How exactly should I or would I feel sorry for you?

I have been reading a few posts that want to know why we are so pissed at the HPD's in our life by HPDs themselves. Gimme a break. Do you really have to ask why we feel used, violated, emotionally raped and lifeless after having the unfortunate experience of meeting one and having a relationship with one of you people. I am sorry but whenever i read other people's posts I feel sorry for them and not one ounce of pity for the bitch that did it to them. She can go cry to someone else. Typical HPD to come here and bitch about us venting about you lifeless bloodsuckers sucking our life away. Still all about you isn't it?

hmm, u seem angry; well unfortunately i don't have the ability to empathize. personally, i never asked anyone here to feel sorry for me...but if you don't want to hear an HPD perspective, maybe u shouldn't read what they post?

Well for me I've come to respect all of the HPD's that have visited our forum.

For me I only hold anger towards people who've wronged me and not apologized and my ex is among them. I bear no ill will towards people with her same disorder as they have not harmed me.

All of the HPD's that have come here well just about all anyway including lostHPD, digital, Genevieve and mylife have offered their insights and help to us victims and I think that counts for something.

Certainly digital and lostHPD can get carried away at times but I have observed them feeling remorse at times for their disordered actions on others with admittadly most of lostHPD's remorse making itself known to me in PM.

The HPD forum goers we have here I believe genuinely do not know the total impact of their behaviour on others and genuinely want to know if we really are effected as badly as their past lovers seemed to of been and I think its because these HPD's that have come here want to change and are looking for verification that it is important for them to change not only for the good of others but for the good of themselves as well.

I understand your anger totally bountyman and I was quite angry when I came here too but I must warn you and everyone on the forum as I was warned once about getting carried away myself before becoming a moderator.

We must all try to remain civil to eachother and towards the disordered as I truly do not want to have to ban anyone here and definitely they too must make an attempt at civility here.

For example HPD/NPD disordered poster Digital has agreed to play nice and I'm sure you will too from now on.

I understand that this is a frustrated venting post so I will leave it up and ask that if members make other venting posts in the future the harsh language is kept toned down but the forcible opinion remains the same.

Basically the goal with these kind of posts on our board is to express ones anger but without using too much inflammatory language in doing so.

Oh dear, we have another victim. Personally I wasn't too surprised to see HPDs campaigning for pity in the HPD forum. I guess I expected it. Controller X is right though, mate, if an HPD is even posting here then they are probably miles ahead of the one that hurt you (Seeing they have accepted that they have the illness). Also, not every HPD is a 'bitch', some of us are 'bastards' (Sorry Kontroller, but it's not like it's aimed at anyone). The main reason I post here is to expose myself to criticism. Constructive criticism. I don't take it well, but I recognise it's value. In effect, this forum has become a log of my recovery from HPD. I think this inadvertently give victims a bit of insight into their previous problems, and a bit of hope for those they thought they hated. So when you wipe away the tears and fix your hair, maybe you might see the value of having HPDs in a HPD forum. See you around. (If you haven't been deleted...)

Apologies for digging up an old thread...

Isn't it laudable that a person with HPD is showing an interest in other peoples' feelings? Isn't it commendable that they're on this forum in the first place?

digital.noface wrote:Oh dear, we have another victim. Personally I wasn't too surprised to see HPDs campaigning for pity in the HPD forum. I guess I expected it. Controller X is right though, mate, if an HPD is even posting here then they are probably miles ahead of the one that hurt you (Seeing they have accepted that they have the illness). Also, not every HPD is a 'bitch', some of us are 'bastards' (Sorry Kontroller, but it's not like it's aimed at anyone). The main reason I post here is to expose myself to criticism. Constructive criticism. I don't take it well, but I recognise it's value. In effect, this forum has become a log of my recovery from HPD. I think this inadvertently give victims a bit of insight into their previous problems, and a bit of hope for those they thought they hated. So when you wipe away the tears and fix your hair, maybe you might see the value of having HPDs in a HPD forum. See you around. (If you haven't been deleted...)

It is because you have no soul. You need to reap the soul of others. You are inhumane without your empathy! Empathy is necessary. You need a soul...

Kane wrote:It is because you have no potatoes. You need to reap the potatoes of others. You are inhumane without your potatoes! Empathy is necessary. You need a potato...

Shenme?

Isn't it laudable that a person with HPD is showing an interest in other peoples' feelings? Isn't it commendable that they're on this forum in the first place?

Hmmm, are they really showing interest or appearing to? Are they really seeking help, or is the forum just a good source of already primed supply?

From time to time I see an interesting dynamic of former 'victims' playing out their old roles with an hpd- such as advising, complimenting and reassuring. Are they even aware that they've slipped back into that role?

Of course I could be wrong- just throwing out the topic for debate. And by the way, hi, I'm Sunshine.

sunshinegirl wrote:Hmmm, are they really showing interest or appearing to? Are they really seeking help, or is the forum just a good source of already primed supply?

From time to time I see an interesting dynamic of former 'victims' playing out their old roles with an hpd- such as advising, complimenting and reassuring. Are they even aware that they've slipped back into that role?

Of course I could be wrong- just throwing out the topic for debate. And by the way, hi, I'm Sunshine.

I like you already.

Hi Sunshine,

Hmmm, are they really showing interest or appearing to? Are they really seeking help, or is the forum just a good source of already primed supply?

If they're driven the same way as my soon-to-be ex, they are driven by fear of their self-loathing. They're scared $h17less of having to look at themselves in a negative light. In order to be on this forum in the first place, they must first confront the scariest thing they can contend with: admitting that there's something wrong with them.
I think that's kinda brave, and I think that precludes the possibility that they're only "appearing to". But just my assumption.

From time to time I see an interesting dynamic of former 'victims' playing out their old roles with an hpd- such as advising, complimenting and reassuring. Are they even aware that they've slipped back into that role?

Or perhaps it's because the former victims were targetted in the first place because it's in their nature to want to help others. Can't say, but at least in my case I'm not here to fawn over the HPDs, I'm here to gain an understanding of what's happened to me and help others if I can.

HTHs...