I don't know who/what I am *new here*

I don't know if this post belongs to this thread but I think my personality problem relates to it somehow.. anyways.. as the title says, I don't know who i am. I'll try to make this short.

Since I was around 7 years old (I'm now 23), I always wished to be like other people. Whoever I liked or admired, I wanted to be like.. especially tv/movie characters. I started realizing this when I was around 13, but I didn't make much of it. Fast forward to now, 10 years later, it's driving me nuts. I hate it. I don't know who I am.. I'm always trying to act or copy people from tv shows, movies, even acquittances, people I know of, people on instagram, etc. For example, the other day I was watching a french movie and wanted to act and be exactly like the main character. The next day I say an instagram post of some girl (complete opposite of the french movie character) and then i wanted to mimic how she took pictures, how she dressed, and even looked her up on twitter to see what she thinks/says so I can kind of mold myself to that person. they don't have things in common or anything in particular, I just see something I like from that person, then she becomes my new "personality".. This has been going on FOR YEARS.. it never changes.. everyday I just find someone else to be like.. today I don't have anyone in particular in my mind, so I feel lost on who I am or what to be.. my interests/hobbies change all the time. I've done everything that my "role model" at the moment does, but as soon as it changes, the interests/hobbies change too. this means I've wasted a lot of money on things I never finish.. I've finally decided to reach out and talk about it.

A little bit about me: I have a loving family, never had any "traumatic" experiences, had a very good life, I live with my boyfriend who loves me dearly, and i'm about to graduate college, I also have a job. However I don't have friends since 2 1/5 yrs ago.. I used to have 5 best friends who I used to hang out with every single day. We used to party all the time, but slowly some started to drift away until there were just two of us.. the one who treated me the worst and me.. sometime later I confronted her on how she treated me and she really hurt my feelings by rejecting me and telling me what she really thought about me. that was the end of our friendship.. since then I haven't been able to make any friends. I talk to some girls and they don't seem to be interested in forming a new friendship with me. I have almost 2000 followers on instagram and I always get tons of comments and likes, however no one seems to want to really get to know me (which proves how social media "friends" aren't really friends).
Sometimes when I'm out with people, or working, or simply distracted, I forget about all this.. as soon as i have some time alone I start obsessively thinking about my next "personality"..

sorry if it's too long. If this doesn't belong to this category/thread please let me know. hope someone can shed some light on what's happening to me..

Hey karena1593,

I think your post is a good match for this forum; a lack of a sense of who am I, and frequent ?infatuation? (lacking a better word here) with others personalities is something people with HPD often write about. In particular, that focus on 1-dimensional personalities, over-the-top, extremes of the type seen in movies, on TV, etc.

So just a personal opinion (i.e., not fact), we all do what we do because we are getting something out of it. Any insights into what you are getting out of latching on to others personalities, or getting out of avoiding forming a strong sense of your own?