, then make them hate you (which hurts though), because that is better than being an invisible nobody (which hurts even worse).

Which is why I always thrived on negative attention. I can tell you what the root of it was for me. Being ignored and unloved as a child (and rejected) at home, acting out got me noticed. Getting yelled at by my mom instead of just being invisible and ignored. It was the same at school.

blank wrote:If nobody will like you, then make them hate you (which hurts though), because that is better than being an invisible nobody (which hurts even worse).

Which is why I always thrived on negative attention. I can tell you what the root of it was for me. Being ignored and unloved as a child (and rejected) at home, acting out got me noticed. Getting yelled at by my mom instead of just being invisible and ignored. It was the same at school.

Got to admit, I am also curious about this experience. For me, I chose an opposite path. My mom was almost always negative (left handed compliments at best), and yelling hurt too, so I ended up preferring solitude, or time spent away from home, and now more generally cherish moments of quiet (nobody is demanding anything of me, yea!)

Curious if this is an innate personality difference, a difference in messages heard, or some of both.

for example if your boyfriend is angry with you is better than being indifferent.so i totally get that.
if he is jealous ,dramatic ,angry with the things i do, i feel that he cares more than when he is indifferent or doesn't react at all ,he doesn't care and is boring.i think even nons can understand that in some degree.
if i create drama and you react you are enabler and pds are attracted to enablers.
or when someone pretends he is sick and when is your family you hate them and want to move out but when is your friend "aawww he wants me to notice him." eeehh
but hpd is about them having attention and not you.maybe if you get to be bigger drama queen than them they will get jealous eventually. lol and compete and leave.
but generally i could never do the negative attention to others because i feel that they will reject me or i am a burden more .so attention doesn't feel like love when i get it this way.it feels like indifference and abandonment. (except maybe if i knew i could manipulate someone who likes it this way on purpose.)
i think my avoidance and introversion is way bigger than my jealousy for attention.
i saw scenes from reality tv and it feels these people must love attention usually to do that.
what about when you are famous for no good reason. except that you had 243242 plastic surgeries to be pretty and drama.i am jealous that they can make money this way sometimes.but if i was rich i wouldn't care

-- Fri Aug 18, 2017 3:46 pm --

every non can understand wanting your boyfriend to be jealous than being indifferent maybe. i think in disorder it goes beyond just boyfriend but to everyone to the point of what the ###$

-- Fri Aug 18, 2017 3:49 pm --

or if you have empathy there is a limit in what you can do for attention. but if you put your need for attention over empathy. you could even hurt others to get it. it doesn't make sense to you why you can' t hurt others . all you care about is attention. is the time when you lack empathy

JoseMaria wrote:If you mistreat her they like this?

I think for the HPD there can be a sense of power derived from seeing someone else's emotional reaction, which they are the cause of.

julllia wrote: every non can understand wanting your boyfriend to be jealous than being indifferent maybe.

Interesting. Yes, I agree, that is understandable.

Of course there is a cost, hurt feelings that add up, but yea, my ex definitely equated high emotions with caring. I do give her kudos though for also learning, long term it works better to cool off vs saying something that cannot be taken back. It's a demonstration of caring too, just not so immediate.

There is a good thread about this topic here:

histrionic-personality/topic93885.html

julllia wrote:for example if your boyfriend is angry with you is better than being indifferent.so i totally get that.
if he is jealous ,dramatic ,angry with the things i do, i feel that he cares more than when he is indifferent or doesn't react at all ,he doesn't care and is boring.i think even nons can understand that in some degree.
if i create drama and you react you are enabler and pds are attracted to enablers.
or when someone pretends he is sick and when is your family you hate them and want to move out but when is your friend "aawww he wants me to notice him." eeehh
but hpd is about them having attention and not you.maybe if you get to be bigger drama queen than them they will get jealous eventually. lol and compete and leave.
but generally i could never do the negative attention to others because i feel that they will reject me or i am a burden more .so attention doesn't feel like love when i get it this way.it feels like indifference and abandonment. (except maybe if i knew i could manipulate someone who likes it this way on purpose.)
i think my avoidance and introversion is way bigger than my jealousy for attention.
i saw scenes from reality tv and it feels these people must love attention usually to do that.
what about when you are famous for no good reason. except that you had 243242 plastic surgeries to be pretty and drama.i am jealous that they can make money this way sometimes.but if i was rich i wouldn't care

-- Fri Aug 18, 2017 3:46 pm --

every non can understand wanting your boyfriend to be jealous than being indifferent maybe. i think in disorder it goes beyond just boyfriend but to everyone to the point of what the ###$

-- Fri Aug 18, 2017 3:49 pm --

or if you have empathy there is a limit in what you can do for attention. but if you put your need for attention over empathy. you could even hurt others to get it. it doesn't make sense to you why you can' t hurt others . all you care about is attention. is the time when you lack empathy

Wow!
I'm surprised
I think an HPD would want you to react to your attempts to make me jealous by doing the same to them for example by telling you about other girls
Not getting angry for that, showing me insecure then you say that argue when a HPD want make me jealous is better?

Excuseme my english dont is my native tongue.

xdude wrote:

julllia wrote:but yea, my ex definitely equated high emotions with caring.

That's pretty much it. But barring that, any attention is better than none.

.